Emotional Eating/Binge Eating

cloud2011

I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food. I don't even really know where it came from, but I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guilty. I have already talked with her about it being hard not to eat all of the chocolate and so she has taken a lot to work and I have given a lot to friends. But I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it away. Part of it is really difficult too, because it makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away; like once it is gone my security blanket isn't there anymore. It makes me sad that I have to give it away because I can't eat a normal portion of it. It is dumb because it is *just* food, but yet it has so much emotional control over me.

My friend put it this way to me once: why should you be the human trash can? Putting chocolate into your mouth, not because you enjoy it (I really do, I love chocolate) and because you feel GUILTY isn't fair to YOU. Now, if you're just enjoying it, that's totally different. But if you're eating it out of GUILT and then gaining weight, how is that okay?

As for your mother, you said something interesting...you were upset that she didn't eat the chocolate. Why? The chocolate is food, that can go in someone's mouth, a trash can, or anywhere else. But you're under no obligation to eat chocolate just because you bought it, or someone gave it to you as a gift. And, your mother is under no obligation to eat it, because you gave it to her, or asked her to store it for you.

elle18287

I know it is really difficult to not eat when you are feeling down and overwhelmed, but just try to tell yourself that eating, right after you are done, you will feel worse. Try to do a tough work out when this happens, knowing oyu will feel better right after!

jcstanton

I wouldn't feel right with just throwing it away. I am one of those people that hates wasting food. I don't even really know where it came from, but I can't stand the thought of throwing out food... I feel sooooo guilty. I have already talked with her about it being hard not to eat all of the chocolate and so she has taken a lot to work and I have given a lot to friends. But I still feel really guilty about spending all that money and then just giving it away. Part of it is really difficult too, because it makes me feel really scared and depressed to give it away; like once it is gone my security blanket isn't there anymore. It makes me sad that I have to give it away because I can't eat a normal portion of it. It is dumb because it is *just* food, but yet it has so much emotional control over me.

One thing that has helped me is keeping myself busy. I don't mean just going for a walk or something because you just think about food the whole time you're gone, then when you get home, you still want to eat. What I have done is I keep a list of chores and special projects. When I start feeling the urge to binge, I eat a HEALTHY snack like raw veggies or a piece of fresh fruit, then I go to my list and pick a task...preferably something that requires me to think about something other than food. Usually, by the time I finish that task I'm past the urge to eat. If I'm not, I simply choose another task. I also try to watch that show Man vs. Food at least once per week. Watching that guy stuff himself to the point of bursting, and seeing how miserable he is afterward, reminds me of what I feel like after I've overeaten on junk food. I don't want that feeling, so I think twice about pigging out.

Secondly, you've GOT to STOP thinking about it as wasting food! Junk food is not food in the sense that it does not help our bodies, it hurts our bodies. It's like poison to your system. If your food had been tainted with some kind of poison (household chemical, antifreeze, etc...), you wouldn't keep eating it would you? Well, junk food is bad for you, too. It's not a waste to throw it away, it's a waste to buy it in the first place.

Mrsjenningsjr

I just recently overcame emotional eating...I didn't do it with therapy or anything like that. I simply told myself two things.

1. "My problem" would really like to see me eat junk, it wants the worst for me.
2. I will eat what I know I should, first, and if I'm not satisfied, I will allow myself to eat what I crave.

The "My problem" is whatever the reason is that is making you feel the way you do (i.e. my boss, my man, my financial struggles etc.). When we deprive ourselves we only want that thing more. Remember, you are your truest friend. Tell yourself, you will FIRST eat what's good, healthy etc., and if you're still not satified you will allow yourself to eat some of what you're craving.

It's work for me...I think it will work for you. Try it.

KattKitty

I believe that a majority of MY emotional eating is a control issue. I wish I could tell you how to overcome it, but I can not. I can, however, make a few points that may or may not help. I am a RULE FOLLOWER, but if someone tells me that I CAN'T do something, you had better believe that it burns my butt and it is written in my DNA to "prove them wrong". That is why I do not use words such as diet and cheating when it comes to my health plan. I find myself in a much better place when I release myself from the death grip of those mindsets.

I don't know what your religious affiliation is, but I feel the need to touch on the Spiritual aspect of things to address the GUILT. I am sorry if this bothers or offends. Romans 8 in the Bible is a great chapter of hope in this area. It starts off telling us that there is no condemnation in Christ and ends with the fact that we are more than conquerors. The chapter before it, though, covers the war that wages within our spirits. It is written by the Apostle Paul (the man who wrote nearly 2/3 of the New Testament and started his journey as a persecutor of Christ). In about verse 15, Paul goes into depth about how he wants to do what he knows is right BUT ends up doing the exact opposite. His struggles mirror those of the emotional eater.

Ours is a battle that goes way beyond whether or not to throw away chocolate. I believe that we are all born with the propensity toward certain negative/destructive behaviors (drinking, drugs, stealing, anger, overeating, etc) that will follow us throughout life. We can either give in to them and live life in defeat OR take each battle as it comes and hopefully, one day, gain victory.

Food may lead to a slower destruction than some of the others, but it is just as real, and you can't quit food "cold turkey". It is necessary for survival. Chocolate is NOT the enemy, and when I deny myself, I always go back to the original sin. A woman was told that she couldn't eat something in particular, and she gave in to the temptation. Plain and simple-- Hopefully, this wasn't just rhetoric for you. I have to go so I can't review what I've written. Fight the good fight!!!!! Run as if to win the race (1 Corinthians 7: something).

StrongerJess

Bump to read later

SherryP71561

Thanks so much for the reference in Romans KatKitty. I also struggle with emotional binge eating and my faith is my #1 priority to get me through. I will definitely be reviewing that chapter in the Bible. Thanks again!

wildcata77

First, throw out the chocolate!

Next, set a food budget and only use CASH for it. If you know you only have $100 a week to spend on food, head to the grocery store at the beginning of the week and stock up on both stuff to take for lunch and snacks. I wish I could stay away from processed food, but what works for me is replacing stuff I know I get cravings for with substitutes that truly work...like those 90-cal Nature's Valley squares dipped in chocolate would be a reasonable substitute for a candy bar.

I also love raw veggies and hummus, and greek yogurt. Just experiment until you find stuff that works for what you usually crave.

Gum works for me...for some reason I am more likely to drink water if I have a peppermint or spearmint gum in my mouth, so that helps.

I also bring a book to work and go outside and read after I get dojne with lunch...helps keep me from wanting to down something sweet right after I eat.

The most important thing is just planning what you will try when those cravings hit! And getting rid of your normal triggers. For instance, if we have stuff to make S'mores in the house I WILL make a microwave S'more every night until it's gone. So we don't buy them.

If you truly feel that you cannot overcome this addiction yourself, consider some medical intervention. I take low-dose Prozac for depression/PMDD, and actually find that it decreases my need to snack. Anti-anxiety meds or seeing a hypnotist could also help for someone that is truly suffering an addiction that they feel they cannot overcome on their own. Good luck with your journey!

patchesgizmo

get the bad food out of where you are living. To me if it is in the vicinity I will eat it because I fixate on it. Throw it away, give it away just get it out of the house! I crave it so bad myself, but if I want it I have to leave my house to get it, and I won't let myself do that. At work it is harder because there is a candy machine on my floor and a cafeteria in the building.

Each day is a struggle, I have yet to overcome, but for every peice of chocolate you want, eat a grape or an orange or a banana or something else. That is what I am currently trying and it seems to help.

Good luck

Teresa

ShilohMaier

I have not read everyone's response to this posting, but I'm pretty sure I might be offering you a different insight into this problem. I was having some SERIOUS food addiction/emotional eating problems. The first thing I decided to think about was the "emotional" part of "emotional eating". I recognized that my emotions were eratic, and I was alwasy feeling anxious and just plain "off" all the time. The only thing that kept me feeling calm was chocolate/sweets. It was a definite addiction cycle, because as soon as the insulin inevitably crashed, I was having to stuff my face with chocolate again to maintain normalcy. So I thought about what might be making me anxious. And you know what? The only thing making me anxious was the chocolate- the constant thinking of it, the guilt of eating it, the inability to NOT eat it. So I talked to my doctor, we went over the way I felt physically and emotionally during these intense periods of anxiety & craving. Ran some blood work... realized I was seriously insulin resistant from PCO. Oh yeah, and I'm hypothyroid. Nice. But I also had answers to my weight and emotional problems.

Insulin and thyroid are pretty key hormones. They effect everything from mood to weight. My body was experiencing some severe adrenal fatigue from all of my hormones being so out of whack. Once I got on meds for my thyroid and insulin, everything changed. I don't even think about sweets, even if I see a huge box of donuts. Sometimes I think "yeah, some chocolate sounds good"... but it's not a consuming drive. I'll eat a couple of bites, and do the most amazing thing- I wrap up the rest and put it in my desk drawer and forget it's even there!!!

Talk to your doctor. Tell him how you're feeling. And something else that helped me- regarding KattKitty's posting, if you're so inclined, read The Weigh Down Diet. I will not get into it here, because I know faith being discussed in an open post is frowned upon on this site, but if you want to chat about it feel free to message me.

opalescence

If you cant throw it out, hide it from yourself or your eyes. Out of sight out of mind. I have a place in the top of my freezer for chocolate that I dont "see" everytime I open the fridge. I know its there for when I really need it but not showing itself saying eat me all the time.
In my plan I couldnt go completely clean or stop eating this and that, nothing is off limits but only in moderation, if I dont eat what it is I'm craving I will eat everything until I get whatever I'm craving.
My best advice is write it out, write about everything. how you feel with it being there, how do you feel when your wanting it, how do you feel eating it. what makes you want it if your not hungry, could it have been you were hungry for a meal but instead snacked? My journal has given me more insights to my eating patterns and feelings than my therapist ever has.
You have to keep finding ways to outsmart yourself, if it works today it may not work tomorrow.

Symonep

I think the first step would have to be to own the behaviour and stop feeling guilty for it. Maybe a journal would be a good start, don't try and stop the binging but journalise what is happening when you feel like binging and your feelings surrounding it. I think a lot of people are too scared to own their feelings and deal with them, they are like the monster under the bed. Though the same as with kids once you turn the lights on there is nothing to be scared of. Once the feelings/monster under the bed is faced, the anxiety and stress is usually dispersed. Learn some relaxation techniques, deep breathing, maybe try some affirmations (they work for some). I think once you have more connection with your feelings and learn how to identify them and the cause you can work on the over eating a bit more. Please stop feeling guilty about it all, it just leads to more destructive behaviour, remember tomorrow is a new day, and as such the slate should be clean when you step out of bed.

I am sure if you look online you can find various things to help you start this journey.

Redbird99ky

To any who suffer from emotional eating / binge eating / eating disorders, there is a website, www.therecoverygroup.org that is an online group. It is a 12 step program online for Overeaters Anonymous. They go through the 12 steps once a quarter onlline. I think they also have online "meetings". I don't know about the people there, other than the 12 step work seems pretty good. I came across them when I was looking for some online help with my 12 step (AA) work.

Emotional eating / binge eating / eating disorders can oftentimes be rooted deep within us, and many people who are emotional eaters have similar issues/personalities as alcoholics. It is so much so, that Overeaters Anonymous has adopted the bigbook (Alcoholics Anonymous) and the 12 and 12 (The Twelve Steps and the Twelve Traditions) for their groups. There is alot of hard work and self examination involved in a 12 step recovery program, but the end result is a freedom that you never dreamed possible. This freedom is yours for the taking, but you REALLY HAVE TO WANT IT to get it. If you think you may be struggling with a food addiction (I think that being proud of eating a candy bar without your spouse finding out qualifies) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do yourself a favor and check out the website I mentioned.

The biggest help I have in my recovery is God's ever loving grace and mercy.

I can't ... HE can ... I think I'll let HIM ...

jodilo88

I did a lot of emotional eating when I was still living with my alcoholic father. Nowadays, I'm combating that with low-calorie things that are food, but *GOOD* food. It's not necessarily a "fix" to emotional eating, but it does put a lot less on to eat one of Edy's fruit bar popsicles than a piece of cake...

tobykang

To any who suffer from emotional eating / binge eating / eating disorders, there is a website, www.therecoverygroup.org that is an online group. It is a 12 step program online for Overeaters Anonymous. They go through the 12 steps once a quarter onlline. I think they also have online "meetings".

Thanks so much for the resource! I will definitely check this out.

I started binging in college, I recall shoving my face close to midnight when I'd be studying and stopped at 12AM because it was a new day and I had to be 'good'. 6 years later it's still a struggle I face but I've made some significant changes:

1) Consulting with a nutritionist I eradicated the words 'cheat meal' from my dictionary completely- it sets people with BED up for failure.
2) Avoid absolutes- "since I worked out today I should good all day" vs "I had a piece of chocolate therefore I should devour all high carb foods in sight and I'll just workout tomorrow"
3) If you're watching TV, walk around during commercials. It's normally food I wouldn't even crave for but I find myself looking for it eventually
4) Prayer
5) Mindfulness based stressed reduction - Jon Kabat Zinn emphasizes on slightly meditative yet more contemplative on being in the moment, constantly focusing on your breath. What I love is it's taught me not to fret about things that have happened or could happen but to be in the moment which is really all you have control over (okay sounds pretty hippy but it's not as bad as it sounds)
6) Be honest with your family about your condition and ask them to help you i.e. no buying the food you know you'lll seek when you want to binge. Tell them ways they can help you "hey if you want icecream go eat it in the mall please don't bring it home"
7) Written food diary which I also use to evaluate hunger levels and use to note what moods I was feeling, why I feel like binging (crappy day at work? just because?) what I could do to block it etc.
8) Capture, Challenge Change- capture the fact that you want to binge, challenge it and change.
9) Don't walk past the food aisles you know will torture and propel you to binge -really don't do it.


What kills me most is when people say people with BED have no self restraint. That is absolutely false as for folks with BED food is usually used to fill a void of some sort. if anything I've noticed that some 'addictions' are replaced with others. When I quit smoking, I started binging.

janessafantasma

I embody compulsive and impulsive overeating. I have fairly bad ADD and my brain simply cannot tell my body that I'm full. It might sound like a lameass excuse but all my doctors back me up. Also, with my ADD, as soon as I think about a food, I ruminate and can't stop thing about it until I get to eat it. My medication helps with my impulsive and compulsive behavior and has helped with the overeating, but there are days or weeks and sometimes months that I don't use my medication and on days like today, food was a constant on my mind. It was a beautiful day today and I kept myself as busy as possible, laid by the pool, ran errands with a friend, worked out, swam, played with my dog and as soon as I thought about the tasty organic cookies I had, I ate one. I didn't let myself ruminate or try to beat the craving. I ate what I wanted and moved on. I find that when I try to beat the craving or ignore it or eat something else that's healthy to try to "cure" the craving, I just end up eating twice as much as I would have if I just let myself enjoy the food I wanted.