Offloading my emotional state - husband problems

lakersfan4life

Sounds like he was just teasing with you and didn't realize it would be such a distraction...maybe instead of freaking out at him for it, you should sit down with HIM and tell him how you feel...communication. There ya go.

this.

im sure he didnt mean anything by it. and when you freaked on him, he got defensive and yelled back.

i understand why you got upset as it is dangerous to mess with someone while lifting. but no need to yell

grumpy2day

My guy will inquire about what I'm doing/did in the way of exercise most days. Occasionally he gets suspicious that I'm starving myself (so very not starving lol). He'll go for beach walks with me too, but boy will he get pissy if he thinks I'm trying to get him to eat something low-fat/healthy "diet food".:grumble:

brandiranae

Here's how I see it, your husband doesn't feel good about himself so he's taking your success and motivation outon you by putting or down and/or obviously hitting you with a tennis ball. There is a major issue he needs to work on. If he wants to and is willing to change and you are willing to stand by him then great! By all means everyone should better themselves. However, if he is unwilling to change and refuses to support you in your endeavors by letting his own insecurities and jealousies get in the way, then you are better off without him. Hope things get better for you and you continue with your fitness goals.

TourThePast

Sounds as if he's feeling ignored.

He's working long hours and when he's home, he probably wants your companionship.

Also sounds as if he's a bit of a prick...

_SusieQ_

I don't have a lot to add, but I wanted to say that I like the way you think and write. This was a very mature and refreshing take on most of the rants we see on here about significant others.

I had something happen this week with mine, a moment that he did something dumb, I didn't respond well, and it escalated into ugly. It took a day for the emotion to wind down, then I told him that there are some things that I'm not willing to compromise on. You need to tell him that this one thing is yours, and you need him to be ok with it. If he doesn't want to do it with you, fine, but he needs to know that THIS thing is yours, and you need him to get on board with supporting YOU.

Good luck babe, and kudos again on the great grey matter!

des24rob

How you feel is completely justified. I'm single so I'm not going to give some "he's a jerk" rant and blah blah blah because I think marriage is a sacred and wonderful thing. But I do think it is important that you open the lines of communication with him fully & are able to talk about how his actions/way he disreguards what is important to you affects your relationship adversely.

Mrshonopolist05

The only thing that came to mind about him throwing something at you while you doing something important is his immaturity. Men (boys) often don't think before they do stupid things. Maybe he was bored or jealous that you were spending time trying to better yourself and he wanted attention. You should have a serious talk about why you are dieting/exercising and let him know how important it is to you to get healthy and live a healthy lifestyle.

TourThePast

Men (boys) often don't think before they do stupid things

That's very true, but those boys who do eventually become real men are prepared to take responsibility for their actions and start behaving like adults.

Some boys become men surprisingly early in life, others don't ever achieve that status.

I hope for the OP's sake that her petulant little boy mans up real soon...