Help what to do about co-workers and pot lucks

MyaTala

This can be a big problem for me. I always seem to work at jobs that do pot lucks on a very very consistent basis. There always seems to be at least one coworker if not more then one that is obsessed with me participating in the pot luck. Honestly I dont wish to very rarely are these things full of food that's good for you.

How do you deal with those coworks that push and push until you finally break down and go for the table full of very naughty but oh so good goodies? It's hard to resist the consent "come on have a little" or" there's so much food you have to help". Or just have a slice of cake it wont kill you. I even had a coworker who got so fed up with me saying no thank you that she made me a plate of food. Does anyone know what to do in these situations? How do you shut these people down?

NCVF

Sounds like my job! I would recommend packing a really yummy but healthy lunch on the days they are doing this. Pack snacks. And do some mind therapy before you go in! lol. Meditate on your goal. I've actually been able to stay away from the PLs lately because I've already told myself in advance, DONT DO IT! LOL!!!

MyaTala

I actually tired that. I bring a lunch to work on pot luck days. problem is i work at a school so all the food is in the breakroom and when i sit down to eat my lunch i get those. Put that away and come eat the pot luck or eat that and then come have some of these treats. It's just one day. Sadly though these pot lucks never last just one day lol

wftiger

We have them all the time at my work. If I choose to participate I eat the stuff I can. My co-workers all know I won't eat the cake (even though I am bringing one to work for them to eat tomorrow) so they don't push me to do it. I eat the fruit and veggies and maybe a bite of something else.

I like the social aspect of our get-togethers and don't want to give that up so I have learned to eat in my boundaries. If you don't want to participate then go somewhere else when they eat. If it is too close to weigh in with my MD I skip and just go for a walk.

mirthegeologist

I would bring a food item or two to the potluck that i can share & that I can have a heaping serving of, like a leafy salad, a vegetable dish or a quinoa salad. That way, you are participating & you can show how healthy food can be tasty, too.

At work, one of my coworkers is a gluten free, dairy free, vegetarian. Several of us try to bring food items that she can eat, and since there is no meat, cheese, or butter, the food items are typically healthy. Over the past few potlucks, it's gone from a calorie fest to a reasonable indulgence. Perhaps you can slowly instigate change in the quality of food in your office potlucks?

Good luck!

ka97

On occaison I'll skip the potluck altogether, but it is difficult to avoid the social aspect of it. I'll sign up to bring something that I know I will eat, usually some sort of protein or stand alone dish. I will then eat that, and possibly any other clearly healthy options (e.g. salad, vegetable soup, fruit). This way I am in full control of what I'm eating, and I know exactly what I am putting into my body, but I don't have to worry about offending anyone by not participating. I pack enough additional snacks to round out my lunch in the event that I only eat the dish that I brought.
I don't have any issues as far as feeling pressured to eat food that I don't want. Early on I was asked a few times, I've politely refused, and everyone I work with has been pretty accepting. Be firm but polite, and consistent.

AshleyNStanley

I work at a plant and they always eat out here. Make it known you are trying really hard to lose weight and arent interested in eating anything bad. It was my turn to bring a snack for the night and they wanted pizza and I laughed and said Ok, fruit it is! lol

PunkyRachel

It sucks! I work childcare, parents always bring in treats for birthdays and holidays. We do family dinners, too. I just tell myself before hand how much I'm going to eat and set limits for myself. It's hard and I've fallen into to temptation, lots. Anyways goodluck!

xHelloQuincyx

if anyone tried to convince me to eat something i would just look them in the eyes and say no thank you im pleased with what i picked out, i thought that was the point of a potluck. but of course i would have already visited the desert table anyway :] just in moderation. my work always has doughnut holes and pastries, i just remind myself of how mad i was that i ate some of them the first time i logged the calories.

thinkpositive3

On occaison I'll skip the potluck altogether, but it is difficult to avoid the social aspect of it. I'll sign up to bring something that I know I will eat, usually some sort of protein or stand alone dish. I will then eat that, and possibly any other clearly healthy options (e.g. salad, vegetable soup, fruit). This way I am in full control of what I'm eating, and I know exactly what I am putting into my body, but I don't have to worry about offending anyone by not participating. I pack enough additional snacks to round out my lunch in the event that I only eat the dish that I brought.
I don't have any issues as far as feeling pressured to eat food that I don't want. Early on I was asked a few times, I've politely refused, and everyone I work with has been pretty accepting. Be firm but polite, and consistent.

^^^^^THIS! The only way to do it.

MyaTala

Thanks! This has been very helpful

HeHealsMe

When I was actively Nursing, EVERY week, without fail was a potluck.

I went to a co-worker's home ( a super dedicated, hardworking, considerate, detail oriented, nurse)
and saw her kitchen:grumble:
I had eaten her food
Needless to say,
NEVER EVER
have I eaten at another potluck.

You do not know
how ppl live
until you visit them.

Also, the pushy one's:grumble:

."You know, I have joined in several times, and I'm sure I will again in the future, but at this time, I will have to just decline your sweet offer."

"I'm sorry, I can't fit it into my schedule right now, but have fun!!"

"I think I am coming down with something (sniffle) and don't want to spread germs around."
"And, you might want to back up a little, 'cuz I'm feeling kinda nauseous right now...":devil:

WORKS 100% EVERY TIME!!!

socalmo

When my job has pot lucks, I make sure to bring a dish that I know that I can eat and I fill up on that item, and then get much smaller portions. If it is something that I know I should not have (i.e. macaroni and cheese), then I skip it. My co-workers know that I am using MFP and working toward weight loss goals, and so they're not offended if I do not take anything.

scloyd

We recently had a pot-luck for our last night of our bowling league. We brought a platter full of fruit-ka-bobs (skewers) with strawberries, kiwi and pineapple. I ate a couple of them and felt like I was participating in the pot-luck festivities.

388gigi

What's a Pot Luck ? I don't think these exist in Australia! :-)

tabulator32

I'm sorry. Social obligations go out the window when there is an office potluck and my health is at stake.

This is not my best friend's wedding party. Its an office pot luck. Some of which has been prepared by people who, as previously mentioned in this thread, have very questionable sanitation policies.

Y'all have fun and I'll bring my own lunch.

Let'em give me a hard time about not participating. THAT is when you see who your friends are.

Why in the hell should someone in your office give a crap about you participating in an office pot luck? If they don't understand, let'em stand confused.

tabulator32

What's a Pot Luck ? I don't think these exist in Australia! :-)

A pot luck is when everyone in a group brings a covered dish of food and everyone shares it, making a veritable buffet for the group.

Someone brings green beans and someone brings potato salad and someone else brings a gallon jug of tea. And on and on.

sweet110

I had a job like this. Healthcare, of course. For the first 2 years, I took the following tactic:

My rule was that I did not eat free/pot-luck food at work. Period. I know it sounds...harsh. But I am a big fan of "rules" to stop you from having to make the decision anew, every single time. I just said "no thanks." The word just flew out of my mouth without me having to ponder it. And kept saying it. And it became really easy, because my answer was always the same. I'd grab a cup of coffee or tea so that I could visually participate, but I didn't touch the food.

Then, in year 3, I took the "moderation" approach. I'd say no sometimes, but sometimes I'd say yes, just to treat myself. And...I gained weight. Because in a place where "free food" is offered all the time, even saying no 80% of the time means that you will still find yourself eating an extra zillion calories more than you should. And here's the thing: you don't really even want it! You're at work, not out with family and friends! Save your "luxury foods" for when you're not at work so that you can really enjoy them.

Its counterintuitive, but sometimes the mindset of moderation just requires too much mental energy (I said no last time, should I say yes this time? I know I shouldn't eat the cake, but its my supervisors birthday, should I eat the cake to be polite?) I go to work to work. Not to eat cheesecake. (that's what I would tell myself in my head. Especially when I really wanted that cheesecake.) And the good thing is, if you say no consistently enough, people will just get use to it and they will stop asking. If you say yes, they will continue to pressure you, again, and again, and again....people really do treat us according to how we behave. Even the annoying coworker who made you a plate of food. Just smile and set it down. Don't say a word. She'll get the picture. Eventually. If you let her force you to eat, she really will keep doing it. And she'll believe she's doing you a favor. I know. Le sigh...

smantha32

my work always has doughnut holes and pastries, i just remind myself of how mad i was that i ate some of them the first time i logged the calories.

THIS! I made the mistake of eating a couple cookies someone brought before I logged them and I was disgusted to realize that two cookies equaled half my calories for the day! arrg.

meshashesha2012

On occaison I'll skip the potluck altogether, but it is difficult to avoid the social aspect of it. I'll sign up to bring something that I know I will eat, usually some sort of protein or stand alone dish. I will then eat that, and possibly any other clearly healthy options (e.g. salad, vegetable soup, fruit). This way I am in full control of what I'm eating, and I know exactly what I am putting into my body, but I don't have to worry about offending anyone by not participating. I pack enough additional snacks to round out my lunch in the event that I only eat the dish that I brought.
I don't have any issues as far as feeling pressured to eat food that I don't want. Early on I was asked a few times, I've politely refused, and everyone I work with has been pretty accepting. Be firm but polite, and consistent.

this is exactly what i do. i pretty much did this in the past not because of watching what i eat, but because i tend to be really picky about my food.. if it doesnt look right, if i know that person doesnt wash their hands after using the bathroom, or any other thing that makes me not want it, then i'm not going to eat it.

i usually sign up to bring something i know i can eat like meatballs or a homemade bean dip with tortillas. that way i can still participate socially but not have to eat anyone's dodgey looking potato salad..

mrs_deg1983

I would take a could yummy but unknowingly healthy dishes. When they have ate it and liked it then tell them it was healthy. I like to make a healthy taco salad.

iKapuniai

Just say no. And if that doesn't work... scream it.

divinebird

If the coworkers are really bothering you about it, you could also go talk (privately) with your boss or HR. Let them know that it makes you uncomfortable and unwilling to participate at all when you feel bullied by others to eat. It's a kind of peer pressure that often gets overlooked. Let them know that you are working very hard toward becoming healthy and fit (I wouldn't say 'lose weight' because there is ALWAYS someone who proclaims that of course you don't need to lose weight) and that you need to feel supported in your actions.

Your coworkers probably don't realize how offensive their insistence might be. But if you have someone in a position of authority backing you up, the cajoling might stop!

Danielle2344

I have the same thing at my workplace. Except it's not pot lucks, it's carry-ins, which means there is food (snacks) sitting out all day long to graze on. I always felt the same guilt - people brought it in, so I should eat it, right? But since joining MFP, I've just said no or nothing at all & just avoided it. Is it hard? Absolutley!!!! But, as others have said on here, just looking up the calories for some of the things and realizing that by 8 a.m. (or earlier) I've already eaten a large portion of my calorie intake for the day almost makes me feel sick to my stomach. Did I really need that cookie & chips and dip for breakfast?? Nope. Now I just stay away from the food & don't even participate because once I start snacking, most likely I won't stop. I'm a sweets person - if it's a dessert or candy, I'll eat it just to eat it. The hardest part is when the food is in my area and everytime I get up from my desk, I see it sitting there and all the other people in the office getting plates full of food. I posted about this when I first joined. Some of the suggestions were to chew gum (which helped) and to listen to music to block out the others up here eating. Since yours is a pot luck, I'd bring in something healthy that you can eat, as others suggested, that way you can join in & know exactly what you're eating.

Burlesque12

You sure you dont work at my job?? Lol! You bring a healthy dish that you would enjoy and eat that & anything else that is healthy. If they push it on you, just say no thank you. Toss the plates they make you after they leave. They dont have bad intentions, but YOU HAVE to be in control of what goes in your mouth. My co-workers have finally stopped since they see my results now.

MyaTala

Thanks for the support and all the helpful ideas.

fabafter5

I stopped by a friend's house as she was making brownies for a Book Club Meeting. I watched as her cat walked all over her countertops, stopped to sniff the bowl etc. She then scratched the cat behind the ears for a few seconds and went back to mixing the brownies. There was cat hair everywhere!!! I simply refuse to eat at potlucks or any of the like! If I am ever tempted to pick at some food that came from an unknown source or kitchen I first think of this.

Gettinbk2me

Can you eat outside those days? That way you don't have to be around the food. Also ask them to respect the fact that you are saying no. Tell them to stop with nagging.

focus4fitness

I'm sorry. Social obligations go out the window when there is an office potluck and my health is at stake.

This is not my best friend's wedding party. Its an office pot luck. Some of which has been prepared by people who, as previously mentioned in this thread, have very questionable sanitation policies.

Y'all have fun and I'll bring my own lunch.

Let'em give me a hard time about not participating. THAT is when you see who your friends are.

Why in the hell should someone in your office give a crap about you participating in an office pot luck? If they don't understand, let'em stand confused.

word

focus4fitness

I stopped by a friend's house as she was making brownies for a Book Club Meeting. I watched as her cat walked all over her countertops, stopped to sniff the bowl etc. She then scratched the cat behind the ears for a few seconds and went back to mixing the brownies. There was cat hair everywhere!!! I simply refuse to eat at potlucks or any of the like! If I am ever tempted to pick at some food that came from an unknown source or kitchen I first think of this.

That makes me want to gag.

Pebble321

What's a Pot Luck ? I don't think these exist in Australia! :-)

It's a "bring a plate" occasion, a shared meal.

(I know that non-Aussies can get confused by our term - it means "bring a plate of food to share" not "bring a plate to eat off because I don't have enough plates for everyone"!)

To the OP - bring something healthy to share, load up your plate with that and try a little bit of something else that looks really good. Eat slowly, and if people keep pressing more food on you, you can say "thanks, but my plate is full up, I don't need anything else right now".

Bringing your own lunch or eating out might work sometimes, but it's good to have other ways to deal with it too, because these kinds of occasions will always happen whether you like it or not.