Perfectionism: Weekends, food, and exercise

ConnieLynn

Hi there,

Where does this come from? The need to do things perfectly. I had it when I was younger, but my father was a perfectionist, so I thought I got it from him.

I am now starting to realize that it is a condition that is more common.

Here is the definition of perfectionism from wikipedia :
...describes two types of perfectionism. Normal perfectionists "derive a very real sense of pleasure from the labours of a painstaking effort" while neurotic perfectionists are "unable to feel satisfaction because in their own eyes they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling". Burns (also in Parker & Adkins 1994) defines perfectionists as "people who strain compulsively and unremittingly toward impossible goals and who measure their own worth entirely in terms of productivity and accomplishment". Hewitt and Flett (1991) devised the Perfectionistic Self-Presentation Scale (PSPS), which rates three aspects of perfectionistic self-presentation: advertising one's own perfection, avoiding situations in which one might appear to be imperfect and failing to disclose situations in which one has been imperfect.

Slaney (1996) created the Almost Perfect scale, which contains four variables: Standards and Order, Relationships, Anxiety, and Procrastination. It distinguishes between adaptive and maladaptive perfectionism. Both adaptive and maladaptive perfectionists rate high in Standards and Order, but maladaptive perfectionists also rate high in Anxiety and Procrastination.

Perfectionists can suffer anxiety and low self-esteem. Perfectionism is a risk factor for obsessive-compulsive disorder, eating disorders, and clinical depression.

This warrents further study as I still don't understand why we have it.

I had to teach myself not to be a perfectionist and it took years of practice.

If we have a little more food on the weekend or miss a work out one day, it does not mean we have to give up because we did not do it perfectly. I let myself have a little more on occasion and if I don't work out, I know I will the next day or two.

Relax and set realistic goals that take into account that we do not need to be perfect.

Any thoughts on why we have perfectionism in our make up?

Connie Lynn

ConnieLynn

Hi there,

Where does this come from? The need to do things perfectly. I had it when I was younger, but my father was a perfectionist, so I thought I got it from him.

I am now starting to realize that it is a condition that is more common.

Here is the definition of perfectionism from wikipedia :
...describes two types of perfectionism. Normal perfectionists "derive a very real sense of pleasure from the labours of a painstaking effort" while neurotic perfectionists are "unable to feel satisfaction because in their own eyes they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling". Burns (also in Parker & Adkins 1994) defines perfectionists as "people who strain compulsively and unremittingly toward impossible goals and who measure their own worth entirely in terms of productivity and accomplishment". Hewitt and Flett (1991) devised the Perfectionistic Self-Presentation Scale (PSPS), which rates three aspects of perfectionistic self-presentation: advertising one's own perfection, avoiding situations in which one might appear to be imperfect and failing to disclose situations in which one has been imperfect.

Slaney (1996) created the Almost Perfect scale, which contains four variables: Standards and Order, Relationships, Anxiety, and Procrastination. It distinguishes between adaptive and maladaptive perfectionism. Both adaptive and maladaptive perfectionists rate high in Standards and Order, but maladaptive perfectionists also rate high in Anxiety and Procrastination.

Perfectionists can suffer anxiety and low self-esteem. Perfectionism is a risk factor for obsessive-compulsive disorder, eating disorders, and clinical depression.

This warrents further study as I still don't understand why we have it.

I had to teach myself not to be a perfectionist and it took years of practice.

If we have a little more food on the weekend or miss a work out one day, it does not mean we have to give up because we did not do it perfectly. I let myself have a little more on occasion and if I don't work out, I know I will the next day or two.

Relax and set realistic goals that take into account that we do not need to be perfect.

Any thoughts on why we have perfectionism in our make up?

Connie Lynn

Razboo

You need to ask that? Society has conditioned us from our earliest days! Were not your first tests in elementary school marked as a percent of 100? Were not those who acheived the highest percentage given the laurels? (Or gold star as it were.) Mistakes marked with a big red "X"?

I believe it starts even earlier than that in our infancy. You know, when such things as the smell of poo are taught by our mothers is gross and unpleasant. We couldn't understand language yet, but our mother's facial experessions were enough.

I think a lot of how we handle perfection - and failure - is something that we learn very early. Like most aspects of the human condition, some of use handle each better or worse than others.

That said, just like law abiding parents can raise criminals through no fault of thier own, there are a lot of other factors of influence built during the development of the psyche.

My 2 cents.

ConnieLynn

Excellent insight Razboo.

Any one else have thoughts on Perfectionism?

I know it has to do with our egos.

I think the best way to approach any task is to try our best and to always realize that mistakes are valuable in that we learn the most from them.

It is all a part of the learning process.

So be kind to yourself and realize you will make mistakes and that is good!!!

Connie Lynn