Lost Motivation

forest0spirit555

Hello Everyone,
I have been struggling for about a month now. Things were going great and I was losing so much weight and just feeling incredibly fit but then I hit a slump which I cant get out of. I am unsure of how it started, but at some point I just kinda decided that eating what I wanted when I wanted was much more important than anything else.

I stopped logging truthfully, I was eating way too many calories, feeling guilty about it, yet not making the changes. I think part of it was just that I got fed up with watching every little bite and also that I had to say no to sweets (I have a humongous sweet tooth and knew that as soon as I said yes to a sweet thing that I would lose control, which I did.) But I also think it may be psychological. I think that a times I have been quite literally eating my feelings and whats worse is I will eat when I am not hungry just to stuff myself some more.

The eating my feelings cropped up shortly after getting compliments for my weightloss. As people began to notice I think I wanted to go back to my "normal" because all the attention I was getting was making me very uncomfortable. I know that may sound crazy and in some respects it is. I dont know how to get comfortable with my body and keep on pushing it to reach my ultimate goal....

Whats worse is my boyfriend is dissappointed that I have stopped trying. He doesnt believe I am fat or anything but he was looking forward to seeing the final results after having watched myself make serious progress...So in addition to letting myself down, I feel like Ive let him down too

Any words of kindness would really help. Thanks

forest0spirit555

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forest0spirit555

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forest0spirit555

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Newhampshireboy

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are you worried that the attention you were getting from individuals when you lost the weight was superficial.

lillebanon

I think we have all been there. Maybe if you didn't feel like you were depriving yourself all the time, it would be easier to stick with? You may want to come check out the "Eat More to Weigh Less" group...

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/groups/home/3817-eat-more-to-weigh-less

Josephina57

I'm sorry you feel like you have lost your motivation. Ask yourself this question; do I want to be healthy or not? Forget about what happened before and start fresh today. Take it one day at a time. Believe me, I know it is easier said than done, but I have faith in you. You can do it.

new2locs

Well you've taken the first step by admitting a lot of things about your habits & how you feel about them, And it looks as though by admitting those things you are ready to get back on the wagon. As long as you know you have to do this one day at a time I'm sure you can be successful. Also let me just add you look good at the size you are now to me!

Now back to logging daily & eating those exercise calories!!!!

forest0spirit555

I'm sorry you feel like you have lost your motivation. Ask yourself this question; do I want to be healthy or not? Forget about what happened before and start fresh today. Take it one day at a time. Believe me, I know it is easier said than done, but I have faith in you. You can do it.

thank you.

Asil02

I am sorry that you feel so uncomfortable with the compliments and attention. I actually understand it. I have had that same thing before. I am not sure why it happens. One would think the accolades would be encouraging! Instead it does the opposite. One thing you may want to do when people compliment you is just to say thank you and move on. Try to not focus on it. Go on to think about what you need to do to get on track and stay there. Start focusing on your health and not what the "end result" is gong to be.

It might be that you are also feeling pressure from your boyfriend. Tell him you need to not worry with what he wants but what you need.

I do know for myself, that I have a hard time completing things I start. I recently decided that I am not to begin anything until I am done with the projects I have already started. One thing I recently accomplished is getting my Associates Degree! I am 46 years old and it felt great to finally get that done! WOO WHOO!!

As I tell most everyone (especially myself), be gentle with yourself. Remind yourself that you are worth the effort and accolades. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get and stay healthy and be as happy as you can be. Don't focus on the WL just focus on being healthy and happy.

dorkboi

Keep your chin up. We have all fallen many many times. What's important is that you have recognized it! Get back on track and know that you aren't alone in this journey!!

madelonism

its sad, i mean ive given up and gained again many times, but I was a preteen. and i want people to know about my loss. I tell them all the time haha you need to do this for you. not anyone else. if you dont like compliments well ignore them. i ignore insults on a daily basis (i just smile and nod) but i would really incorage accepting the positive reinforcement.

forest0spirit555

Well you've taken the first step by admitting a lot of things about your habits & how you feel about them, And it looks as though by admitting those things you are ready to get back on the wagon. As long as you know you have to do this one day at a time I'm sure you can be successful. Also let me just add you look good at the size you are now to me!

Now back to logging daily & eating those exercise calories!!!!

thank you. by no means am I "big" and according to BMI im at the heavier side of what is still healthy I just wish I could get toward the lighter/average side

forest0spirit555

I am sorry that you feel so uncomfortable with the compliments and attention. I actually understand it. I have had that same thing before. I am not sure why it happens. One would think the accolades would be encouraging! Instead it does the opposite. One thing you may want to do when people compliment you is just to say thank you and move on. Try to not focus on it. Go on to think about what you need to do to get on track and stay there. Start focusing on your health and not what the "end result" is gong to be.

It might be that you are also feeling pressure from your boyfriend. Tell him you need to not worry with what he wants but what you need.

I do know for myself, that I have a hard time completing things I start. I recently decided that I am not to begin anything until I am done with the projects I have already started. One thing I recently accomplished is getting my Associates Degree! I am 46 years old and it felt great to finally get that done! WOO WHOO!!

As I tell most everyone (especially myself), be gentle with yourself. Remind yourself that you are worth the effort and accolades. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get and stay healthy and be as happy as you can be. Don't focus on the WL just focus on being healthy and happy.

wow. thank you. that just makes so much sense. I think I do have that problem as well. Especially with this.

lisa46219

I know how you feel. I am the same way- once people start to notice, I get uncomfortable and regress back to my old eatting patterns. For me, I have to focus on why I am doing this... for me, to feel better, to be more comfortable in my own skin. There is nothing that says you can't take a bread. You've already lost a signifigant amount, and if you are feeling deprived of foods, put it on hold. Increase your caloric intake to the maintence amount for a couple of weeks and get your focus back. Don;t get me wrong, I'm not suggesting you forget the whole thing, just maintain what you have lost. Don't let your current mood ruin all the work you have done so far- it will be much harder if you have to start over.

So- let's talk about the sweet tooth (which I also have). I have found eatting a lot of fruit has really helped. I try to have at least 3 fruit servings a day. The best for me is grapes and strawberries. And I will add Cool Whip on occassion. I also had read a post where someone was putting 2 tablespoons of light Cool Whip (frozen) between 2 graham crackers as a substitution for ice cream. This has become my favorite treat. But let's not forget, you can have a cookie, cake, candy or any other item as long as you fit them into your plan. I was always the one who couldn't eat a cookie. It was the package because I may never get to eat another one again! It has been a struggle, and I completely stayed away from most sweets in the beginning, but I am slowly adding them into my plan since they will always be there... calling my name!

Hope this helps... and good luck!

leslisa

Sort of freaks me out to have the attention, too. (recent post about people saying things like "you're getting to skinny" might be insiteful for you). I mean I want people to notice, but I'm sort of a loner and not very tactful so I never know what to say to them. Obviously I say thank you, it's a compliment and most of the time I feel as though it is unearned because I haven't yet hit my goal.

As far as the sweet tooth, my son (who is also working on loosing weight) and I have one, too. We've found that trying to ignore it makes it about 40 times worse so we use some workarounds instead.

First are sweet drinks. Favs are Crystal Light (10 cals) and if I'm at a party or something, I take some Diet Dr. Pepper with me so I'm not drinking water while everyone else is downing beer and soda. CL can be carried in my purse and poured into water when I'm having an all consuming moment. Don't drink it all the time, but the 3 or so times a week I have it really helps me feel like I'm satisfying my craving. CL is low/no sodium, too.

Second, whipped cream in a can. You can get the 15 cal for 2 tbsp or the 5 cal for 2 tbsp. It works well on strawberries, sugar free ice cream (90 cal 1/2 cup), sugar free sherbert (70 cal 1/2 cup), and sugar free jello (5 cal serv). Better yet, put the strawberries in the sugar free jello and add a little whip. When I was a kid we only got whip cream at Xmas so to me this feels like a huge splurge.

Third. You can make really low cal milk shakes (1 cup = 180 cals) every blue moon for fun and add above mentioned whipped cream and a cherry to feel like you are really splurging without blowing your cals for the day. Silly thing for me, but I have ultra skinny glasses I use so to me it looks like I'm getting more than I'm getting.

Fourth. Coffee light frappacino at Starbucks. The small one is only 90 cals and with the lo cal whip it's like heaven in a plastic cup.

When I'm really craving sweets (Usually when I'm PMSing), and I deny myself, then I go nuts after just a bite.

You can do this. We are pulling for you!!!

chica23GK

I can relate. I once lost 60 lbs but the compliments aggravated me - it was like people liked me better or approved of me only because I was slim; it was as if I was considered a "better" person because I had a "better" body. I finally came to realize that they weren't saying any such thing - that judgement was coming from within myself! I thought I'd be a "better" person because I hated the fat me. Self-acceptance. We need to love & care for ourselves not because we look good but enough TO look good - enough to get healthy. Weight-loss is ultimately about our health because excess weight is so harmful. I'm older now and have regained that 60 lbs plus and I'm here (MFP and "dieting" again) because I see what excess weight does to a body over time - it causes diabetes, high blood pressure & high cholesterol, it can lead to arthritis (knee/back pain), etc. When we're young, we think who cares about when we're old as if life is over anyway. But these ailments occur in 40 & 50 yr olds, which I once thought was old. But it's not old. Don't wait to get hit with one of these health issues. Every day we choose to stay on the path of good health, we are benefitting in the present as well as investing in our future good health. Forget the past - there are no failures, only mistakes which are meant to learn from. Look back only long enough to learn from it and then go forward - get back on track & be good to yourself. You deserve goodness - genuine goodness, not the false stuff wrapped in pretty, deceptive, tempting packages

chica23GK

Oh & about the sweet tooth - I have one too and protein helps. Boost protein just b4 PMS hits and during the cycle; it helps curb sweet tooth - it helped me

lisa46219

Oh & about the sweet tooth - I have one too and protein helps. Boost protein just b4 PMS hits and during the cycle; it helps curb sweet tooth - it helped me

I am soooo trying this! Thanks for the tip!

leslisa

One thing I recently accomplished is getting my Associates Degree! I am 46 years old and it felt great to finally get that done! WOO WHOO!!

Oh wow!!! You go girl. This is awesome (and difficult to do)

Asil02

Oh wow!!! You go girl. This is awesome (and difficult to do)

THANKS! I appreciate it!