Anyone ever been scared to lose weight?

luv2rite

I was a skinny kid. Once puberty hit, I ballooned, and I've had trouble losing ever since. Fast forward a little over 20 years, and I've finally found a diet and exercise program that works for me and makes me feel great. I'm 35 years old, and I've never been married, I've had one serious relationship that turned out to be completely one-sided. My last date was in February of 2009. Now that I'm losing weight, I'm finding that I feel a little apprehensive. Being overweight has been my excuse for not putting myself out there for so long, and it's also why I tell myself no one hits on me. Part of me is scared that, once the fat is gone, I'll still have the problem, and then what? I always thought I was pretty, and that it was the weight that made me ugly. I'm a likable person who is friendly and most people consider to be cool. What if I find out that my weigt wasn't the problem, and that people really just think I'm ugly? Has this ever been a concern to anyone else?

LaMujerMasBonitaDelMundo

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder & no one has the right to call you ugly, no matter what size you are. I've been called ugly & discriminated as a kid (note: I was a normal weight kid) then when I gained weight, my family would always compare me to my skinny (but not that attractive) sister & that I would be prettier if only I lose weight. Now that I lost big, all I hear are compliments but honestly the wounds that they done to me in the past still not healed & I'm thinking if they're really mean it or just because I'm now slim. Sometimes its not the weight nor your beauty, its the attitude that counts.

saintspoon

This has TOTALLY been a concern to me!

I was 260 & now I'm 218ish ... when I was 260 I never had a real BF & I figured it was the same reason guys didn't hit on me. I found that guys did look at me completely different once the weight started coming off. I have the kind of body that looks like a big ball at 260 but some major curves at 220 as you start to see I have hips & boobs & not just super belly. Anyway... yeah guys would look me in the eyes & smile & one thing that blew my mind is they started to open doors for me & stuff like that.

Unfortunatly that's pretty much where the guy new guy attention wears down.

You will be able to find dates way easier now... the hard part is that the dating world is tough & people (both guys & gals) can be dinks & no matter how hot or thin you are you will still have to deal with mind-games, guys who just want sex & douche bags in general. On top of it we don't have the years of experience like most girls to equip us to deal with this... & as formally fat girls we have major self esteem issues so it's extra easy for guys to mess with you.

But everybody deals with the dating game wether they are fat, used to be fat or are in the best shape ever.. just look for someone who is attracted to you & don't take any crap

saintspoon

btw... ^ that was my 100th post!! :drinker:

littlepinkhearts

I was a skinny kid. Once puberty hit, I ballooned, and I've had trouble losing ever since. Fast forward a little over 20 years, and I've finally found a diet and exercise program that works for me and makes me feel great. I'm 35 years old, and I've never been married, I've had one serious relationship that turned out to be completely one-sided. My last date was in February of 2009. Now that I'm losing weight, I'm finding that I feel a little apprehensive. Being overweight has been my excuse for not putting myself out there for so long, and it's also why I tell myself no one hits on me. Part of me is scared that, once the fat is gone, I'll still have the problem, and then what? I always thought I was pretty, and that it was the weight that made me ugly. I'm a likable person who is friendly and most people consider to be cool. What if I find out that my weigt wasn't the problem, and that people really just think I'm ugly? Has this ever been a concern to anyone else?

If your'e losing the weight slowly, you'll have lots of time to adjust to the new you and how people react to you. Find some supportive people who can help you out with your concerns as the weight comes off. It's a lot more "attitude" then looks. We've all seen cosmetically beautiful people but their attitude is conceited, rude or totally obnoxious. Don't let these thoughts stop you from being the you that you are meant to be. Things will fall into place as you move along :flowerforyou:

luv2rite

This has TOTALLY been a concern to me!

I was 260 & now I'm 218ish ... when I was 260 I never had a real BF & I figured it was the same reason guys didn't hit on me. I found that guys did look at me completely different once the weight started coming off. I have the kind of body that looks like a big ball at 260 but some major curves at 220 as you start to see I have hips & boobs & not just super belly. Anyway... yeah guys would look me in the eyes & smile & one thing that blew my mind is they started to open doors for me & stuff like that.

This is me. I started at 259. I'm at 228 right now.

luv2rite

Thanks all for sharing your stories and support. It's very encouraging.