Worries I have...

TeeA86

Hello I have pretty much always been on the chucky side. The last two years I hit the 200 pound mark and realized that I needed to do something. I always try and mess up and then I just give up all together. I am comfortable but in the same breath uncomfortable with myself. I think I have just accepted that I will always be a big girl. I have this fear of losing weight and then having all of this hanging skin since I do have strecth marks from having a child. Does that shrink some? How do you all stay modivated even after mistakes? I also worry about losing 30 pounds and just gaining it all back.

shewhowrestleswolves

Hi, I also recently neared the 200 pound mark. I have had weight issues since I was a little kid. Lost it and gained it back probably 30 times. I don't think you need to worry about hanging skin. Mine has always been fine when I've gotten skinny. I want to lose 40 pounds. I go through the same ups and downs. Yesterday I found this sight and it looks like it will be a big help. So hang in there one day at a time. I just read a great book called Half Assed. You can get it from the library, Great motivator! Be good today!

surromom2010

It really helps to have friends on this site who will hold you accountable when you do screw up. Who will see your diary and say, "you better not pull that again tomorrow" or who will tell you to stop whining because tears don't use calories lol. I was worried about the loose skin thing too, (I have a 2 year old) but I found that your initial weight may make it look looser, but after you start toning it looks tons better than when you started.

TeeA86

@rocky.. I can say when I found this site back in 2011, it did modivate me to the fullest..... then Thanksgiving came around, then Christmas and Mardi Gras... I mean I kept indulging. We eat gumbos and everything fried, stews, and potatos, everything over rice... Its really hard because I love all of those foods. I was thinking 40 too but then I changed it to 30 to see how I feel after. I havent been under 170 in 9 years. I plan on setting little goals and accomplishing them slowly but surely. I am going to send you a friend request... I will def look into that book. Thanks.

TeeA86

@surromom2010... That makes me feel better. Thanks. And sending you a request... Dont take my diary too serious this week. LOL. I did have a Dr. Pepper and a Swiss Roll yesterday. I am addicted to Dr. Pepper and I was having a serious withdrawl, headache included.

JoAnn73

You cannot let fear keep you from achieving you goals of being healthy. Being a big girl for most of my life, I too made myself think I was comfortable with my weight. My heaviest was 398 and 2 years ago 298. What I have realized being overweight is that you tend to make yourself think everything is ok; you tend to deal or tolerate with certain things or people because you believe that you cannot do better. If you were truly OK with yourself, you would not be on MFP asking for our opinions, or advice. Your worrying over loose skin, ect is just another excuse your giving yourself as to why you should NOT do this. Do not let fear keep you from being TRULY happy with yourself, better yet don’t let fear keep from doing things you have always wanted to do. Sweetie I just turned 39 and I have four children that I love dearly, but I have been reborn. I cannot put into words how much happier I am. YOU CAN DO IT WE ALL BELIEVE IN YOU!!

TeeA86

@JoAnn... If I wasnt at work, I would be crying right now.... You are so right! Thank you. Thank you soooo much!

JoAnn73

@TeeA86 One regret that I have in life is leting MY weight be an issue for so many years. Dont do it I have missed out on so many things because of it and I have put up with so much crap because i didnt have self worth. Your so young,blessed and i know beautiful dont let fear win.

TeeA86

@JoAnn73.. Thats where I feel like Im going sometimes and I dont want that to happen either. Thank you for your encouragement!

Duck_Puddle

@surromom2010... That makes me feel better. Thanks. And sending you a request... Dont take my diary too serious this week. LOL. I did have a Dr. Pepper and a Swiss Roll yesterday. I am addicted to Dr. Pepper and I was having a serious withdrawl, headache included.

One Dr. Pepper and one Swiss roll is not cause for alarm. I too have tried and failed many times-and each "failure" was because I had in my mind that unless I ate perfectly 100% of the time, I was failing. I would then start on my "why even bother" parade and boom-back to eating crap 100% of the time. What has made the difference for me this time is in NOT setting an expectation of perfection. I set an expectation of finding what I feel I can reasonably sustain for the rest of my life. I overindulge at parties & special occasions, I eat hot dogs & mac&cheese or pizza when I am with my nephews, I eat bacon cheeseburgers sometimes because that's where my weakness lies. But I focus on eating better more often than not-and doing exercise that I actually like doing (not going from zero to p90x 4 times a day). I deny myself nothing-but find a way to work it in the best I can. Sometimes that means doing a little extra exercise, sometimes it means eating a little less other days of the week, sometimes it means calling the whole thing a wash and starting over tomorrow. But I have the rest of my life-one meal/snack/day/week of less than stellar eating does not constitute failure. It's life-and bad days happen. I'm now understanding that's it's what I do most of the time that makes the difference. So cut yourself some slack-maybe don't stress over a dr. Pepper and a Swiss roll. I sinned more than that already and it's only noon. Perfection is an impossible standard-and even more difficult for those of us that started a zillion miles away from perfection.

MinnieInMaine

@JoAnn73 - you are a true inspiration!!

@TeeA85 - not sure if this will make you feel any better but your fears are very common. All you have to do is go to the search function on the message boards and type in loose skin or stretch marks or similar topics and you'll find several postings. And not only are there these physical changes but many of us also have huge emotional barriers to get over.

As far as the loose skin goes - you may have some leftover but for the most part, I'm sure most of it will contract. Making sure you lose at a slow healthy rate (1-2 pounds per week), exercise regularly, stay hydrated and eat healthy oils all help a lot but as with most of our imperfections, genetics cuts the cards. You have to just let it be part of the process and not be a barrier for you, as JoAnn pointed out.

You can do this!

ETA: totally agree with vitamindd said too. As my wonderful friend pointed out recently, you have to accept failure as part of the process! AKA learn from your mistakes!

TeeA86

@vitaminddd... Thank you for encouragement! I do exactly what your saying.... I was going to do a fast, now Im planning on cutting all carbs, but reading yall post and other posts on here... I realize that I dont need to do all of that. So I will try to change my eating to healthy. No Mcdonalds double cheeseburger combos with dr pepper everyday for lunch. No more frying chicken or pork chops for dinner everynight. I will make my goals and I will take it one meal at a time and try not to give up when I do fall during my course. Thank you again.

TeeA86

@Nayshel.. Yes JoAnn is! I have to agree though it is some type of emotional excuse to not try. I am insecure about my marks and loose belly, but that shouldn't be an excuse. Thank for your support!