my own worst enemy

SandyQ229
SandyQ229 Posts: 153 Member
edited December 18 in Motivation and Support
hello,

so i know i am my own worst enemy. i am trying to get over this, but for some reason (and i know its cause im scared which is stupid) when i start to have any success in losing weight i stop what i have been doing and working out seems to be what always goes. and i actually enjoy working out but i always stop. i have been doing well up until this point. 18 pounds down since january when i recommitted myself..and its weird i have 7 pounds to go till 25 pounds lost which is my goal for May 29th ..and for the last week or so i just stopped my working out... i know it seems like i dont' want to do this but i do. im just frightened. and this is the first time i have ever admitted that out loud. it seems like i am scared of succeeding and seeing what i have the potential to become and to accomplish. the more weight i lose the more scared i become and the more i dig my heels into the ground and halt my own success.. anyone else ever experience this?? if you did how did you get past it. i would love to be able to get past this and move forward with my weightloss but the barrier i have put up around myself and its a big barrier since i have 125 pounds left to lose till i hit my goal weight of 150.

any help or insite would be great!!

Thanks

Replies

  • mrseelmerfudd
    mrseelmerfudd Posts: 506 Member
    ive done this before. last year i lost a stone and a half then got sick and new i needed to get back to being healthy but i self sabbotaged and put all the weight back on. this time i have done much better, this site has helped a lot, and i have lots of things to aim for/targets. do you have anything coming up that you can say i would like to be x amount of lbs down for? i want a stone off by july as ive a few things on then!
  • SandyQ229
    SandyQ229 Posts: 153 Member
    thanks. yeah the 29th of May is my 31st birthday. i originally wanted to be down 50 but that is not happening lol but iset the 25 pound goal for then. its still doable..i need to get my butt back into this...
  • I am dealing with this right now myself. I was consistently losing 2.2lbs a week. Eating nothing but healthy and exercising 5 days a week. Right after my weigh in last Sunday, I decided, wow, I am doing so good I think it's time I treat myself and have a cheat day because I've been really really good. BIG mistake for me. 3 chicken wings turned into 9. 1 cheese danish turned into 2. Well you see where I'm going with this. Well the next day I decided to get back on track. Morning comes along and I go to the fridge to see what I want for breakfast and these pepperoni pepperettes are staring me right in the face (they have always been a weakness for me). I decide, ah well, what will it hurt, so I take 2. You'd think I would have been satisfied with just that, but nope, I go back and grab the rest and eat the 8 remainder in the package. I feel terrible about what I've just done and promise myself that I will be GOOD for the rest of the day, since I pretty much consumed all my calories in one sitting (and forget about the SODIUM, oy). Well lunch comes along and I find myself looking in the fridge once more. Ah ha, left over CHICKEN WINGS! 8 of them. I grab them and go sit at my desk and devour every single one of them LOOKING at my MFP diary and not caring that I just ruined EVERYTHING I worked so hard for. I feel horrible and sluggish the rest of the day. I look at my exercise bike and think, nah, I will do it tomorrow and be good for the rest of the week. Well let's just say that I haven't gotten on the thing ALL week until just yesterday. And because I slacked off so much, I could barely even do 30mins (when I USUALLY do 1 hour sessions). SO yeah, here I am, feeling absolutely terrible about everything I've done (and not done). I don't know WHY this is happening. Just a week or so ago, anyone who offered me even my most favourite cheat food, I would have had the willpower to say no thanks. But because of this ONE cheat day that I had, I'm not sure I could turn ANYthing down now that was offered to me. And the scale is showing that fact >.< Anyways, I just wanted you to know, you are NOT alone in this. And this probably wont be the last time we feel this way, but only thing we can do, is start over and keep on trying. Being in it for LIFE and well, we have alot of years left to make it happen! Hang in there girl, we WILL make it happen!!! *hugs*
  • chermike1
    chermike1 Posts: 12 Member
    I have my own theory on this topic because I two have been known to do this. Our body has alot of natural instincts built into us. We have all heard of starvation mode. I feel we are not crazy and we really do want this it is not in our natural mind controll, but I think It works like starvation mode. When your calorees go to low our bodys store back weight so we don't starve. I think when we start to drop off significant amounts of weight regardless of our calorees our brain has a built in defense (A different starvation mechanism and harder to controll) Our brain tells us to eat what it is losing (fat). You see our brain thinks it needs that fat store for fuel when we don't have enough calories and the more the fat the longer we will make it. I still battle this, but realizing that I am not crazy and that it is just anouther built in trigger for servival in midevil times makes it easier. I now recognise and understand my body more and when I start to feel this way I don't just do what my brain has told me. I try my hardest to work past it and the servival instinct usually stops in 2 days to a week and comes back again every so often. There is no data on this, but I refuse to believe we all are crazy and we all have pretty much multipule personalities. lol I am sure as the sky is blue this is a fact and we are all normal. (oh and same with the exercise our brain tells us to stop because it needs that fat you will burn for fuel.
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