Attraction

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Luc245
Luc245 Posts: 73
in Motivation and Support
Hey so I'm getting pretty close to my goal weight and I've seen a lot of fat come off. I've been losing weight for myself so that I am healthy and because I love the way I look when I have a flat stomach and I can see muscle. I get excited when the pounds come off and I like to tell people. Recently I've talked to a few women (including an ex) who tell me that they are more attracted to larger men and that worries me a little. I really want to be in the healthy range but I also want a girlfriend in the future and I really hope that I'm not hurting my chances in the future. Will I become less attractive to some people as I lose fat? I'm not trying to become super skinny I just want to be around the middle of my healthy range.

Thank you for any insights :) motivation is harder to have when people tell me they prefer me fatter :/

Replies

  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    I personally prefer lean men. I prefer healthy. :-)

    You may become less attractive to some people, but then more attractive to others.

    Out of curiosity: is your ex overweight?
  • njean888
    njean888 Posts: 399 Member
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    I prefer lean men with some muscles, not a body builder. Just a man that looks like he works out. Besides you have to aim for what you like, its your body.
  • Toxictwist
    Toxictwist Posts: 274
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    healthy/in shape men are my thing. :)
  • Luc245
    Luc245 Posts: 73
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    I personally prefer lean men. I prefer healthy. :-)

    You may become less attractive to some people, but then more attractive to others.

    Out of curiosity: is your ex overweight?

    Thank you for your reply :)

    No my ex is super thin no matter what she eats, she's always trying to gain weight.
  • Nicoleo1
    Nicoleo1 Posts: 159 Member
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    Well, personally I think alive men are the hottest. If you trim down now and take care of it you will remain healthy longer... But truely, I love men with flat bellies... doesn't have to be 6 pack, but firm is good.
  • elzettel
    elzettel Posts: 256
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    I prefer confident men and someone comfortable in their own skin. It is one of my favorite qualities that attracted me to my hubby!
  • ZugTheMegasaurus
    ZugTheMegasaurus Posts: 801 Member
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    Will I become less attractive to some people as I lose fat? I'm not trying to become super skinny I just want to be around the middle of my healthy range.

    Will you become less attractive to SOME people? Yeah, definitely. But you're never going to be in a place where EVERYONE thinks you're attractive. Some do, some don't. Get yourself to a place that you're happy with, and then go find the people who like it too.
  • McMommyx3
    McMommyx3 Posts: 19
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    I prefer confident men and someone comfortable in their own skin. It is one of my favorite qualities that attracted me to my hubby!

    ^^this^^ CONFIDENCE, fake it til you make it, if you have to ;)
  • Jen32285
    Jen32285 Posts: 281 Member
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    I'd prefer a guy that's in shape and takes care of themselves.
  • Daisy_Cutter
    Daisy_Cutter Posts: 774
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    I've been attracted to all types - skinny, muscular, heavy.... it's who you are that is attractive. You'll find someone who loves you for you. Figure out what you find ideal for you and go with it. You'll find a hottie, no doubt!
  • Peta22
    Peta22 Posts: 377 Member
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    What everyone else said :) ... Everyone has different tastes (eg: I don't fing Brad Pitt, Ryan Renolds or half the so called 'heart throbs' attractive) so just focus on what YOU want to be. When your happy with that then everything else will fall into place!
  • Luc245
    Luc245 Posts: 73
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    Thank you everyone :) that makes a lot of sense and I feel a lot better.
  • kiminikimkim
    kiminikimkim Posts: 746 Member
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    Unless your goal is to attract your ex back into a relationship, stop worrying about what those women are thinking.

    A healthy body always wins in the end, you might get a hotter girlfriend too.
  • ShalisaClam
    ShalisaClam Posts: 190
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    You are a good looking guy and if you're fit & healthy, will have no trouble finding a lady. Everyone likes different things. Some women like bigger guys, some like rail-thin, some like muscled up. You are unique! :smile:
  • macnotes
    macnotes Posts: 210 Member
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    I agree with Kiminikimkim. your ex might be trying to control you like I would assume she might have done in the past? A changing YOU might indicate to her that you're moving forward. Her comment of wanting you to be fatter just seems bizarre.

    For me, I like a healthy man who cares about his body and isn't afraid to join me in any activity I choose to do that day. The healthy skin, the glow a person exudes when they are taking care of themselves is totally attractive.

    Heck, if you get right down to it, if you think about just the physiological part of it, a man that can have the energy to hunt me some food (veggies), build me a nice warm fire AND give me a massage is totally attractive because that means he'll be a good baby maker. Or at least be good at practicing :D
  • RoanneRed
    RoanneRed Posts: 429 Member
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    Might be worth clarifying if they mean 'larger' in terms of fatter or more muscle bulk.
  • FlyeredUp
    FlyeredUp Posts: 663 Member
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    Hey so I'm getting pretty close to my goal weight and I've seen a lot of fat come off. I've been losing weight for myself so that I am healthy and because I love the way I look when I have a flat stomach and I can see muscle. I get excited when the pounds come off and I like to tell people. Recently I've talked to a few women (including an ex) who tell me that they are more attracted to larger men and that worries me a little. I really want to be in the healthy range but I also want a girlfriend in the future and I really hope that I'm not hurting my chances in the future. Will I become less attractive to some people as I lose fat? I'm not trying to become super skinny I just want to be around the middle of my healthy range.

    Thank you for any insights :) motivation is harder to have when people tell me they prefer me fatter :/
    The only people who will tell you that are people who do not want you to succeed. ( I heard similar comments over the last 13 months) Do not listen to them, keep going and stay focused on your goal and try to look the way you want to look because women (like men) are attracted to different body types. But I think the fit look you are talking about is pretty popular with the ladies. So acheive your goals, treat the lucky lady like a princess, make sure you know how to read a label, smell good and forget about the ex and you wont have any trouble with the ladies.
  • Luc245
    Luc245 Posts: 73
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    I agree with Kiminikimkim. your ex might be trying to control you like I would assume she might have done in the past? A changing YOU might indicate to her that you're moving forward. Her comment of wanting you to be fatter just seems bizarre.

    For me, I like a healthy man who cares about his body and isn't afraid to join me in any activity I choose to do that day. The healthy skin, the glow a person exudes when they are taking care of themselves is totally attractive.

    Heck, if you get right down to it, if you think about just the physiological part of it, a man that can have the energy to hunt me some food (veggies), build me a nice warm fire AND give me a massage is totally attractive because that means he'll be a good baby maker. Or at least be good at practicing :D

    haha macnotes, that's an awesome way to look at it. My ex is married now. We have never had bad feelings for each other, there was never anything wrong in the relationship, and she wasn't controlling, just telling me her honest feelings so that's why it made a difference in my mind. You're right though, it shouldn't matter. I suppose weight doesn't matter, there will always be someone who is attracted to whatever.

    I like being able to go on hikes and play sports without getting too tired and you're right I'm sure that will go a long way to attracting someone. Also the baby making practice is very enjoyable. You've given me new insight! Thank you very much!

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