Exercise Addiction

DawnJanette

Hi,

Is anyone here experiencing 'Exercise Addiction'? I know we all love working out, but theres a point where it become a compulsion and everything else in life suffers.

My Partner is going through this at the moment, lying to me about how much he exercises & triathlons/other events booked, guilty feelings if he doesnt exercise, exercising on his own, controlling food intake. Literally nothin else exists except exercise.

He is not seeing the damage as its something he enjoys doing, but its really changed him and made him obsessive.

Just wondered if anyone else is in the same boat or can offer any advice as he isnt seeing the addiction and our relationship is really on its last legs.

Thanks

satrioprojo

Hi, I used to be in a same boat as you partner does, and i had reached a condition where i have to give up on working out due to diarrhea and muscle fatigue, even these situation did not stopped me from excercising and keep on running and do a lots of power lifting. However the thing that really changed me is that i started to appreciate new things that i missed in life by going to the gym. I learned a new hobby about photography and aero modelling, and i started to reduce my intensity for excercise. I still go to the gym but no longer spend like 4 hours for 7 days.

mandylooo

Poor you. I agree there is a point where it becomes unhealthy and lying about it is an obvious sign.

What have you done in terms of trying to talk to him about it? It's difficult without things getting heated, but you do need to try to talk to him without either of you getting angry and without patronising him too much "I'm worried about you". Try talking about what you both want out of life and make sure he understands this isn't a moratorium on exercise. Maybe even try to find something you can do together?

DawnJanette

I spoke to him the other night and said I thought he had an addiction. His reply was 'I guess I just have an addictive personality'. Last night I confronted him about the lying as he had promised me that he wouldnt do stuff behind my back and lie about it. I found out a couple of days before, but was giving him every opportunity to confess and didnt.

I said that he had hurt me and that if he continued he would end up losing his job, family and friends. He just nodded, but said nothing.

I've asked him to move into the spare room as his lies and compulsion is affecting me in a negative way. We haven't spoken since but I know he is doing a triathlon tonight and seems to have thrown himself into that.

It's really hard to admit that you are second best to exercise, but i really don't know how else to get through to him.

His attitude is that because he is making himself 'healthier' it can only be a good thing and that I am stopping him doing the one thing he enjoys. I'm the bad guy.

Help......this really is destroying me.

DawnJanette

satrioprojo........Can I ask what made you realise that is was an addiction and destructive? Was it just the illnesses?

What would you advise that I said to him (if anything)

Thanks

Mandyloo..... we had already agreed that the triathlons were something we were doing together, but I have been fighting a loosing battle trying to train with him as i'm not fast enough/train for long enough/go the long distances that he thinks he needs to do. Because of the constant argueing that I am holding him back, I have just let him get on with it. This has almost been feeding the addiction as he can now train alone and fuel his addiction. I can't win this one.