Goals vs. DEADLINES

Qatsi

How many of you have set DEADLINES for reaching your goals? Not just a weight loss goal, but a time limit in which to accomplish it?

When I started here back in November, I set a goal of getting back to my high school weight by the time I turned 50. Basically, I wanted to drop 110 pounds in ten months. I got off to a quick start (mainly losing water retension), but by the end of the second month I was no longer keeping pace with that timetable, and by the third month I realized I would have some serious catching up to do to get back on track.

In the past, I would have looked at this as a failed effort and given up in frustration. This time, though, I realized I had two other choices. I could redouble my efforts and try to get back on track to meet this arbitrary deadline I'd set for myself (and probably make myself miserable in the process). Or, I could accept the progress I HAVE made as a victory and reassess my goals.

Today I'm 24 weeks into this and have now dropped 40 pounds. I'm 20 pounds behind the pace I'd set for myself back in November, but I can live with that. I still have my goals set to drop two pounds a week, but if I don't quite get there I don't beat myself up over it.

I'm not saying deadlines are bad. I'm a software developer and have to deal with them all the time. But sometimes things take longer than planned. I choose not to stress out about it. I know if I stay on this road, I WILL get to my destination.

So what do you think? Healthy attitude, or cop out?

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I'm against weight loss deadlines- 100%. When I was at the beginning of my weight loss/lifestyle change (I hate, HATE the word "dieting" because that implies that it's only temporary. The way I live my life now will never go back to how it used to be. People don't get that. But anyways....) I used to think- "I want to lose all of this weight by June for bathing suit season." After really getting into my workout routine and new healthier eating habits, I realized that it was crazy what I was telling myself about time limits.

Deadlines aren't reasonable, and they almost always have negative affects on attitude and motivation. If you think about it- How long did it take to gain all of that weight? For me, it was over 4 years of college. So why was I expecting it to all go away before summer? It was unreasonable. Sure I could've stopped eating for three months, but then I would've gained it all back as soon as I started eating again.

110 pounds in 10 months isn't a healthy loss rate. My rate of weight loss has been steady at 1.5-2 lbs a week (starting to be about .5 a week, I've been weight training), which is a healthy rate- equaling the most of 8 lbs a month, which is 96 lbs in a year (I by no means have that much to lose- nor would I keep that pace for an entire year- just proving a point.)

Initially, you see a large weight loss because you've made a huge life style change, and you're losing the "extra" weight- water weight, etc. But once your body gets used to the new "life" it has, it's bound to balance out somewhere.

Setting a deadline is not only going to discourage you, it could throw your entire plan out of whack if you don't meet that date- You'll think "well I couldn't do what I was supposed to do, might as well give up". I don't have the perfect, lean body I wanted to have by summer yet, but the changes I have seen have been awesome- and I'm not giving up. I realized that I need to do it the healthy way so that the weight stays off and my lifestyle stays clean and healthy.

You can set goals for yourself, but deadlines are bad news. Whenever I start to think- "Man, June is getting close, I need to get my butt in gear", I then tell myself- "It took me 4 years (at least) to put this weight on, it's not going to go away in 3 months."

Qatsi

I can see a few cases when a person could be dealing with an actual deadline - for example, trying to fit into your grandmother's wedding dress in time for the big day.

But for most of us, attaching a time limit to a specific weight loss goal is an arbitrary thing. And admittedly, I fell into that mindset when I started this journey. (I had decided I wanted to go to Hawaii for my 50th birthday, and that I needed to get my weight down so I wouldn't be embarrassed to take my shirt off at the beach.)

Once I discovered that the timeline I'd set for myself was not realistic, I had to change the way I thought about this process in order for me to not get discouraged and quit out of frustration.

I'm happy with the progress I've made so far, even if it's at a less ambitious pace than I'd originally envisioned. Does that make me a failure? Does it mean I'm not trying hard enough? I don't think so. If it takes me an extra few months to hit my goal, and I can do it while developing good sustainable habits along the way, I'm better off in the long run.

As far as the Hawaii trip goes - I haven't decided yet whether to keep it as a birthday present, or to make it a reward for reaching my goal (however long it takes).