How to get Husband to jump on the bandwagon!

obeseto13point1

My husband and I are both overweight. I used to be alot heavier than I am now, and have lost 3/4 of the weight I need to lose. My husband keeps saying that he's going to start working out, start tracking his calories, start this and that but he doesn't actually ever do these things for more than a few days. This might sound bad, but I really want him to lose weight. He has a family history of many different health problems, and I don't want him to end up with these issues, and we have a daughter that I want us both to set a good example for! He thinks that since he eats healthy at dinnertime when he is home with me that is enough, but he is 50ish pounds overweight and has a desk job so he doesn't get any exercise. I want to figure out ways to encourage him that will work.

JNick77

My husband and I are both overweight. I used to be alot heavier than I am now, and have lost 3/4 of the weight I need to lose. My husband keeps saying that he's going to start working out, start tracking his calories, start this and that but he doesn't actually ever do these things for more than a few days. This might sound bad, but I really want him to lose weight. He has a family history of many different health problems, and I don't want him to end up with these issues, and we have a daughter that I want us both to set a good example for! He thinks that since he eats healthy at dinnertime when he is home with me that is enough, but he is 50ish pounds overweight and has a desk job so he doesn't get any exercise. I want to figure out ways to encourage him that will work.

Sex always works. Reward him with some freaky.

wolfehound22

Could u have him work out with you, I think if I left it up to my wife to workout on her own, she wouldn't but I get her going and have her workout with me. I also make our lunches along with all the other meals (she tends to my son a lot, and I am home before her at night) so just eats what I make, You don't want to push to hard, as that could take a negative turn, but maybe necourage him to workout with u.

izoom3

Just like when you were more overweight, HE has to want to lose the weight. You cant make him. Your cant talk him into it. You cant track for him. You cant exercise for him. If and when he is ready he will want to lose the weight. Be there for him then.
You can bring only healthy foods into the house. You can set an example. You can serve smaller portion sizes. You can be active yourself....and take your child on activities. You can be proud of how you look and feel and make sure you mention how great you feel....he will see how great you look. Be patient.

jarrettd

Sadly, motivation usually has to come from within. You could bribe, threaten, and coerce, and maybe get him to go along with you...while you are looking. But sooner or later, there would be resentment, then rebellion. He has to own it for it to stick.

Set an example without being judgemental, and wait. He'll either come around, or he won't. But it doesn't benefit your household or his health to make it into a power struggle.

1964Ford

I am sure that you have heard the old saying, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink? Maybe if you invited him for a relaxing evening walk around the neighborhood or something like that. Sometimes showing that you would rather spend time with someone and do something active during that time is better than trying to motivate somebody to workout. I have found that when I get active I feel better and become more self motivated to keep going. For me, when I am feeling pressure, that is probably the worst motivator in the world for me. It does sound like your daughter has a wonderful example in you. Keep up the good work:laugh:

Nikkei24

Just keep doing what your doing and hopefully eventually he will follow along. If you figure it out please let me know cause I would for my fiance to jump on the band wagon with me. He has been eating healthier on and off and loggin on and off similiar to your husband but I can't make all his choices for me. I posted something similar looking for ideas on what i could say to him to help kick him into motion and got a wave of responses telling me to leave him and not to marry him. (A bit drastic if you ask me) I'll stay with him and hopes he follows my lead.

JustJennie1

Just keep doing what your doing and hopefully eventually he will follow along. If you figure it out please let me know cause I would for my fiance to jump on the band wagon with me. He has been eating healthier on and off and loggin on and off similiar to your husband but I can't make all his choices for me. I posted something similar looking for ideas on what i could say to him to help kick him into motion and got a wave of responses telling me to leave him and not to marry him. (A bit drastic if you ask me) I'll stay with him and hopes he follows my lead.

I'd say take the advice you just gave. Your fiance will eventually follow along (hopefully anyway). Is there a way to maybe get him outside and take walks or bike rides with you? Go for a hike in the summer?

I've been tracking my cals since December and back in February my husband decided that he wanted to do it too but he's too lazy to track so I set him up on MFP and I track his cals for him. It's actually kind of fun and nice to have a partner. I'll admit that it was difficult for me before he started being conscious of his calories because he'd be munching on stuff late at night and then I'd get the munchies and my whole day would go to hell. Now if he wants something he'll ask how many calories he has left and when he eats something he'll tell me about it. That coupled with the fact that we go to the gym together and have added extra cardio in our days (because we got adopted by a dog last month) he's lost pretty close to 10 lbs and I'm down 5.

Maybe if you let your fiance know how much it would mean to you if he did this with you and how easier it would be if he were your partner in it and if you were the one to log his calories and stuff it might be easier.

Or must leave him. J/K

Let me also add that the motivation is due to the fact that we have a vacation coming up in a few months which we both have a mid-goal to reach. The journey doesn't end there because he has a lot more he wants to lose before Thanksgiving.

Kupe

As a husband and father this is my thoughts.

He needs to have an epiphany, I had my wake up call when took my then 5 year old to the park to play. When he was still running and I was out of puff after 10 minutes. I knew things had to change.

As a man, feedback when it is negative and especially from your wife is not what you want to hear, however as a husband and father you need to be aware of your responsibilities. I always wanted to complete a marathon, so that became my goal.

I didn't sign up for my first marathon until I was mentally confident that I could actually do it. However once I signed up I was committed and that is what kept me on track. So my bit of advise would be to speak to your husband and find out what is his sporting dream is and make it a reality. Don't take the excuse that money is an issue as I believe your health is more important than how much is in that bank.

It doesn't cost anything to walk, then run. Public pools are cheap and if you live by the ocean it's free.

Friend me as I am happy to support.

twinmomtwice4

My husband is the same way. He needs to lose at least 30-40 pounds and he knows it, says he's going to do it but then never does.

His father just survived Stage 3 colon cancer and you'd think that would be a huge wake up call for him. He also has extremely high cholesterol which is frightening and his doctor just put him on blood pressure meds.

I don't know what other dangers need to happen for him to realize this is his life we're talking about. There are no second chances.

I can't even talk to him about it anymore b/c I know he has to want to do it for himself.

Feel free to friend me and maybe we can help one another through this!!!

Lesa_Sass

Sadly, motivation usually has to come from within. You could bribe, threaten, and coerce, and maybe get him to go along with you...while you are looking. But sooner or later, there would be resentment, then rebellion. He has to own it for it to stick.

Set an example without being judgemental, and wait. He'll either come around, or he won't. But it doesn't benefit your household or his health to make it into a power struggle.

^^^^This.

We can not make them change, they have to want to do it. All you can do is make sure there are nothing but healthy nutritious foods in the house so he will have to go out of his way to eat bad. I know this is not what you wanna hear but this is the same advice I give to women who come to me for advice on how to get their husbands to stop drinking. They have to want to do it on their own or it is not going to work.

Set a good example for him, he could come around or he may not. The choice is his and his only to make. One thing you can do is express to him what you did to us, he will either care or not.

Jo_permiegirl

I hear ya!!! as many who are on here I too have a wonderful husband who just doesn't seem to get it when it comes to being serious about getting healthy.

I have tried everything but all that happens is it becomes a constant battle and we end up being resentful toward one another..... not a good thing at all.

I asked him to lose weight and get healthy as my wedding anniversary present from him. I told, i him don't want flowers, diamonds, perfume or anything like that, just a healthy husband and dad.

slowly we are making baby steps, he doesn't calorie count but is trying to make healthier choices. He walks a fair bit with his job but needs to do a whole lot more if he is to get healthy.

He signed up for MFP but says he doesn't know how to use it!!! - i have offered to help him on many occasions but again, I just sound like a nagging wife.

I believe in him and I know myself that the light bulb moment will happen for him one day. Add him and me if you like (flintha)

keep your faith in him and tell him daily that you love and believe in him as a man, husband and Dad...

beaglenutty

Im so glad I saw this post! Im in the same boat with my hubby. He wont count calories but Im trying to make healthy meals for all of us. He likes bike riding so I want to try to get a trailor to go behind the bike so we can take the kids and go. Hoping he finally has had enough and will want to lose the wt.