single and looking

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Lifting_chick
Lifting_chick Posts: 275 Member
in Chit-Chat
ok so if a single parent has young kids, when they go on a date are they looking for not only a mate but a good mom or dad for their kids?? And so what is most important a good mate or a good parent??
Seems like people are interviewing dates as new mommies or daddies!!

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  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    Its pretty even but I think mate should come first because if I can't get a long with you then my kids probably won't either. Seeing how most kids emulate their parents anyway. If you are looking for a daddy or mommy for your kid first then I think you are making a mistake and the relationship will fail.
  • Meghan0116
    Meghan0116 Posts: 1,340 Member
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    Hmmm, I don't think about where the person would be a good dad for my son because he already has a dad. However, if it does progress I would need that person to understand the time constraints with my son and eventually at least love him.
  • SofaKingRad
    SofaKingRad Posts: 1,592 Member
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    If I were single going on a date I would look for compatibility first. But if things kept going, like it could become a serious relationship, it would not matter how compatible I am with that woman. If she doesn't want to be a part of my kids lives, then she's just a friend and will be nothing more to me.
  • odusgolp
    odusgolp Posts: 10,477 Member
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    Both. Some single people will seek out a parent for their children. Other's don't.


    I don't. My son has a father. I'm just not married to him.... anymore. Thank goodness. *LOL*
  • mummma
    mummma Posts: 402 Member
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    im not looking for a good dad for my kids, as they have their own lol. but i like dating men who have children of their own... as it gives me some confidence in that respect... plus i dont really plan on having anymore!
  • Z_I_L_L_A
    Z_I_L_L_A Posts: 2,399 Member
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    I'm not interviewing for the daddy job thats just the icing on the cake. My daddy Kung Fu skills are strong but so are the romantic skills too.
  • ItsMeRebekah
    ItsMeRebekah Posts: 910 Member
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    naw they prob just wanna have fun
  • ironanimal
    ironanimal Posts: 5,922 Member
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    You won't be a good parent if you can't enjoy eachother's comapany. Focus on you first of all, and see later how they behave with your kids.
  • SwtMelissa86
    SwtMelissa86 Posts: 165
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    I'm single... and I am not looking for a dad for my kids.. compatibilty is first... and of course, they have to be a good, kind person ...(and like kids!)
  • SofaKingRad
    SofaKingRad Posts: 1,592 Member
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    They wouldn't need to be a parent to my kid in a long term relationship, but they would have to be involved. I'm not going to be in a serious relationship with someone who my kids are not happy with because they don't want anything to do with them.
  • trhjrh06
    trhjrh06 Posts: 2,272 Member
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    I'm happily married BUT if I were single and looking. I'd want to find someone compatible with me. And not looking for a father for my child as she has one, BUT looking for someone who wants to be apart of my childs life and would treat her just important as their own children, or if they had a child.
  • dlpnrn2b
    dlpnrn2b Posts: 441 Member
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    I would never be expecting the man to become the father, my kids have a great dad..no need to have someone else fill that spot. In fact it would take me a while and I mean to the point of being "real serious" about him before I would even introduce him to my kids .

    On another note, my "daddy" who is really my step dad took my mom plus 3 small kids in and raised me from 3 years on and I could care less about the sperm donor.. So if there is no real dad and the guy is looking for that then by all means, it''s a wonderful thing!
  • Lifting_chick
    Lifting_chick Posts: 275 Member
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    My kids are older so I am almost done raising kids and am not looking for a new job, just seems like single people with young kids their main goal is to date and find someone to raise their family with.....
  • Alma_Sana
    Alma_Sana Posts: 453 Member
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    Mate first. . .at the end of the day its going to be you and the other person. Kids grow up and move out. If it's only for thew kids then what is left in the end??? Of course its very important they treat your kids well.

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