Give up?

My doctors' diagnosis is "complex co-morbidity" chronic condition. I am almost 300 lbs, about 5'4", 56, female, with multiple physical and psychological concerns. The shrinks say it's impossible for me to lost weight because of the psych problems. The physical docs say the diabetes, heart and lung problems, and other chronic conditions say I "should" but can't advise "how to." Their only positive was that I don't have a family or friends so I don't need to worry about feeding anyone but me and the dog.

With all this negative...I want to lose weight in a positive manner. My work is pushing people to "increase wellness", but I don't fit into their program because of the above problems.

Last summer I was gifted with a trip overseas to Iona. On Iona, there is no transportation. You take two ferries and cross an island to get there. A minimum walk from the hostel is 3 miles. Yet, I surprised the group by doing this easily. No breathing problems. Yet when I returned to the States, everything fell apart.

Am I kidding myself that I can actually lose this weight and get in better health? Or should I just not waste other people's time and forget it.....

Replies

  • Pinoy_Pal
    Pinoy_Pal Posts: 280 Member
    NO!!!!! Wrong attitude! Grab this negativity by the neck and punch it in the face. I think it's a very good sign that you took the time to write this thread on MFP. Obviously you DO want to get in better health. Build on that fire already inside you...some people don't even have a spark.
  • CyberEd312
    CyberEd312 Posts: 3,536 Member
    I posted this earlier today in another post that was questioning being to heavy to exercise and get healthy....

    When I started I weighed 560 lbs. and was unable to walk from room to room without the aid of a computer chair to roll myself around the house.. I was pretty much home bound for the last 2 years and in May 2009 I made the choice to get busy living or get busy dying. I choose life, I had to start in the pool because the water displaced my weight enough to allow me to stand and walk in the water so that is what i did.. I had to find the courage to go out in public to do this and ended up going through the wellness center through the YMCA. I spent 17 months in the pool and lost 175 lbs. before I was able to be fitted with braces (for my bad knee's) and was able to start exercising outside of the pool.. Since then I have lost another 130 lbs. and am a few months away from skin surgery and 6 months away from knee replacements. Do not let anyone or anything stand in the way of your own goals. Sometimes you have to look past the doubters and concentrate on yourself... Just do not give up......
  • jcomley1
    jcomley1 Posts: 133
    My heart really goes out to you, and I just wanted to say that I have no idea what it must feel like to be in your shoes. But I really just wanted to encourage you that even if you can start making small steps in your everyday life- it will make the world of difference.
    You are not the first person Doctors have told they wont be able to lose weight and you wont be the last. But in spite of what they say, strive to prove them wrong.
    Make small changes. Choose water over soda, leave the sugar out your tea or coffee, when you crave chocolate try and eat a apple instead. Nobody is saying you need to get up and run a marathon or begin training for Everest. Small changes, small steps, and you will notice a difference. Be encouraged that other people have done this before you, and theres no such thing as not being able to lose weight. Take a positive stance. There are thousands of people on this website who felt at some point that they wanted to give up - hell i have. But the fact that you care enough to try says a lot about you as a person. Stay motivated. Dont give up. Small steps in the right direction...
  • drmattski
    drmattski Posts: 124 Member
    My heart really goes out to you, and I just wanted to say that I have no idea what it must feel like to be in your shoes. But I really just wanted to encourage you that even if you can start making small steps in your everyday life- it will make the world of difference.
    You are not the first person Doctors have told they wont be able to lose weight and you wont be the last. But in spite of what they say, strive to prove them wrong.
    Make small changes. Choose water over soda, leave the sugar out your tea or coffee, when you crave chocolate try and eat a apple instead. Nobody is saying you need to get up and run a marathon or begin training for Everest. Small changes, small steps, and you will notice a difference. Be encouraged that other people have done this before you, and theres no such thing as not being able to lose weight. Take a positive stance. There are thousands of people on this website who felt at some point that they wanted to give up - hell i have. But the fact that you care enough to try says a lot about you as a person. Stay motivated. Dont give up. Small steps in the right direction...

    ^^^^Very well said - small steps. A journey of a 1,000 miles begins with one step, right?

    In addition, Ed Davenport's post is truly amazing - if he can do it,I think anyone can make progress if they want to. But the key is, you have to want to do it - no one can force you.

    All the best.
  • saraann4
    saraann4 Posts: 1,296 Member
    I posted this earlier today in another post that was questioning being to heavy to exercise and get healthy....

    When I started I weighed 560 lbs. and was unable to walk from room to room without the aid of a computer chair to roll myself around the house.. I was pretty much home bound for the last 2 years and in May 2009 I made the choice to get busy living or get busy dying. I choose life, I had to start in the pool because the water displaced my weight enough to allow me to stand and walk in the water so that is what i did.. I had to find the courage to go out in public to do this and ended up going through the wellness center through the YMCA. I spent 17 months in the pool and lost 175 lbs. before I was able to be fitted with braces (for my bad knee's) and was able to start exercising outside of the pool.. Since then I have lost another 130 lbs. and am a few months away from skin surgery and 6 months away from knee replacements. Do not let anyone or anything stand in the way of your own goals. Sometimes you have to look past the doubters and concentrate on yourself... Just do not give up......


    You are truely an inspiration. Congrats on your weight loss! :)
  • saraann4
    saraann4 Posts: 1,296 Member
    My doctors' diagnosis is "complex co-morbidity" chronic condition. I am almost 300 lbs, about 5'4", 56, female, with multiple physical and psychological concerns. The shrinks say it's impossible for me to lost weight because of the psych problems. The physical docs say the diabetes, heart and lung problems, and other chronic conditions say I "should" but can't advise "how to." Their only positive was that I don't have a family or friends so I don't need to worry about feeding anyone but me and the dog.

    With all this negative...I want to lose weight in a positive manner. My work is pushing people to "increase wellness", but I don't fit into their program because of the above problems.

    Last summer I was gifted with a trip overseas to Iona. On Iona, there is no transportation. You take two ferries and cross an island to get there. A minimum walk from the hostel is 3 miles. Yet, I surprised the group by doing this easily. No breathing problems. Yet when I returned to the States, everything fell apart.

    Am I kidding myself that I can actually lose this weight and get in better health? Or should I just not waste other people's time and forget it.....

    You have already taken a stand! You want to lose weight which is why you are here.

    You can lose weight. You have to believe that. Everytime you look in the mirror just say to yourself "I can do this."

    I'm currently at 256lbs and looking in the mirror is a horrible thing, but I just tell myself, I won't look like this forever. I want to be healthy. I refuse to get to 300lbs. I know that I CAN do this!

    I'm going to add you as a friend. I think we can definately help each other. Keep your spirits up and always keep a good attitude. It has helped me so far! :)
  • Hi I'm Ayana. I'm from Texas but I'm going to college on Iowa. Trying to make all these changes to my life while in collge has been a bit rough. I think at this point I havve given up. I need to loose 120 pounds. Just looking for some to lean and help as well.

    Ayana:smile:
  • I know you can do this. It may not be easy, but it will be worth it. You have taken the first step.
  • innapin
    innapin Posts: 3
    I cannot believe your psychiatrist would tell you what he/ she told you ... perhaps you need a different doctor. Many health problems ease with the weight loss. You don't need your psychiatrist putting negative thinkin on you you need some one to help pull the strength you have within OUT It is hard and i am an emotional eater so I am trying to figure out how to not use food to make me FEEL good. Don't give up find different guidance :flowerforyou:
  • 75Juniper
    75Juniper Posts: 376
    NO!!!!! Wrong attitude! Grab this negativity by the neck and punch it in the face.


    This!!! When I started my weight loss journey, I made a list of all the issues I have because of my weight. Some were medical issues, some were as simple as not being able to bend down and pick up something off the ground. I decided to periodically review it to remind myself of why I'm focusing on making healthy choices with a goal of one day having a piece of paper with everything crossed off.

    It doesn't take a massive amount of weight loss. I'm still obese. I've only lost 21 pounds. But I've already crossed ONE THIRD of the items off my list. Trust me, once you lose just a tiny bit of weight, you'll feel better and you'll notice changes, and you will want to keep going.

    You can do this! Don't listen to ANYONE who says you can't do it - no matter what reason they give, no matter what their profession, no matter what they say.

    YOU CAN DO THIS! It just takes one small step.
  • staps065
    staps065 Posts: 837 Member
    You can do it! If you have the means set up an appointment with a Dietitian and get a plan. You may want to look for a another doctor and phychiatrist/psychologist if they are telling you you "can't" do something. Sounds counter-productive and not at all emcouraging that both should be doing. Jusy my opinion but doctors and psychologist are human and have flaws just like the rest of us.
  • Dare2Believe
    Dare2Believe Posts: 140 Member
    Doctors and Psychologists are not always right, especially when it comes to one person's willingness to try their hardest to get well. It wont be easy but it can be done! There are many people on here that have lost 100, 200 and more pounds. Please don't give up before you even try. Perhaps join a group for people who have more than 100 pounds to lose would give you the encouragement you need right now to get started.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/3989-100-pounds-to-lose-lets-support-eachother
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/3322-100-pounds-with-no-surgery

    I'm adding this one that I am a member of. You will find a lot of very supportive people there if you wish to join.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/3288-we-are-made-to-crave-let-s-get-fit-4-christ

    I wish you success as you begin your weight-loss journey.
  • indrani1947
    indrani1947 Posts: 178 Member
    you can do this, one step at a time, even walking on the spot indoors or doing arm exercises sitting every little step forward will help...especially with support on this site... good luck