Desperate for HELP!

hailie08

I've been slacking. My daughter became sick then was in Childrens hospital for weeks and had numerous surgeries. She is finally home and it's time to get back on track! While at the hospital, I ate whatever visitors brought me so usually macdonalds, pizza, etc bc I didn't leave her side at all.
I started back to my job today coaching gymnastics and cheerleading, so that'll help with my calorie burns, plus along with the job I also get a full YMCA membership for free, so I'm going to sneak in workouts during my breaks.
I need help with food though! I have a panic disorder so eating is a big problem for me. For some reason anything that may make someone pass out causes me to panic, and people pass out from not eating enough. So whenever I find myself starting to panic, I reach for a snack high in sugar, same with if I start to feel hungry at all. At the place I am with my panic disorder at this point, I cannot handle going to a therapist office because talking about it makes me panic. I am on numerous medicines so hopefully soon I will be able to go to a therapist:) it also makes it hard to workout. I get really bad headaches when I do cardio and have bad vertigo if I use cardio machines, all things that make me panic. I want to lose the weight! I want to be healthy! I am at the point of trying unhealthy ways of losing weight, and I know how bad that would be. PLEASE HELP!!!