What's going to happen to me??

agthorn
agthorn Posts: 1,844 Member
edited December 2024 in Chit-Chat
So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??
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Replies

  • Sidesteal
    Sidesteal Posts: 5,510 Member
    You are going to get bulky instead of toned for two reasons.

    1) You are lifting more than 5 lbs.
    2) Dem shakes.
  • njmp
    njmp Posts: 277 Member
    I'm sorry to say...but yes, your uterus is going to fall out. And you might grow back hair.
  • nz_deevaa
    nz_deevaa Posts: 12,209 Member
    You won't get long lean muscles, you'll get short stubby ones.
  • myak623
    myak623 Posts: 615 Member
    Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    Yes! You should know better!
  • scubachick2287
    scubachick2287 Posts: 57
    I read online..or maybe Dr. Oz said..that if your uterus falls out you can reinsert with a coat hanger. Just fyi..
  • FlyByJuly
    FlyByJuly Posts: 564 Member
    If your uterus has not fallen out by now, it's probably well on its way. But wait...you can reverse it! Just eat back only half of the calories you burned while hauling that package into the house. Remember...only half. Best of luck.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
  • agthorn
    agthorn Posts: 1,844 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
    Well, since I picked it up from the ground, that's more like a deadlift, right? So I'm okay then?
  • Jules2Be
    Jules2Be Posts: 2,238 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.

    nah...that makes you pee
  • Erindipitous
    Erindipitous Posts: 1,234 Member
    Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    Sadly, yes. Start swapping your underwear for banana hammocks while your penis starts to grow.
  • Elizabeth_C34
    Elizabeth_C34 Posts: 6,376 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
    Well, since I picked it up from the ground, that's more like a deadlift, right? So I'm okay then?

    For now. For the sake of your unborn children, don't put anything on your back and squat!
  • jenj1313
    jenj1313 Posts: 898 Member
    LMAO ~ I am screwed I guess!
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
    I think now, you are supposed to lie on your back with your legs in the air against a wall.
  • k011185
    k011185 Posts: 320 Member
    Too late, it fell out when you ordered it.
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    You should have known better......always duct tape your uterus befroe you lift! Duh! Saw that on TV! :huh:
  • warmachinejt
    warmachinejt Posts: 2,162 Member
    tomorrow you'll look like the guy in my avy <<<----
    that's some serious heavy lifting there miss
  • Hernandeak11
    Hernandeak11 Posts: 351 Member
    You should have immediately called your husband home from work to lift that box for you

    ...and then immediately log the calories you burnt while dialing the phone.
  • mamamc03
    mamamc03 Posts: 1,067 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    You should have known better......always duct tape your uterus befroe you lift! Duh! Saw that on TV! :huh:

    The good thing about this is that you don't have to get your vajayjay waxed later. :D
  • jayliospecky
    jayliospecky Posts: 25,022 Member
    Just be happy you didn't try to lift a ten-pound box of paper.
  • PinkEarthMama
    PinkEarthMama Posts: 987 Member
    You're instantly going to go into starvation mode.

    Drink all the powders today with heavy cream, and put in an extra 5 minutes at the gym.
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    Well, if your uterus is still in tact from that, and you decide to have children, never lift them! Those things are 8lbs on their way out, just think of how much they weigh when they get older!
  • myak623
    myak623 Posts: 615 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
    Well, since I picked it up from the ground, that's more like a deadlift, right? So I'm okay then?

    Maybe, did you check to see if a stranger used your scale? That might have an impact.
  • miranda_mom
    miranda_mom Posts: 873 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
    Well, since I picked it up from the ground, that's more like a deadlift, right? So I'm okay then?

    Maybe, did you check to see if a stranger used your scale? That might have an impact.


    Now that was funny! And extra points for the reference to yesterday.
  • NGMama
    NGMama Posts: 384 Member
    16.5 POUNDS??? POUNDS? Not ounces? Geez, you could have been killed! Imagine the internal bleeding. Please, go lay down and wait for an ambulance. This is very serious indeed.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    Check between your legs, it may have already fallen out. If you don't see it, it may have disappeared entirely. RIP Uterus.
  • moxleymama6
    moxleymama6 Posts: 532 Member
    My first kid weighed 11 lbs. I KNOW your uterus isn't going to fall out, seriously. Because I have 5 more kids to prove it!! Lift heavy, eat clean, & for cryin out loud do some KEIGELS!!!
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
    You're pregnant.
  • Umeboshi
    Umeboshi Posts: 1,637 Member
    You're pregnant.

    What was in that protein powder?
  • 12by311
    12by311 Posts: 1,716 Member
    So, I ordered a bunch of protein powder online, and it was delivered the other day. After I carried the package into the house, I noticed on the packing slip that it weighed 16.5 lbs! I've been told women shouldn't lift anything over 5 pounds. Is my uterus going to fall out now??

    That only happens when you squat with a barbell.
    Well, since I picked it up from the ground, that's more like a deadlift, right? So I'm okay then?

    For now. For the sake of your unborn children, don't put anything on your back and squat!

    *snort laughed*
  • 12by311
    12by311 Posts: 1,716 Member
    You're pregnant.

    What was in that protein powder?

    That's just ridiculous.

    You can't get pregnant from lifting protein powder.





    Wait, OP, did you sit on the protein powder after you got tired of lifting it?
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