Frustration and loss of motivation

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  • d2rala
    d2rala Posts: 54
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    You've gotten a lot of good advice here.
    You can do this, you just need to keep working at it.
    Remember plateau's are EVERYONE'S nightmare.
    You might want to think of this a a really tough class.
    You either have to work through it - or you will have to repeat it.
    You don't want to repeat it. :-)
    Wishing you the best from Minnesota
  • meagangoss
    meagangoss Posts: 18
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    Dont get discouraged. Im looking at your ticker and looking at mine. You've lost 16 lbs. Thats Great!! I love to be there. just keep at it. Everyone loses weight at a different pace. Which i have to keep telling myself as well. Im very busy so a lot of my food choices are not good. thats what i have to work on. I come on MFP for support. the fact that you are frustrated just shows your determination. Keep up the good work!:flowerforyou:
  • Bjwurtz1128
    Bjwurtz1128 Posts: 26
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    I usely dont post on here, but I read this forum daily for inspiration. I to have been fustrated more then once, and was ready to throw in the towl. A dear friend of mine told me recently to think of it this way, " 16 pounds is the equlivent of 2 gallons of water.So... carry around 2 gallons of water around with you all day long and see how tired you get.. " .. made me think... hmmm 16pounds is a lot, I Still have a LONG way to go. but cant wait to get rid of this 12 gallons of water im carrying around now..LOL....; Keep up the good work...
  • wxchaser
    wxchaser Posts: 178
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    You are doing really well! No matter what your goals are, you are down 16 lbs from where you started, and that is an achievement in itself.

    Just remember, if you stay focused you CAN and WILL keep going. It may help you to set up a reward system with mini goals and a corresponding reward every 10 lbs or so to keep yourself motivated. Since you are a goal-oriented person, it will give you checkpoins along the way to your ultimate goal.

    I know you can do it. Be strong!

    I have been doing that. I just managed to go 40 days without sweets, and that was a huge accomplishment by itself. I just don't know what the reward would be. I have a goal this month to go to the gym/work out every day, and so far so good. I just really wish I was seeing more results. That's the problem. I feel like I'm not going anywhere.

    I have a friend who is on MFP and has lost 76 lbs in 10 months. She sets small goals for herself and rewards herself once she meets those goals. Her rewards are things like a pedicure or a facial. She rewards herself with things other than food. She plans to rent an exotic car for the day when she reaches her 100 lb mark.

    The exotic car is right up my alley!! I think I'm gonna make that my 50lb goal!
  • wxchaser
    wxchaser Posts: 178
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    I swear I am in the same boat as you are. I can write this same email word for word...I have started watching what I eat and exercising in January and I am not seeing the results that I thought that I would have achieved by now.

    But please, please, please hang in there...keep up your good work. It will eventually click and happen...that is what I keep telling myself. I will send a friend request and perhaps we can muddle through this together. :smile:

    That would be awesome!
  • wxchaser
    wxchaser Posts: 178
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    How many calories do you eat and do you eat back your exercise calories? Sometimes not eating enough is a problem for some people. Your body really needs to find that happy medium of what calories are the right amount for weight loss and then make sure you eat back your workout calories in order to maintain energy. Some months I lose only a pound or two...but thats a loss and thats good! MFP only recommends losing a pound a week so it sounds like you are right on track!

    I set a goal of 1500 calories per day and I almost always manage to eat back my calories, with a few exceptions. I guess I might still be looking for that happy medium. I've been trying to read up on dieting and weight loss as much as possible. So far, the Mayo Clinic has had the best information and that's where I got the 1500 calories from.

    I've also been having a lot of fluctuations with my weight, and that's what REALLY driving me up the wall. I think that more than anything has lead to so much discouragement.

    I'm under specialist weight management within the NHS. I'm 240lbs and I eat 1500 per day. My dietitians says NOT to eat exercise calories back (until I'm closer to goal). Just to eat a couple of hundred if I'm hungry enough for them. It worked really well for me. Working out 5-6 days a week and eating 1500 had me loosing 2-3lb a week. Maybe try this? Apparantly its safer to have bigger deficits when your quite overweight. I was dubious about this info so have had 3 dietitians confirm it. Worth a try I reckon. X

    That's what I read on the Mayo Clinic website. I'm trying to do that, but sometimes I just eat like hell during the day so I'm working out to fix it by the end of the night. Maybe that's my problem...?
  • wxchaser
    wxchaser Posts: 178
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    I am confused - 1st you state you haven't eaten any sugar and now binging on chocolate. I totally get the binging in chocolate, but don't you think that binging might be a downfall? Unfortunately, it sounds like you are relying on food to help your pain. I get that too. However, this might be part of the reason for being overweight and not being able to stick to a healthy regiment. This is a LIFE LONG JOURNEY. Slow and steady! Yes frustrating, yes oftentimes dissapointing, but you also have to be honest with yourself as well. It sounds like you are pigging out and then whining that you don't understand why you are not losing....

    Yes, food is my coping mechanism, but as of late, I've been seeing a therapist about it and that's helped. She's shown me better ways of coping, but when you lose a friend suddenly, that all gets lost for a time. I binged for 3 days straight after I found out but after that binging, I headed straight back to the gym and I've been going for the past few days straight. That's helped me cope even more, and I'm actually happier when I walk out of the gym than when I walked in.

    The 40 days thing was for Lent, BTW.
  • wxchaser
    wxchaser Posts: 178
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    You've gotten a lot of good advice here.
    You can do this, you just need to keep working at it.
    Remember plateau's are EVERYONE'S nightmare.
    You might want to think of this a a really tough class.
    You either have to work through it - or you will have to repeat it.
    You don't want to repeat it. :-)
    Wishing you the best from Minnesota

    LOL! It's like my Intermediate Meteorology class that I'm taking right now. It's a B***H of a class, and the last thing I wanna do is retake it, so I'm studying like it's going out of style, sometimes staying up till 5am to get things done. That's actually a great way of thinking about losing weight.

    Thanks for the insight!
  • amymimi12
    amymimi12 Posts: 51 Member
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    Totally in the same boat - 16 lbs in almost 4 months. It is frustrating to not see the results right away - I'm addicted to instant gratification. But like others have said, I have to stop thinking about only the weight. I'm down a pant size, I can go up stairs and not get as out of breath, my knees don't hurt quite as much as before, and I generally just feel better because I'm taking care of myself for a change. I'm trying to take this as a lesson in patience. The days are going to pass anyway, so each one can (slowly) get me closer to my goal or further away from it. Don't give up, we'll get there eventually! Think tortoise and hare or something like that :wink:
  • ski0721
    ski0721 Posts: 109 Member
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    Great reply helenoftroy01!! :flowerforyou:
  • nannabannana
    nannabannana Posts: 787
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    bump I am a lot older than you, but I do share your past and present experiences. I have kept a personal journal for the last 30 yrs. I would put everything but my weight in it?. Now I plan my meals at least 3 days in advance and in a pinch I grab frozen cut up chicken and mix it in with some vegs to stir fry .Qt. size freezer bags with 1/2 lb chicken feeds me and my hungry husband RECIPES...RECIPES..You must re-do all of the old ones..Journal your mood, your weight, your meals in a written journal then go back and put the lost weight days in RED PEN...I do that with personal prayer request also. If you want you may friend me. I love MFP.
  • buyer225
    buyer225 Posts: 17 Member
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    The best way to lose weight and keep it off is 05 to 1 lb per week. 16 lbs in 4 weeks is closer to 1 per week. Nothing wrong with that. Pick up 16 lbs of something. Then you'll see how much it really is. We all want to lose fast. Especially those of us with a lot to lose but lose it fast and put it back on faster. Slow and steady is the best way.
  • nmquinn
    nmquinn Posts: 2
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    Thank you so much for this piece of advice. I'm the type, that if I don't see instant results, I give up or make excuses. But if I focus on reaching goals that are not related to the results on the scale, THAT is something that is compleltely under my control.
  • Skinny_Kitty
    Skinny_Kitty Posts: 136 Member
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    I totally feel you! I;ve been doing this hard core since Jan and I've only lost 4lbs! I think I'm going to throw out the scale as all its doing is frustarting me!
  • tlowden1
    tlowden1 Posts: 5
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    Sometimes all it takes is mixing up your workouts and eating a little more calories (the good kinds, not the bad ones) and then your body will start to be challenged again. Sometimes your body stops producing because it's used to the workouts. I know that was the case for me for a while.

    Trust me, I'm exactly like you when it comes to wanting things to happen fast, especially if I see them happening to other people who aren't putting in the work I am. You just have to trust that you are making the healthy choices for you, and that your body will do what you're wanting it to.

    Keep your head up!
  • SusanLovesToEat
    SusanLovesToEat Posts: 218 Member
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    CONGRATULATIONS ON THE 16 POUNDS LOST!

    Imagine, in 4 more months it will be 32 then 64...

    You are in this for the long haul and its really hard to keep up the exercise and lose the weight. It hard to choose a different way to live and eat and 1 pound a week is the way to do this and keep the weight off for life.

    Just think, the time will pass anyway and in 24 months you'll be fitter than you ever though you could be and healthier because of the new way you eat and more confident not because of how you look but because you would have done this thing you never thought you could do one week at a time.
  • malu8
    malu8 Posts: 6 Member
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    Omg, reading your post was like reading about myself! Ive been with MFP for 5 months and the same thing has happend i try sooo hard, eating 1200 calories a day walking, hiking, 30 day shred and only 12 pounds lost i have all but given up in the passed 2 weeks. I am 48 years old last week i went for some test to see if i had any medical problems for why im not lossing weight but the test came back all normal. I know this was not motavating im sorry. I know your frustation. Can i friend you mabe we can help each other.
  • silkysly
    silkysly Posts: 701 Member
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    I’m not trying to be mean, but your diet isn’t very healthy…, at all. It’s not about staying under a certain caloric number, it’s about living healthy. Sorry…
  • jennys11
    jennys11 Posts: 118 Member
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    Try reading this: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/512956-tdee-what-is-it-and-why-you-should-not-eat-below-your-bmr
  • dancin2011
    dancin2011 Posts: 92 Member
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    I’m not trying to be mean, but your diet isn’t very healthy…, at all. It’s not about staying under a certain caloric number, it’s about living healthy. Sorry…

    I was thinking the same thing and was wondering if anyone else had taken a look before replying. OP, you are doing well staying in your calories but pay attention to WHAT you are eating as well. I just see a lot of chocolate, pop tarts, pastries, lattes, chips, cookies, fried food, fast food, etc. No fruits or vegetables. There is nothing wrong with eating the things in your diary, but it shouldn't be what your total diet consists of. I highly recommend replacing some of your meals and snacks with fruits, vegetables, yogurts, proteins, etc. Good luck

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