Courtesy (rant)

NotGoddess

The gas station I go to is always busy on Sunday-extra discounts off gas. I went in to pay-there's a sign on the door that says "Form a line to the left". There were two people waiting and I moved in behind them. Another person got in line behind me. As the line moved and I was going to be the next to pay a guy walked into the door (I'll call him Biff) and stood behind the guy currently at the counter. I said 'Sir!' twice to get his attention but he didn't hear me (I was 5 feet away and not soft). I made a noise and the guy behind me said something to the effect of 'Some people don't listen'.

While Biff paid I fumed a little. He turned to leave and I waved my hand to get his attention and said "Sir, if you could join the line next time, please? People were already waiting" Biff said "I didn't see it.", not apologetic at all, just stating it. I said "I understand. If you could pay a little more attention to your surroundings, I'd appreciate it" He gave me that disgusted wave of dismissal and left.

...then I realized my little stab had also held the line up and the clerk was waiting. I said 'Sorry' to the folks behind me and went up to the clerk to pay. The clerk apologized for not doing anything. I said "It's okay, I just hate when people do that. Sorry for my rant." The clerk said "It's Mother's Day-you're allowed."

Now, I realize Biff is the type that isn't going to change and my little tirade just held the whole line up, but was I wrong to do it? I just feel if no one bothers to speak up there will be more Biffs in the world and that won't help anyone. Or should I have just kept my mouth shut and let it go, My little speech wasn't long but I feel bad for holding up the line.

Discuss.

YoungDoc2B

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

deadstarsunburn

Nah you were fine! Lol

NotGoddess

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

No, but it may affect what I do next time I find myself in a similar situation.
If I could travel back in time to take something back I have much bigger items on my list to address.

pauljsolie

Nope, sounds like you were polite. We need more people like you in the world and fewer "Biffs".

morkiemama

The clerk should have made him join the line imo and you never should have HAD to say anything. However, I probably would have called him out on it too when the clerk didn't do their job. :P

cmriverside

Ha! That's the kind of thing I do all the time - well, when I'm feeling particularly stabby, at least. Good for you. Meh, so what if you held up the line for 15 seconds? I'm sure the rest of them were silently cheering you on.

Newf77

You were a lot nicer than I am. I have on many occasions spoken up to people and I do hold clerks accountable for not managing the lines {if it is obvious that they are capable of doing so}. I also do not care about age. I was recently in a store self check-out and a kid {about 10 YOA} grabbed the coupons off my machines printer; I ensured mom heard me ask kindly for my property back.

doonesbury

Just the other day...
I was in a line...
Waiting...
and waiting...
I was next in line when a fella came to open a checkout that was directly across from one I was in line for, behind me.
Fella said, "I can take who's next"
I turned...
Man sauntered up with his rather full cart...
(I had one item, he had not previously been in line)
And parked his azz in front of just opened checkout.
I swiftly spun
And slid in front of him, saying...
Excuse me, I believe "who's next" refers to me.

With down turned eyes...
He slid his cart back

deadstarsunburn

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

LittleMissRainey

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

No it wasn't, it was funny! You need to rent Back To The Future.

terrellc1

You can never know the kind of day another person is having. If you feel that you did the right thing, then good. But never assume that a person does something simply to be rude.

michaelgilstrap

I think you can justify or condemn either decision. I think you'd be still upset with yourself if you didn't say something, so you did what you felt was right, you didn't use profanity or get personal or hateful, or too long a speech, so it sounds possibly appropriate, but that said, you got it let it go, I'm sure he and everybody else there has forgot it, and your still holding it which is wrong. You deserve better.

NotGoddess

So, if we say that you were wrong to do it, are you going to travel back in time and take it back?

That was kind of rude.

No it wasn't, it was funny! You need to rent Back To The Future.

Hah. I thought of BotF too when he posted. And it is a valid point- you can't change what's happened.

saragato

I wouldn't say you were wrong, but in the end it's not going to change anything for then or next time "Biff" finds himself in that situation. There's nothing wrong with being assertive and standing up for yourself and perhaps others but if your goal is to maybe make him think twice next time it's kind of a waste. Yes you get your frustration out, maybe you make someone else feel better knowing they weren't the only one wishing he hadn't done it, but at the same time you get a shrug and a general "whatever" response and life goes on. In other words, you win and lose at the same time. Course you lose without saying anything too.

Some people are aloof or simply don't care and you can't tell them any different. Some will challenge you, some will back down. All you can do is, if you choose to even address it, handle it maturely and even politely. I've had people cut into lines, go into express lanes with three times the limit, block aisles so they can chat with someone or just stare at their phone, or if I happen to be ahead of them, ram their carts into my backside like it's a cushion. To them all I'd love to give them the nastier end of my mouth but I was raised to be at the least patient with people like that because if you start *kitten*, you'll get *kitten*.

At the end of the day you did what you believed was necessary and the worst that happened was you held up the line just a bit, but you at least apologized. No harm no foul.

michaelgilstrap

You can never know the kind of day another person is having. If you feel that you did the right thing, then good. But never assume that a person does something simply to be rude.

so true, he might have been just having a bad day and been totally oblivious, and than to embarrassed to say anything, but make a hasty retreat. I do think, although we will sometimes be wrong, it is healthy to sometimes assume the best in people no matter how improbable in a situation like this that nobody really was hurt, or in danger, just shortly inconvenienced. It was brought to my attention in a recent sermon that I am often guilty of judging others by their actions, while judging myself by my intentions and not my actions.

AllTehBeers

As a c-store manager who has spent a fair amout behind the register, sometimes people are just going to be @sses. I get people all the time that can clearly see I'm right in the middle of a transaction with another customer when they shove cash in my face for gas. When you're busy, sometimes its not worth the time and energy for a confrontation.

You were right telling him something. I love when my regulars tell of some jerk.

abberbabber

The clerk should have made him join the line imo and you never should have HAD to say anything. However, I probably would have called him out on it too when the clerk didn't do their job. :P

Having worked in retail, it's very difficult to be the person to say "You need to move to the back of the line". People can get very angry and in your face about things....it's really not my job to babysit and make sure people follow the "rules". Is it fair to the people who did and waited in line? Of course not, but what was the clerk supposed to do? Refuse to serve him until he got in line? That would have held everybody up even more.

anakinlover

I love that you called him "Biff"! Cracked me the hell up! :laugh:

Stowguy2012

you had the right to say what you wanted to but the clerk should have done something.

bbbgamer

Damn, now you have held up my logging........