new to program in need of supports

tryleigh

I am a mother to 2 boys, 5 and 6, and a 12 year old girl; about to start a divorce, have lost almost all material possessions; I am in need to start over and change something for the better, the way I feel and look! I am 31 and scared, I have 100 pounds to lose to be at my ideal weight; I know this will be a struggle, but I have to start somewhere and would welcome any kind of help. My struggles are motivation and creativity; I have a hard time thinking of healthy, good tasting meals, and I tend to give up too easily. If anyone out there thinks that may be able to help, please feel free to add me, I would love to talk with you! I started this program because my boyfriend has started his journey to a healthier life, and now I want too as well

ARMom8251

Welcome, and this site is super wonderful. I have been on here for a little over a year, and the support I have gotten from here has been amazing. I wish you the best of luck. It has to be something you want for yourself, and it is hard work so giving up is not an option if you want to succeed. You are strong enough to do this you just have to be willing to put in the hard work. It is a trial and error kind of thing....you have to find what works best for you and your body. There is a million things people do different and each one is exactly right for them. I don't like the you must do it this way saying because you must do it the way that works for you. There are of course base guides that are a pretty basic good idea to follow, but the rest is what works for you. Again I wish you the best of luck....I know how hard it is with a family(four kids right here) and a full time job, but you must make time for yourself....good luck

LovingLisa2012

start with just cutting back on portions ... then you can find subs for things
or find ways to add in veggies etc ..

for spag. use ground turkey and add in spinach or any other veggie you like
or use half ground meat and half turkey

try to limit or avoid fried foods .. try baked chips if you really want chips, or at the very least weigh out a portion

but my best advice is get you a food scale and measuring cups (if you dont already have)
and feel free to add me

STrooper

I was 31 when I went through my divorce. I didn't think I was going to survive. I was overweight (~25 pounds) from flying around the country and eating too well when i should have been at home. She told me she was having an affair during our vacation over the fourth of July. Four months later, after it was clear that she was not going to let this kid go (he was 24 and in college) and she was too afraid to try to work things out with me, I suggested that it was time for her to go and sort this out. It was something she wanted to do anyway so he could move in with her. The first Thanksgiving and Christmas alone were not pleasant times.

I still had my house, I had time with my son (joint custody), but the house was devoid of a lot of furniture (she took a bunch with her). I slept on the couch in my living room (she took the bed and so the master bedroom was virtually empty for about 1 year) Eating (healthy) was and can be a challenge under these types of circumstances. Yet, the fact that I had to prepare meals for my son 3-4 nights a week and try to maintain his health had me look at what I was feeding him and myself. Keep in mind that what you do for your children (around food) is what you do for yourself.

To keep my sanity, I walked. Mostly at lunchtime to help deal with the crushing feeling of a dissolving marriage and all the self-image destruction that involved. On the evenings and Sundays when my son was with my soon to be ex-wife, I took the effort to walk at least 2-miles on a couple of different paths, streets, etc that I had chosen, just to get some activity. I generally didn't over eat because I didn't have much appetite.

The first 6 months were the worst. But one Sunday in mid-April, 6 months after we had separated, I was walking through the woods on a trail around a lake in a heavy drizzle when I realized I was going to survive. The stress and the walking had me lose 40 pounds before I regained some and didn't look so underweight (weight training). I took up new sports (snow skiing and mountain climbing) once I was getting back into shape.

I also journalled quite a bit. I still have those journals where I expressed my thoughts, my fears, dreams lost and eventually dreams rebuilt. It might be useful to have someone to team with in weight reduction, but you really have to do it for yourself and no one else. I didn't lose weight to get my ex-wife back. In my case, I did it for my self and to feel good about who I was and what I might have to offer to someone else one day as I put my sense on self-worth back together.

jenslife82

Great that u put yourself out there you're a good person going thru a lot. I absolutely love this site and the people on it with similar goals. You'll get there. Some one posted at one point "it's surprisingly simple to lose weight. You just need to get your brain to understand that, then your body will do the work for you." I loved it. We all know what we need to do, but like you said it takes motivation and creativity. Oh one more thing, I say it over and over every day: I won't give up what I want most for what I want now." glad you found some friends on here. I'm here if you need me