How do you stay on track when you live with temptation?
AMH1031
Posts: 11
I need advice! My husband is a junk food junky just like me but I have tried so hard to start correcting my eating habits so I can start feeling good about my body and be a healthier me. I do so well when I am not at home but in the evenings and weekends I just can't watch him eat all the yummy desserts, fast food, etc. My question is how do I get him involved in a healthier lifestyle with me? He can also get in better shape and both of our families have a history of heart disease. He will make comments about wanting to lose weight but he doesn't want to work for it or give anything up. If getting him to join me doesn't work, what do you do to stay on track when people around you are pulling you down? I know I don't have to eat it but it is easier to say "just say no" than to actually say "no". 
I feel like food is a drug! I know where the problem is but I am not completely sure how to get away from it.
I feel like food is a drug! I know where the problem is but I am not completely sure how to get away from it. 0
Replies
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I have a husband and kids who love their sweets..my problem is my husband does this ALL the time and is still skinny!!!! I've asked him not to keep doing this-but he still brings it in the house. It makes my job to drop the weight alot harder. Its almost impossible to ignore..Oh and btw-he doesn't excersize either..so no motivation there either. Good Luck..curious to see ideas.0
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I would recommend if you buy the groceries....don't buy the junk food. He will have no choice but to eat what is good for both of you or go out and eat it but at least it won't be in front of you if you refuse to go. I had to look at this journey not as losing weight but as a journey back to being healthy otherwise your choice is to live out your life with lots of aches and pains and a slow death. This thought process has helped me stay determine and be the best example for those in my life especially my daughter.
Surround yourself with folks going on the same journey. They help you stay posititive and maybe once he sees the results in you, he will want to jump on the ride back to healthy with you. Also, train yourself to see the signs when someone is trying to get you off track. I've seen many do this and I've learned to say no to them with their activities such as going out to eat eveyry night. Talking you into skipping a workout, etc. This site has been wonderful and I've only been back a week with logging in everything. Everyone helps you stay determine and we are all wanting to live and be healthy.0 -
I do the shopping so if I don't want it in the house, its not in the house. I bought a bag of chips and he ate them but I never saw him. My husband is one that can eat anything and not gain weight so I know how you feel. Does he go out and just bring stuff home? Ask him for his support and ask that if he wants something like that to not bring it home or to eat it when you are not around. That it is not fair to you.0
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Dump him!
Just kidding, but I wonder if he would be kind enough to trade his home junkfood for convenience store junk food and eat it in the car. Doing that might even lead to him cutting down, and if not, at least you wouldn't have to see it.0 -
If he insists on eating the crunchy, salty, sweet snacks, then find a way to replace with better alternatives that provide the same effect.
As an example (one that has helped me with my snacking habits), rice cakes now come in Caramel and Chocolate varieties, and are quite satisfying as a snack. The effect is the same: sweet and crunchy, and the size helps me think that I'm getting more than I actually am.....0 -
I would ask for his support and if he can't give it up, designate a specific out of sight location to store his junk, clean out a cabinet or something, does he have an office or garage at home, designate that his junk food zone (that's what we did and it worked). I think if you can get it out of sight you can convince yourself it's out of reach. I do bring treats for the rest of my household home but I send the treats to their rooms (all adults no children) and that makes them not feel deprived but does not leave treats in "my kingdom" of the kitchen and main living room.0
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I have a husband and kids who love their sweets..my problem is my husband does this ALL the time and is still skinny!!!! I've asked him not to keep doing this-but he still brings it in the house. It makes my job to drop the weight alot harder. Its almost impossible to ignore..Oh and btw-he doesn't excersize either..so no motivation there either. Good Luck..curious to see ideas.
Same here - my OH can gorge himself on junk food until he's almost in a coma and still stay skinny as a beanpole! I will make a healthy dinner and have lots of fresh fruit in the house, he will eat all of that and within half an hour of dinner he will start in on the crisps, biscuits, chocolates etc etc while sitting on the sofa in front of the tv. I have no desire to join him because to be honest watching & listening to him gorge himself night after night isn't that pretty :ohwell: Love him to bits but o...m...g :noway:0 -
hello, its the same in my house, its full of donuts cookies crisps but i over came wanting them....once you say no it begins to feel ok. i know wot u mean.....i have to eat my salads when my house hold orders take-outs!!! but i feel sooo good when i haven't had any...all the best...keep up the will power x0
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Start tracking your calories on the site, honestly and accurately. Don't let anyone else see your diary if you don't want to, but never, ever cheat entering food into it. Once you start honestly examining what you eat and what it's costing you in calories, you may decide that the junk foods (which are giving you calories but no useful nutrition) simply don't fit in to your life any more. Or you'll find a way to fit them in with exercise and portion control.
A pound is 3,500 calories. Watch them add up as you eat the junk food. You'll find that a large bag of chips being worth an hour on the treadmill is a great incentive to get a bag of veggies instead. Or you'll spend that hour on the treadmill and the bag of chips will be worthwhile because it bought you some exercise.
Or you'll gain weight and you'll know EXACTLY why. And that may be enough to force a rethink.
This is a change for life. Temptation is part of life. You NEED to learn to deal with it.0 -
You don't need to say "no" all the time. Maybe say no to the quantities of it. It's not good to always resist temptations, you'll end up binging on them.
Do what you can to eat healthy as much as possible. Make room for extra food you cannot resist because your husband brings it home, either by cutting portions, or by working out to have some more calories available.
It's not that difficult to manage, as long as you're motivated to stay on track.
For example: when having McDonalds, I chose to only have a burger or 2, but no fries, no drink and no dessert. Or if my husband brings home some cakes, I only have one piece right then, and save another one for breakfast next day.
It's a question of organizing when to have what and how much.0 -
Can you ask him to help you by not having the junk food in the house? He has to be the one to decide to lose weight, but if you can show him that you really need him to do this for you, maybe he'll understand. Phrase it to where he's doing you a favor and supporting you. Maybe once the junk food is out of the house altogether, he'll see that it's not so hard and join you.
I know what you're going through. I have a four-year-old, and my mom keeps buying him candy and such. I had to tell her to just stop. He can have a few treats, but I certainly don't want him to pick up our bad eating habits. Certain foods are triggers for me, like Cheetos popcorn, so I don't even want it in the house.0 -
After I watched my husband eat a whole bag of cinnamon caramel corn in front of me, I wanted to bash his head in.
lol I wanted it sooooo bad! Popcorn was my downfall and one reason why I gained so much weight. Now, I don't have it in the house and THANK GOD, after seeing my progress he has finally joined me in this lifestyle and he doesn't buy that crap anymore.
I tell myself that I'm a stronger and healthier person each time I deny myself the opportunity to eat something that's not good for me. Yes, I do on occasion have treats but for the most part it's easier for me to avoid the stuff completely. If I do have a treat, it's a single serving that I purchase rather than a whole package. That or I make sure there are enough people around to finish it off so I'm not tempted to eat more.
Keep something low cal around to snack on while he's eating the bad stuff. For a while I bought caramel corn rice cakes but now I've graduated to chocolate chip crunch! They only have 50-60 cals each. I also keep cut up veggies in the frig. If you are TRULY hungry, they taste delicious.
Good luck and I hope your hubby joins you soon!0 -
Start tracking your calories on the site, honestly and accurately. Don't let anyone else see your diary if you don't want to, but never, ever cheat entering food into it. Once you start honestly examining what you eat and what it's costing you in calories, you may decide that the junk foods (which are giving you calories but no useful nutrition) simply don't fit in to your life any more. Or you'll find a way to fit them in with exercise and portion control.
A pound is 3,500 calories. Watch them add up as you eat the junk food. You'll find that a large bag of chips being worth an hour on the treadmill is a great incentive to get a bag of veggies instead. Or you'll spend that hour on the treadmill and the bag of chips will be worthwhile because it bought you some exercise.
Or you'll gain weight and you'll know EXACTLY why. And that may be enough to force a rethink.
This is a change for life. Temptation is part of life. You NEED to learn to deal with it.
This also helps me a lot. Not as much as I wish it did, but it definitely is in the back of my mind that if I eat it, I'm going to have to record it in my diary, and I always do, right down to a single breath mint.0 -
I do the shopping and have recently told him I won't buy anymore junk. One thing I used to do is buy a sweet that I did't like so I won't be tempted. I try to show him how eating healthy isn't all bad, you can still eat tasty foods. My 3 year old is so bad he most often than not refuses to eat dinner. He just wants junk food. I need to change my whole house to a healthy home. I guess it really is beyond just my husband eating unhealthy but I want to have a healthy active family. :happy:0
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I do the shopping and have recently told him I won't buy anymore junk. One thing I used to do is buy a sweet that I did't like so I won't be tempted. I try to show him how eating healthy isn't all bad, you can still eat tasty foods. My 3 year old is so bad he most often than not refuses to eat dinner. He just wants junk food. I need to change my whole house to a healthy home. I guess it really is beyond just my husband eating unhealthy but I want to have a healthy active family. :happy:
Well at least your three your old can't show up in the evening with his own junk food and eat it in front of you. Well, unless a grandma is involved!
As far as him not eating dinner, is there anything healthy he likes for dinner? You certainly aren't teaching him good habits by letting him skip dinner and go straight to dessert, but if he's hungry because he won't eat it even if he'll get nothing else that's not good for him either.0 -
In my house I was the junk food junky!
When I started changing my life I began top notice that my children and wife were not eating well either.
It has/is taking time to get the whole family eating healthy. But it is slowly moving in the right direction!
When you buy groceries, buy healthy foods. When you prepare meals, cook healthy. When you want a snack, make it a healthy one and offer to share.
It will take time, but if you keep your focus and dedication. It will slowly transfer to your loved ones!
Note: Was grocery shopping with my Son last weekend and he was checking out the sodium levels on different brands of bread. After his review he chose a multi-grain style bread. A year ago I could not even have whole wheat toast on the breakfast table for myself without him commenting about how he hated "brown" bread! :-)0 -
I just ask my partner to not bring junk treats home. I can deal with seeing him eat a pizza while I'm having a healthy meal but watching him eat biscuits etc was torture. Now he doesn't have them at home, or only buys treats for himself that he knows I don't like so won't be tempted to eat.0
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He has to want to make that change for himself, you can't force him. If it was me, and I was preparing dinner, I'd prepare whatever is healthy for me... if he wants something else, he can do the work himself. Instead someone will usually eat what you're having. Also, STOP buying junk food.0
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My husband and I have separate treats. As much as I want some of his chocolate, I don't take it because it's his, not mine. I incorporate sweets into my daily cals because I know I won't stop eating them.0
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You just have to decide what is more important to you. I don't have to eat the same junk every one else is. I am also not going to stop my underweight kids from getting the calories they need and keeping snacks away from them. My weight is my problem. I am showing them by my example how to have a balanced life. I still have pizza, brownies, ice cream, whatever. But I also don't have that all the time, and I eat a lot more lean meats a fresh fruits and veggies. Even my 4 and 6 year old are getting an understanding of how to balance the good and the bad. You just have to decide what you want and what you are going to eat. No need to change your husband.0
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I just figure out how many calories is in the treat and then figure out how many minutes it would be of the dreaded exercise. Once I know that I figure out if it's worth it.
For me, typically it isn't worth it. I want to lose weight and keep it off. I've commited to myself and won't cheat myself from this opportunity to look the way I've always wanted to.
I'm a bit single minded.0 -
If getting him to join me doesn't work, what do you do to stay on track when people around you are pulling you down? I know I don't have to eat it but it is easier to say "just say no" than to actually say "no". I feel like food is a drug! I know where the problem is but I am not completely sure how to get away from it.
He is not pulling you down. You are making the choices for you, unless he has a gun to your head saying eat the bon-bons! You have to take ownership in that the food you put in your body is you putting it there. You don't have to eat something because you see someone doing it. I am not saying this is easy, but it certainly isn't someone else's fault that you are eating too many calories.0 -
Topic: How do you stay on track when you live with temptation?
If by "on track" you mean "not eating the food that's tempting you", I don't. I snack on my wife's tortilla chips or chocolates that are around the house quite often, and sometimes we buy some ice cream or whatever looks good. I just don't eat so much of it that the calories will screw up the weight loss too much. Often, I'm still under my target for the day even after it. I usually try to have those big snacks on workout days so there's more wiggle room in my calories anyway.0 -
I read your post and completely understand where you are coming from. I tell my husband it's like being an alcoholic and your spouse keeping alcohol in the house. People that don't have a desire or a need to lose weight just don't understand that it's an addition like anything else. I have asked my husband to do me a favor and buy snacks that I don't crave or like so the temptation isn't there. Also I asked him if he does buy something I like to bring it to work with him and eat it there. I am a junk food junkie with the best of them so it's tough. For example if he wants ice cream which is my downfall I ask that he not buy it at the store and keep it in the house but rather go get some from an ice cream shop when he wants it eat it and then it's not in the house all the time. My husband also can eat whatever he wants, not work out and still be skinny. I feel your pain girl!0
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I make my hubby hide the junk, and eat it in a different room.0
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My husband works out of town 20 days a month so I'm lucky he's not here to do that but I have 3 teenage eating machines with me at all times.
In all honesty I just use willpower. I know what I want and how I want to look and just don't give in to their junk food!
I used to binge eat in the evenings out of boredom and lonliness. I now schedule exercise to fill in those gaps. I go for a 1 hr walk after dinner then I do an exercise dvd at around 9pm. I find this totally cuts the binging and temptation.
On the weekends when I first started I kept as busy as I could with shopping, visiting friends etc so the days flew by with no slow time to fall back into old habits.
It's taken 4 months but my relathionship with food has completely changed. I now use it as fuel for my body not comfort.
Keep at it, your husband will see you getting results and not want to feel left out resulting in him joining you on your journey!!!0 -
Your situation reminds me of an episode of intervention where a drug addicted woman tried getting clean while living with her drug addicted man, except switch junk food with drugs of course! Needless to say it didn't work out with them and she ended up moving on. I'm not suggesting that you move on but maybe the junk food needs to go away (for some time at least)? Maybe you can find some good substitutes such as wasabi peas, pita chips, fiber one brownies, carrots with hummus, etc? I personally feel blessed for having my wife who jumped on board with me in getting healthy b/c I wouldn't be able to do it without her support and isn't that what a spouse should do for their SO?0
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My husband has been very supportive of my weight loss and has been exercising with me and encouraging me to keep going. But getting him on the "healthy eating" track was a bit more difficult. He liked his sweets, he likes his ribs, burgers, ect. And as long as he works out he can still eat them and lose. I found the trick was to find "healthy recipes" recipes that our whole family would like and I found that gradually changing them was easier. For example, my family loves spaghetti, making it with whole grain pasta and the sauce w/ground white turkey and having a small portion with a large tossed salad is the best. The first time I made it that way, they all turned up their noses, ate a small amount and then had a ton of junk food later. So the next time, I mixed half regular noodles and half whole wheat, and then half ground beef and half turkey . . . . they didn't even notice, then each time, I would add more and more of the whole grain, ground turkey and make the portions smaller and the salads larger, until now we are eating 100% whole grain pasta and using only ground turkey. I did the same thing with burgers, meatloaf. I even did pizza and now "pizza night" consists of whole grain pita pizzas made with reduced fat cheese, grilled chicken and lots of veggies as toppings. For sweets, I have baked apples w/cinnamon and nutmeg. Mixed fruit w/plain greek yogurt and frozen it slightly to make an awesome frozen treat. I make sugar free, fat free pudding and fill it with fruit, sometimes for a special treat, I will put it in a reduced fat graham cracker crust and call it a pie, they love that. The key is to find creative ways to make foods they like healthy. So they don't think you eating healthy means eating carrot sticks all day . . . because I don't have any idea how anyone could get their family to go for that. Take their favorite dishes and search the internet for healthier options.0
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I do the shopping and have recently told him I won't buy anymore junk. One thing I used to do is buy a sweet that I did't like so I won't be tempted. I try to show him how eating healthy isn't all bad, you can still eat tasty foods. My 3 year old is so bad he most often than not refuses to eat dinner. He just wants junk food. I need to change my whole house to a healthy home. I guess it really is beyond just my husband eating unhealthy but I want to have a healthy active family. :happy:
You are the one letting your child eat junk instead of dinner. Mine just turned 4. If he doesn't eat a reasonable amount of his dinner, his choice for snacks are fruit, veggie, cheese and crackers or yogurt. If he eats his dinner properly, then sometimes, he gets more options - brownies, ice cream etc.0 -
1. I have no goals beyond today, never have.... The goal for today MOVE and EAT... If I stick to that goal, the bigger unwritten goals of losing weight, getting to a certain size, etc... will take care of themselves... FOCUS on today....
MOVE = Excercise, it is not dreaded, I crave it...
EAT = Don't eat what will screw with my moving
2. I eat chocolate. I keep a bowl of hershey kisses dark. I eat 3 or 4 and walk away.
3. Supreme Protein Bars = Like eating a million dollar bar... get a chocolate fix packed with protein and PROTEIN = LEAN
4. A natural bull dog mentality = I've locked on to the idea I will not be fat again.... 19 months since hitting getting to 175...0
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