SBF2 Reboot Boogaloo July 9th

yoginimary

Today is husband's birthday, so dessert will be on the menu this tonight. I ate way too much of it over my holiday, I'll have two weeks before the anniversary weekend to remove all desserts.

Today I'm joining a second gym. Yep, a second one. A chain called Planet Fitness. They just have machines and it's $10 a month, so husband and I are joining for the summer.

I got an update from my yoga teacher in India. Her apartment has iffy hot/ any water and electricity, no A/C, and they have to boil both the water and food before consuming. She's loving the yoga though. She's in Pune studying with Iyengar and his daughter Geeta.

Still learning how to eat, boogaloo!

Mary

cp005e

Mary, I love your new profile picture - that is so cool. It sounds like you had a fun (if chilly) trip! The whale watching sounds amazing.

MM, I'm sorry you're feeling frustrated with the diet. Don't give up. You can do it! :happy: :flowerforyou:

I am feeling pretty good (if a little bit sore) because I have exercised every day this week so far, and am planning to go to Zumba class tonight. And... I ran for an HOUR last night without stopping. :noway: Man, was I sweaty and red-faced when I finally stopped! I managed just over 5.5 miles during that time, doing the first couple of miles at 6mph, then dropping down to 5mph and back up to 5.5mph. It was really hard, though - so I'm not sure if I'm quite ready for the trail running group. Just as I was finishing, a girl hopped up on the treadmill next to me and started warming up at 5.5mph... and then I saw her bump it up to 9mph as I was leaving. Yikes! I am not a fast runner. :ohwell:

Staying awake through a two-hour meeting boogaloo... :yawn:

lotusfromthemud

Currently fighting the urge to not workout today, but I keep repeating "elliptical boogaloo!"

I'm just going to check in, log my lunch, check my email and change and leave. I'm just going to suck it up.

Mary, I am in awe of your handstand pic. Also, I literally laughed out loud at the Ashtanga/Bikram hot tubs. Every time I look at pictures of the Badlands I cannot believe it, so I might like rocks, too. I booked the LAST cabin available in the park yesterday, so that was a pretty good score. I also discovered that our road trip is during the Sturgis Rally (bikers!) so that will make for an extra adventure. I'm excited/anxious about such a long road trip, I haven't done one in forever. (in my twenties I drove solo from Orlando, FL to Seattle, WA and never went on the interstate once. It took three weeks (I'm not much for long stretches of driving. . .I like to stop and poke around). So, I'm trying to re-capture my sense of adventure, I guess. . .

Take care boogaloo!:flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Howdy friends.
I'm going to be making some changes. I'm not sure exactly what yet, but something is going to change. I really really wanted to stop on the way home from study and get a burger, or even a grilled chicken sandwich, but I didn't. I knew I would feel guilty. I ate a salad at home instead and I feel better for it. I have spent my entire teen and adult years being obsessed with my weight and with food. I LOVE food! Too much as a matter in fact. I find it has become a god, an obsession, and my God never intended it to be that way. So I am prayerfully considering the next step. I am going to stick with my "diet" for now, but what I want food to become is fuel for my body, as so many other people have discovered, or said they have. I want to eat well and enjoy it. But you know what? I can't do that in my own strength. I will fail again and again and again. I can't lose weight until my inside is different, until my perspective of food as change. I don't know what I am doing but I know the Lord will help me. He's helped me through so many harder things.
Anyway, I don't plan to quit MFP altogether. You all are my friends and I care about you. I just need to do some soul searching right now and get rid of this heavy burden that I have been carrying around for years. I think you all understand.
I am doing okay on the diet. I believe I am staying under on my sugar, though I haven't logged today. I do feel better. No sugar highs and lows and that helps a lot. I don't feel as heavy after I eat. I think I am on the right track. What I need is balance. In all honesty I do not want to be counting calories the rest of the my life. There has to be a way to lose and maintain weight without being obsessed about it. My weight and the way I eat is not the root of the problem. I have bigger problems that need to be dealt with and I think the weight loss and eating problem will fall into place as the root is dealt with.
Anyway, I am still here. I'll still be checking in with you all. I'll still be eating healthy. I just keep thinking there's got to be a better way...not easier just better...for me.
Sorry. I wrote a book. I hope it made sense and I don't sound crazy. lol. My whole point is that I am tired of being obsessed with myself and the way I look. Now off to create a healthy meal plan for the next week.
Finding balance boogaloo!
MM

lotusfromthemud

MM,

I actually had a song I sung (sometimes in my inside voice) when my cravings got really bad for a binge. Since I eat emotionally, it would usually be an emotion I was trying to stuff down, a hurt I was trying to salve, or something I couldn't express. Or, sometimes, I just really wanted the food. The thirty seconds (or so) it took to sing my song centered me. Maybe there's a prayer or a song or a verse you could choose as a touchstone? It really worked for me, and I still use it every once in a while to remind myself that food won't solve my problems, only giving over my problems will solve my problems. And, every once in a while, the thirty seconds I spent singing that song were over and I said to myself: "no, I just really want a small bag of potato chips.". . .and I would have them.

Just what worked for me. (I used the song "I Surrender All", but any song will work if it means something to you. . . )

I have gotten to the point that I love a salad as much as a burger, but when I'm really upset about something, it still feels like a cheeseburger will fix it. It won't, but it still feels that way. Also, a break from logging my food helped me to re-focus on why I was watching what I ate in the first place.

Your pebbles are here for you. :flowerforyou:

mechanicmom

Thanks V. That's the kind of song I need to remember when I want to eat and I don't need to. I think I will try to find a verse to meditate on when the cravings come. Both of those are great ideas! I'm doing the same with the Russia trips. I have compiled all the "fear God" and "fear not" verses (well not all but enough to cover the entire year) and I am going to put them in a book and take that book with me on my trips. I think it will really help me put my focus where it should be and not on my fears.
I think this website I was using is a bit extreme on the candida diet stuff. I'm going to the half price bookstore now to see if I can find what I am looking for. I got super tired around 5 oclock, and I have eaten now and feel a little better. I don't know what that was all about. Blood sugar I guess.
bookstore boogie woogie!
MM

mechanicmom

No book. Oh well. I'll do my best. What I would do for some chocolate custard with snickers or marshmallow creme right now. :laugh: :ohwell:
MM