Eating sufficient calories - I'm scared!

Dragonnade

I'm new to dieting/eating healthy generally and to say I've no clue what I'm doing would be an understatement.

Short version: I'm now trying to eat 40/30/30 and net at least my BMR, averaged per day over a three day period. I go to the gym generally 2 days on, 1 day off which lets me compensate for any net deficits on gym days.
And I'm terrified, despite feeling healthier, more awake, able to focus etc on more calories, that I'm never going to lose weight if I'm netting so many calories!


Long version:
I started out like most people trying to eat 1200 calories, not go over this and then getting shouted at by MFP for starving when I didn't. I also wiped out my blood sugar levels, got ratty, nearly cried and raided the chocolate stash.
After this I re-evaluated and, with sadness and relief, upped the calories to whatever MFP said would be 1lb a week loss. And still felt quite awful and would be tired all day after the gym, raid the beer (within calories!!!) and sleep masses in an attempt to become human for the next day.
Then a good friend of mine upped her calories after plateuing for age and I read what she did and the maths and, being something of a stats geek, it all made perfect sense. So I'm trying to get to the point where I'm eating enough to have a quality of life and lose weight and keep muscle.

And my brain is fighting me every step of the way.

I have scales that you can store all the data on a USB so I can weigh every day and ignore it (there's a picture of a bunny covering the screen as I was getting a bit het up) which tells me that, for instance, this last week, I did lose every day except for the one planned binge day (Boat Race on Saturday) which, coupled with Easter and my gym being closed, messed up my routine. I had 3 days on ~2000 calories net, and 3 on <1200 net as a result. And that isn't bad - if things continue this way, I should have a nice loss next week where there's no annual sporting events to binge at. However my brain is turning into a malevolent force and apart from thinking "what's the damage" when checking the stats for the week, it's now attempting to say one week with only .1kg loss means it's not working, despite it being a totally non-standard week.

Logically I know that I need to keep doing what I'm doing, so I can focus to work, be faintly cheerful, sleep less than 10 hours a night and retain these nice muscles that are appearing in my arms. Possibly I should even aim to eat a higher 3-day net.

But I can't bear to do the maths in more detail in case that's what the numbers say. All my brain can say is "eat less to lose weight" like some poorly written Heat Magazine starvation tactics [diet] page.

So I'm looking for some support really, because I never knew how hard it could be to eat!!

lambertj

Start by going to http://www.fat2fitradio.com/tools/bmr/ - Calculate your BMR and then add your activity level to get your final TDEE and eat slightly below it (some say 20-30% below).

Juleeroch

In a word - havent a clue.

But I would be interested in any answers

amy1612

My advice would be to stop stressing so much and just go with it. If you're feeling better, then thats the main thing for now. Feel better, and use that energy to keep up good workouts. Eat healthy, and see what happens. If you focus too much on calories and lbs lost you'll just become obsessed and end up self sabotaging (like you have been).
Ive been the same (healthy range though I would like to lean down a bit) healthy weight for around a year now, I usually stick to eating really healthy during the week, and being a little more lenient on a weekend. I also only usually drink alcohol on a weekend too. I workout 5-6 days a week, I do both strength and cardio. Ive maintained by eating around 1500-2000 calories a day, probably more on a weekend. Your metabolism will speed up with exercising, and the weight will start to come off. Just keep at it, its by no means a fast journey, but you'll get there.x

Dragonnade

@amy1612 Thanks - impatient and obsessive personality isn't really helping at all! Perhaps I get get my brain on a new mantra along the lines of "It's a long game and and you've got work to do" which would be more productive on about 11 levels.

@lambertj - 30% below is 1503; 20% is1718. To say this terrifies me is an understatement; how to eat that without resorting to McDonald's is my next question!

Dragonnade

Another question - once I've set mfp to 25% below TDEE, do I eat back exercise calories?

lambertj

Another question - once I've set mfp to 25% below TDEE, do I eat back exercise calories?

Yes! But.....not all and if you are going by MFP I would be careful, they show calories burned way too high as do the machines. Maybe eat back a percentage

lambertj

@amy1612 Thanks - impatient and obsessive personality isn't really helping at all! Perhaps I get get my brain on a new mantra along the lines of "It's a long game and and you've got work to do" which would be more productive on about 11 levels.

@lambertj - 30% below is 1503; 20% is1718. To say this terrifies me is an understatement; how to eat that without resorting to McDonald's is my next question!

If you have to get more calories eat healthy nuts (sunflowers, almonds, walnuts), A small serving (1/4 cup) goes a long way) Greek yogurt is great too.

Dragonnade

I have a hrm for calories so they, at least are accurate. I tend to burn circa 600 in a good gym session so is eating back around 50% an idea? Or higher?

Recently had a bad reaction to dairy but definitely nuts are a top tip. I shall go shopping and see what I can stock up on. Thank you!! :-)

CassieReannan

Personally I think you are over thinking this waaaaaaaaaaaay too much. Eat the right foods and exercise and the weight will go.

amy1612

Nuts are a great tip!

Try thinking of it this way......decent stats arent gathered immediately, You need comparisons over time. You're conducting a longitudinal study

BerryH

Another question - once I've set mfp to 25% below TDEE, do I eat back exercise calories?

Yes! But.....not all and if you are going by MFP I would be careful, they show calories burned way too high as do the machines. Maybe eat back a percentage

Not in this instance - you will note Fat 2 Fit's calculator includes your exercise in its calculation, whereas MFP doesn't - it only gives you extra calories when you log the exercise you've actually done, not what you plan to do.

Dragonnade

Nuts are a great tip!

Try thinking of it this way......decent stats arent gathered immediately, You need comparisons over time. You're conducting a longitudinal study

This made me laugh way too much!! Thank you!


Ok, I've set calories to tdee minus 25%. Meaning if I do eat back exercise calories in whole or in part, there's leeway sufficient that it should result in minor variations on a consistent downward trend, when observed over, say, a three month period?

I think we may have set enough caveats for my brain to be sated. I hope!! Thanks so much you guys! :-D confidence is returning :-)

lambertj

Nuts are a great tip!

Try thinking of it this way......decent stats arent gathered immediately, You need comparisons over time. You're conducting a longitudinal study

Excellent point, be open to changing things if they don't work but give each change a bit of time to kick in (3 weeks or so). It's kind of fun to see the data

ladyraven68

Nuts are a great tip!

Try thinking of it this way......decent stats arent gathered immediately, You need comparisons over time. You're conducting a longitudinal study

This made me laugh way too much!! Thank you!


Ok, I've set calories to tdee minus 25%. Meaning if I do eat back exercise calories in whole or in part, there's leeway sufficient that it should result in minor variations on a consistent downward trend, when observed over, say, a three month period?

I think we may have set enough caveats for my brain to be sated. I hope!! Thanks so much you guys! :-D confidence is returning :-)

If you've set it to the number from fat2fit minus 25%, that is actually your goal weight TDEE so already has the deficit built in, so you are deducting it twice.

If you want to do it for your current TDEE and deduct 25% you need to put your current weight as your goal weight, and it will give you different figures.

Take your bodymeasurements and bodyfat% now, and record them every few weeks - the difference in the inches will keep you going when the scale doesn't

Dragonnade

Oh that makes sense. OK.

Moderately Active: Current weight as Goal Weight
2220 : 30% down = 1554 : 20% down = 1776

Moderately Active: Goal weight as Goal Weight
2148 : 30% down = 1503 : 20% down = 1718

I'm going to set MFP calories at 1665 then, not log exercise calories until I'm done for the day so I don't eat them back, accept that a little under or a little over isn't the end of the world but a daily minimum of 1503 should be hit. And attempt to turn my obsessing into improving my pace and distance on the rowing machine.

Fingers crossed!