Damn alcohol.

Had a bit of a wake up call today. I drink alcohol, and get drunk, pretty much every weekend. My group of friends are heavy social drinkers and it's just what we do when we spend time together, which is obviously a lot. I used to drink cider before I couldn't bear the thought of all the calories, so switched to wine, which I know isn't all that much better.
However today, I woke up, hungover, and I had a really crap night last night, got too drunk, did some things I regret. And Now I just thought it's not worth it, I want to stop drinking basically, and see if I feel a difference.
Wat I'm asking for advice on is how to explain this to my friends, and work with me not drinking, when it's literally all we do. I don't want to drink anymore but it'll be a huge change and they'll all be confused, and probably think I'm joking.

Replies

  • PrincessLou71186
    PrincessLou71186 Posts: 741 Member
    You could just tell them the truth.

    It'll be much easier in the long run.
  • hillysuze
    hillysuze Posts: 18 Member
    I agree. Tell the truth. If they really care about being friends with you instead of having a good time, they'll understand.
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
    If they are real friends they will support you. If not, get new friends. No one is more important than you.
  • migoi357
    migoi357 Posts: 173 Member
    Volunteer to be the permanent designated driver. You all do have/use a designated driver don't you?:drinker:
  • lizziegrace10
    lizziegrace10 Posts: 46 Member
    Thanks guys, you're right. I'll just tell them I wanna see how it affects me, should be fine :)
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I would tell them that you are going to do a personal experiment, where you can only have one drink each night- because you want to see what replacing alcohol with water will do to your skin and body for the summer, and you think its gonna be pretty cool- and ask if anyone wants to take the dare with you.

    Make it about personal bull-by-the-horns business that you are telling your friends about, since it is YOUR life :D instead of thinking of it as 'how can i get away with doing what i want when i dont think my friends will like it'

    Be the main character in your story - they may love your idea!
  • lizziegrace10
    lizziegrace10 Posts: 46 Member
    Volunteer to be the permanent designated driver. You all do have/use a designated driver don't you?:drinker:

    Haha this would be an awesome idea, if I could drive! I'll use the money I save from alcohol on driving lessons :tongue:
  • hoffo83
    hoffo83 Posts: 51
    show them this post. true friends will understand and support you. they may even want to do the same thing but feel the same as you
  • lizziegrace10
    lizziegrace10 Posts: 46 Member
    I would tell them that you are going to do a personal experiment, where you can only have one drink each night- because you want to see what replacing alcohol with water will do to your skin and body for the summer, and you think its gonna be pretty cool- and ask if anyone wants to take the dare with you.

    Make it about personal bull-by-the-horns business that you are telling your friends about, since it is YOUR life :D instead of thinking of it as 'how can i get away with doing what i want when i dont think my friends will like it'

    Be the main character in your story - they may love your idea!

    I like this idea! The whole personal experiment thing sounds cool, that's pretty much what I'm going for anyway :D
  • Echo17121
    Echo17121 Posts: 111 Member
    I had two friends who stopped drinking in social situations- one because the medication she was on would give her mega headaches if she drank too much (so you could try something like that if you feel like lying?) and the other because she would just get too drunk and would lose things/break her phone/pretty much just lose control. With both of them, I didn't really care because they are super fun to just be around in general.

    I have kinda been in the same boat as you where drinking is starting to get old and the calories alone from drinking and then the food you end up eating sets me back. I know the majority of my friends would be cool with it as long as when we go out I don't just sit there. They love to dance! The group I tailgate with at baseball games on Sundays is a different story and I have lied to them and faked a hangover just to not drink that day lol. I think if I was honest with them though, they wouldn't care either, they just want me to have a good time.

    I agree with everyone posting here and if you are serious about it (because for some reason after time has past, a beer always sounds so good to me lol), be honest with your friends and promise them that you will not be a debbie downer when you go out with them. If you are all out to have a good time, it can totally be done without alcohol!
  • Kathee1956
    Kathee1956 Posts: 8 Member
    I do know what you mean, but saying that, I like to impress on you that if they are really your friends, they shouldn't have a problem with you decision to not drink. You will still be out having fun with them after all...isn't that the whole point of going out in the first place? Good Luck
  • lizziegrace10
    lizziegrace10 Posts: 46 Member
    Totally, I mean we're not constantly drinking :tongue: I do hope I'm still fun on a night out sober haha! I'll just be weirder than usual and hop on one leg all night or something.
  • Maybe if you're honest with them, one on one, they'll start thinking of their futures and how they're pissing away a lot of their life by getting drunk all the time. It's not so uncommon to have a "wake up call" when you feel like crap for abusing yourself. I too had that wake up call after several nights of over-doing it and feeling like garbage all the time. It REALLY hits you when you're the only sober one around a bunch of drunks (and can't drink - not even one)... you may be disgusted that you ever let yourself get that way, or you may miss it... totally depends on the individual. I for one am glad that I don't want to go back to that lifestyle.

    I was honest with one of my friends about drinking - we used to drink all the time together, very heavily... I put myself at so much risk looking back on those times just thinking about the things we used to do. Years later, I think she's finally seeing the light and not drinking so much anymore, but I've continually tried to hint to her that it's not worth it, because I don't want to see her end up an alcoholic for life. Me not drinking didn't affect our relationship. We're still the best of friends, but we don't hang out as much, simply because my lifestyle has changed.

    I guess what I'm trying to say is, don't expect them to be helpful in your decision to stop drinking.. you're at a crossroad in life... they may choose to follow the path you're on, and they may not, and you have to understand that. But, for what it's worth, you're making the right decision. It may be time to hang out with people that have healthier lifestyles... just sayin'.

    I've seen alcohol ruin lives, marriages / relationships, finances, health... it's one of the worst "drugs" out there. Who cares what they think? It's your life, not theirs! Time to start living.

    :wink:
  • SarLem81
    SarLem81 Posts: 115 Member
    You should tell them the truth. Perhaps try to find some friends who can show you what you can do for fun while sober. I went through this in college (although, I think a lot of people have experienced something like this at some point in their lives). Unfortunately for me, those friends just didn't understand and I ended up just slowly withdrawing myself from hanging out with them. They were upset with me, but it was just what I needed to do for myself. I hope in your case, these are real friends and not just drinking buddies. It isn't easy to make the transition and it's a lot easier when you have support.

    I still drink, but not to the excess that I used to. When I first cut drinking out from my daily activities, I was amazed at the weight loss that occured when I wasn't even trying. It was just because I wasn't drinking all the time anymore. I love having a glass of wine (or beer) or two with my friends. It makes it that much more enjoyable because we're just giddy, not hammered.

    Good luck!
  • neverstray
    neverstray Posts: 3,845 Member
    Actually, everyone is being kind, but I've gone through that.

    You might find the following: with many of your friends, pretty much all you have in common is drinking together. You might not not believe me right now, but when you stop, you will find that you won't want to hang with some if them. Also, some of them won't want to hang with you either. It depends if you do others stuff, or if they are just drinking buddies.

    In my case, I found myself without a lot of friends. I am making new ones that like do do other things besides drinking all day and night.
  • Cowenlaw1
    Cowenlaw1 Posts: 105 Member
    You will probably find that your friends are boring and annoying when they are drunk and you are not.
  • SuffolkSally
    SuffolkSally Posts: 964 Member
    I told everyone I was giving up for a month just to see what it was like, as part of getting healthy/losing weight etc. Some people were surprised. An amazing number said they wished they could do the same as they weren't comfortable with the drinking levels either! Anyone that was areal friend wasn't bothered, I still got invited out as much. I did though find I didn't always want to go - the crowd that are just out to get wrecked are incredibly boring when you're sober, and I felt disgusted that I'd ever let myself be that way. I did different things instead.

    I'm still getting there - I told myself I'd be able to just have one or two drinks after a bit of practice, but that was adismal failure! For me it's much easier not to drink at all, and truly it hasn't been that hard.

    Good luck!