Courtesy (rant)

NotGoddess

The gas station I go to is always busy on Sunday-extra discounts off gas. I went in to pay-there's a sign on the door that says "Form a line to the left". There were two people waiting and I moved in behind them. Another person got in line behind me. As the line moved and I was going to be the next to pay a guy walked into the door (I'll call him Biff) and stood behind the guy currently at the counter. I said 'Sir!' twice to get his attention but he didn't hear me (I was 5 feet away and not soft). I made a noise and the guy behind me said something to the effect of 'Some people don't listen'.

While Biff paid I fumed a little. He turned to leave and I waved my hand to get his attention and said "Sir, if you could join the line next time, please? People were already waiting" Biff said "I didn't see it.", not apologetic at all, just stating it. I said "I understand. If you could pay a little more attention to your surroundings, I'd appreciate it" He gave me that disgusted wave of dismissal and left.

...then I realized my little stab had also held the line up and the clerk was waiting. I said 'Sorry' to the folks behind me and went up to the clerk to pay. The clerk apologized for not doing anything. I said "It's okay, I just hate when people do that. Sorry for my rant." The clerk said "It's Mother's Day-you're allowed."

Now, I realize Biff is the type that isn't going to change and my little tirade just held the whole line up, but was I wrong to do it? I just feel if no one bothers to speak up there will be more Biffs in the world and that won't help anyone. Or should I have just kept my mouth shut and let it go, My little speech wasn't long but I feel bad for holding up the line.

Discuss.

YoungDoc2B

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

deadstarsunburn

Nah you were fine! Lol

NotGoddess

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

No, but it may affect what I do next time I find myself in a similar situation.
If I could travel back in time to take something back I have much bigger items on my list to address.

pauljsolie

Nope, sounds like you were polite. We need more people like you in the world and fewer "Biffs".

morkiemama

The clerk should have made him join the line imo and you never should have HAD to say anything. However, I probably would have called him out on it too when the clerk didn't do their job. :P

cmriverside

Ha! That's the kind of thing I do all the time - well, when I'm feeling particularly stabby, at least. Good for you. Meh, so what if you held up the line for 15 seconds? I'm sure the rest of them were silently cheering you on.

Newf77

You were a lot nicer than I am. I have on many occasions spoken up to people and I do hold clerks accountable for not managing the lines {if it is obvious that they are capable of doing so}. I also do not care about age. I was recently in a store self check-out and a kid {about 10 YOA} grabbed the coupons off my machines printer; I ensured mom heard me ask kindly for my property back.

doonesbury

Just the other day...
I was in a line...
Waiting...
and waiting...
I was next in line when a fella came to open a checkout that was directly across from one I was in line for, behind me.
Fella said, "I can take who's next"
I turned...
Man sauntered up with his rather full cart...
(I had one item, he had not previously been in line)
And parked his azz in front of just opened checkout.
I swiftly spun
And slid in front of him, saying...
Excuse me, I believe "who's next" refers to me.

With down turned eyes...
He slid his cart back

deadstarsunburn

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

LittleMissRainey

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

No it wasn't, it was funny! You need to rent Back To The Future.

terrellc1

You can never know the kind of day another person is having. If you feel that you did the right thing, then good. But never assume that a person does something simply to be rude.

michaelgilstrap

I think you can justify or condemn either decision. I think you'd be still upset with yourself if you didn't say something, so you did what you felt was right, you didn't use profanity or get personal or hateful, or too long a speech, so it sounds possibly appropriate, but that said, you got it let it go, I'm sure he and everybody else there has forgot it, and your still holding it which is wrong. You deserve better.

NotGoddess

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

No it wasn't, it was funny! You need to rent Back To The Future.

Hah. I thought of BotF too when he posted. And it is a valid point- you can't change what's happened.

saragato

I wouldn't say you were wrong, but in the end it's not going to change anything for then or next time "Biff" finds himself in that situation. There's nothing wrong with being assertive and standing up for yourself and perhaps others but if your goal is to maybe make him think twice next time it's kind of a waste. Yes you get your frustration out, maybe you make someone else feel better knowing they weren't the only one wishing he hadn't done it, but at the same time you get a shrug and a general "whatever" response and life goes on. In other words, you win and lose at the same time. Course you lose without saying anything too.

Some people are aloof or simply don't care and you can't tell them any different. Some will challenge you, some will back down. All you can do is, if you choose to even address it, handle it maturely and even politely. I've had people cut into lines, go into express lanes with three times the limit, block aisles so they can chat with someone or just stare at their phone, or if I happen to be ahead of them, ram their carts into my backside like it's a cushion. To them all I'd love to give them the nastier end of my mouth but I was raised to be at the least patient with people like that because if you start *kitten*, you'll get *kitten*.

At the end of the day you did what you believed was necessary and the worst that happened was you held up the line just a bit, but you at least apologized. No harm no foul.

michaelgilstrap

You can never know the kind of day another person is having. If you feel that you did the right thing, then good. But never assume that a person does something simply to be rude.

so true, he might have been just having a bad day and been totally oblivious, and than to embarrassed to say anything, but make a hasty retreat. I do think, although we will sometimes be wrong, it is healthy to sometimes assume the best in people no matter how improbable in a situation like this that nobody really was hurt, or in danger, just shortly inconvenienced. It was brought to my attention in a recent sermon that I am often guilty of judging others by their actions, while judging myself by my intentions and not my actions.

AllTehBeers

As a c-store manager who has spent a fair amout behind the register, sometimes people are just going to be @sses. I get people all the time that can clearly see I'm right in the middle of a transaction with another customer when they shove cash in my face for gas. When you're busy, sometimes its not worth the time and energy for a confrontation.

You were right telling him something. I love when my regulars tell of some jerk.

abberbabber

The clerk should have made him join the line imo and you never should have HAD to say anything. However, I probably would have called him out on it too when the clerk didn't do their job. :P

Having worked in retail, it's very difficult to be the person to say "You need to move to the back of the line". People can get very angry and in your face about things....it's really not my job to babysit and make sure people follow the "rules". Is it fair to the people who did and waited in line? Of course not, but what was the clerk supposed to do? Refuse to serve him until he got in line? That would have held everybody up even more.

anakinlover

I love that you called him "Biff"! Cracked me the hell up! :laugh:

Stowguy2012

you had the right to say what you wanted to but the clerk should have done something.

bbbgamer

Damn, now you have held up my logging........

JoolieW68

Just made the Biff/Back To The Future connection. A little slow today.

For me it would depend on the type of day I had....I would probably speak up if I was not having a good day (which is usually not the time to do so as I may say something I'd regret), but usually I would let the person go with the thought that they must need something more to me and karma will catch up with them (and me, in a good way I'd hope).

Musikelektronik

Whether "Biff" was "right" to cut into the line, or you were "wrong" to call him on it, is irrelevant. I've found that life's too short to get worked up about stuff like this. As you correctly pointed out, Biff isn't going to change. All you did today was raise your own blood pressure. And you still don't feel any better about the whole thing.

morkiemama

The clerk should have made him join the line imo and you never should have HAD to say anything. However, I probably would have called him out on it too when the clerk didn't do their job. :P

Having worked in retail, it's very difficult to be the person to say "You need to move to the back of the line". People can get very angry and in your face about things....it's really not my job to babysit and make sure people follow the "rules". Is it fair to the people who did and waited in line? Of course not, but what was the clerk supposed to do? Refuse to serve him until he got in line? That would have held everybody up even more.

I've worked in retail too. Often on register. It is the clerk's job to manage the line. I'd rather piss off one jerk who is NOT being courteous, than my entire line of customers who were there first and are being polite and following the rules.

It really is a clerk's job, as an employee of the store, to enforce store policy and provide good customer service. When I worked retail it WAS my job to assure people followed the "rules." Managing my line, coupon policy, making people pay for things and not steal, etc. However, that is just me. If you don't feel the need to step in, that is your choice. ::shrug::

hbrittingham

You can never know the kind of day another person is having. If you feel that you did the right thing, then good. But never assume that a person does something simply to be rude.

so true, he might have been just having a bad day and been totally oblivious, and than to embarrassed to say anything, but make a hasty retreat. I do think, although we will sometimes be wrong, it is healthy to sometimes assume the best in people no matter how improbable in a situation like this that nobody really was hurt, or in danger, just shortly inconvenienced. It was brought to my attention in a recent sermon that I am often guilty of judging others by their actions, while judging myself by my intentions and not my actions.

Well, if he was having a bad day and was oblivious, then the OP speaking to him might have made an impression. However, I don't buy that at all. Most people who do something like that are inconsiderate and feel more self important than anyone else, which is why they feel justified in cutting in line. Sorry, but we already live in a horribly self centered, self absorbed world, I am not going to encourage the behavior by ignoring poor manners.

Elizabeth_C34

There are *kitten* all over doing stupid rude stuff like this all the time. Pointing it out won't do much good. They are still rude *kitten*. Don't let stuff like this get to you and piss you off so much. It's a small thing in the long run, and it was the clerk's place to say something, not you.

I don't think you saying anything was bad, just a waste of energy on your part.

livinginwoods

In situations like these I keep my mouth shut and smile. Life is to short to get so worked up. I see no point in causing a scene over something like this.

jsapninz

I probably would have reacted the same way you did, but I don't think it is the best way to behave.

Bad manners are not solved by bad manners.

The most polite thing to do would have been accept that people are jerks and go on about your day. :ohwell:

mkrainville7409

Good Job!

JulieH3art

This happened to me waiting in line at the airport. There was a long line with people all going on the same plane. This woman pushed her bag under the divider and casually entered the line right in front of me (I was pretty far along, too). I asked her politely if she was joining her friends. She said no. I then pointed at the rest of the line and told her how I think it is rude to cut in front of all of them without a specific reason, and that we are all going on the same flight. She rolled her eyes and suddenly didn't "understand English".

mkrainville7409

I probably would have reacted the same way you did, but I don't think it is the best way to behave.

Bad manners are not solved by bad manners.

The most polite thing to do would have been accept that people are jerks and go on about your day. :ohwell:

It didnt sound unpolite... it would be different if she had cursed at him or somthing, she said "excuse me" and she also apologized to the people behind her... it wasnt polite of him to jump the line... that was rude...