How painful

Luludog1

I have lost 35lbs since last November and was feeling great and my confidence was high. However, I think myself perception is skewed because when I look at myself in the mirror I think I looked pretty decent. Then I saw a picture of myself and was shocked at how big I still am. (Currently at 184lbs… I was wearing a size 16 and 2xl shirts and am currently in a 12 and Large shirt) So, in order to get a better perception of myself, I asked my fiancé/boyfriend of 11yrs to tell my honestly how big I really am/look. I asked him, “ If you saw me on the street would you say, that girl is big/fat/slim.” He said your still big. Why I did this is beyond me…so today I am really sad and discouraged.

Also, my weight has been very stagnant the last couple months, I have only been dropping about 2-3 lbs per month…anyone have any motivating words or any ideas for pushing myself out of this funk? Thanks

weightoffmom

Big Picture Moment:
You are still losing and thats what matters. Keep going, stay focused on you.

CasperO

Sometimes we make huge dynamic strides, and sometimes we just take a baby step, and once in a while we even slip backward a little,,, but as long as you don't quit, then it isn't over and you haven't lost.

35 pounds is a huge accomplishment. You are progressing just fine, and you're well on your way. You're not "skinny" yet, and maybe you never will be, but you're working hard and improving and doing super.

"You're still big",,, Ok, he could have chosen his words a little more carefully. At least he didn't lie to you. I probably would'a said "You're not quite where you wanna be yet, but you've made a lot of progress" - which is of course just a sweeter way of saying the same thing.


Don't sweat the 2-3 lb./month thing. Do more if you can, but realize that you only have 64 more pounds to go. Which at 2 a month is 32 months. Which really isn't that long in the big scheme of things. We didn't get heavy overnight, and we won't get healthy overnight.

You're doing fine. Try to focus on the progress you've made.

pcbta

I would suggest to possibly just try to tone a bit. don't worry about the pounds. You can lose sizes and many many inches with a good routine...checkout some of the biggest loser workouts...love those!!!

Cindy

huis14

This happens to me all the time. When I'm in the middle of working out and am in the process of losing weight someone will call me "big guy" or "big fella". Then I'll see a picture and be upset by it. When that happens I just take a step back and think, "I need to be patient with this. I have not reached my goal weight yet so I shouldn't be upset about this." Just keep working!

One last thought, when I was "slimmer" I remember being upset about how I looked big in pictures. Now when I look at those old pictures I can't believe how skinny I was. My point: A lot of it is mental!

zibbity

Aww! Cheer up! Yeah, you may not be there yet, but 30 pounds is a huge accomplishment! Seriously. And to be completely honest, a size 12 isn't "big" to me. I'd say its more in the chubby range. But that's just my opinion. Just keep at it!

Adele

You look great in your profile pic! 30 lbs is a huge accomplishment and I am sure it was not easy to attain. Just keep trekking...sometimes your body needs a break from the weightloss and then you start losing again.

I've lost 26 lbs total and have "plateaued" for months now...it took me YEARS to put it on, so it will take time to take it off.

kandyjo

I would be totally pysched to be where you are now..... "BIG" is a realative term at some points. I mean...there is BIG, but then when you are comparing yourself to tiny, little super model people you always feel "big" even if you are at a decent weight....
So, here is my two cents....
Be content (but always pushing to better yourself) with where you are. That doesn't mean stop losing weight....BUT you can be happy with you and your accomplishments and LIVE IN THE MOMENT!! Don't put your life on hold until you reach your goal weight. Live now!!
Don't set yourself up for disappointment by asking people "how they see you" if you even think that the answer will make you feel bad. Just know that you are on a journey. You have come a long way already, but you are still working toward a goal that you will one day reach and be a healthier person for it...
Ok, didn't mean to ramble, but that is my input on the situation...:happy:
Congrats on how far you have come already!!! YOU ROCK!!!! :drinker:

leighoconnell

I've had the same thing happen. In my case I have a size 0 sister who looks like a super model. She's that way naturally darn her. But in any case, since I was very young people have compared me to her, including my mom, and told me I am fat. I would always look at those pictures and go wow, I am really fat. I'm 5'9" and a very busty girl by nature and back then I weighed 165 lbs and was a size 9. Now I weigh 212 (was 222 2 weeks ago) and am a size 16 and look back and can't believe how skinny I was. Let me also mention I was an avid tennis player hitting the gym 4 times a week and playing tennis every day. I had a flat stomach and good curves. I think that a lot of it is in our head and confirmed by the nasty comments of others. In addition society puts so much pressure on women to look like Hollywood that its unrealistic. It is unhealthy and unattrative to be nothing but bones. Did you know one of the greatest sex symbols of all times, Marilyn Monroe, was a size 12? Why don't you ask yourself this, would you prefer to have your curves and fill out your clothes nice or would like to look like a twig? There is nothing wrong with being a size twelve, its an average girl, and you have something all the skinny of the girls wish for...BOOBS!

Luludog1

I have never asked for any motivational words on MFP rather I am one to give motivation...but i must say I truly feel better having read all your comments. Thank goodness for MFP!!!!