in need of advice

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  • va_va_voom
    va_va_voom Posts: 467 Member
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    I appreciate all the advice everyone! I'm not sure about flowers, she has always been vocal about a disdain for flowers but a lot of these are good ideas. I wish I was back in the states so I could do a lot of them. It would be great to rekindle our first date but unfortunately I'm in this terrible terrible country of bahrain. So I guess I'll have to be a little creative. Thanks again!:smile:

    I figured location would inhibit your ability to re-create the first date thing. I hope you figure out what you can do that will help you all reconnect quickly and with as little awkwardness as possible. :)

    Oh - and I forgot to say it before, thank you and your wife for your service. God bless!
  • Eleanorjanethinner
    Eleanorjanethinner Posts: 563 Member
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    It's sweet that you're thinking about the situation and what you can do to ease the awkwardness. It shows that you're thoughtful and caring so good for you!

    I'd say that no matter what you do it will be odd being back together again and having to get reaquainted. I'd openly acknowledge that to my partner and say things like 'really looking forward to getting to spend time with you again'.

    Don't get her flowers if she's said she doesn't like them. If you can't think of any 'treat-y' thing she'd like (anything at all - choc, a cute toy or gadget, expensive body lotion - something that she'd admire but not buy for herself) then don't fret about getting something.

    A card with some honest thoughts about how you love her and miss her might go down well, depending on her personality (it'd probably make me tear up!).

    A meal is a good idea (and wine if you can get it... not sure what the situation is in Bahrain) but make sure you have 'proper' conversation, not just small talk.

    What about giving her (or each other) a massage (with no extras!). I wonder if diving straight into bed might be a bit much and it might be a good idea to reaquaint yourselves with each other's bodies (especially as you have a new one).

    I think you need to take things slow and realise that it'll probably take weeks for you to settle down together again, get to know each other again etc. It's going to be *really* weird for your wife seeing you after your weight loss - you'll probably feel like a totally different person to her. You might well have some arguments as you re-negotiate your relationship.

    Good luck and have fun!

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