My mom think MFP is annoying...

Articeluvsmemphis

there will always be critics, keep going, simple enough.

AlexanderK1994

I hope your mum changes her mind. I can't really relate but my mum finds it ridiculous that me (and now my sister) weigh everything, even water (that's to make sure we get our 2l^^)

Mommahatch

I think obsessive tracking and losing weight is better than obsessive eating and gaining weight...........so focus on the positive, and ask her to please do the same. Good luck, and keep it up!

AlicynH

I haven't read all the comments, but one question. Is your mom overweight? I know my sisters are having a really hard time with my weight loss. I'm about the same weight as them now. We went camping this weekend and whenever I took a smaller portion or not finish what I took, they would give me a hard time about it.

I say, do what you're doing. If she doesn't like it, To BAD!!! Keep up the good work.

deannakittygirl

wow that's tough. sorry that you have to deal with lack of support from her. if I had that I would probably call her out on it privately. maybe she feels MFP is taking your time you would be spending with her. I know I am obsessed with this site, but I would rather be obsessed with MFP than mindless eating. my mom is supportive and is on here too. if you need support I would be happy to help if I can. feel free to friend request me if you like.

hutchy90

I am sorry this is happening to you. It must be hard with the lack of support from your mom. <33

apetrusha

I posted incorrectly...now can't delete....ignore this one :happy:

JuneBPrice

I don't know, my mom's the same way. She will make fun of me for obsessing about calories, then tell me that I'm a whale and that I need to do more laps in the pool. Just drone her out, that's what I do.

apetrusha

My mom thought MFP was stupid too. Now she's on here too and she's lost almost 40 lbs...

Yes! I like this post because I think the main reason people find it annoying or boring is they simply don't understand it. I suppose if I knew nothing about MFP and saw my daughter logging in as much as I DO (like - obsessively), I might think it was all a bit strange/silly. But when someone takes an interest on their own, like your mom did, it is no longer annoying - because they get it! Anyway, good for you and your mom!

samantha1953

Be respectful but firm that you want to be healthy for your life. Usually you can make good choices in any meal. I was around 50 when getting serious about weight loss and my mom always thought I was losing too much. I still had 30 ls to go to get to a good medical weight.

The others are right, you'll need to stop talking about it around her. We're your support here. We KNOW it works.

I loved my mom (RIP) but as an adult there were just things about me she didn't "get".

TheVimFuego

My OH used to be the same ("Just eat a balanced diet and get some exercise", etc) until she saw the results.

I used to justify my food choices but I found it a waste of breath in the most part. If someone wants to know I'll tell them what I am doing and point them in the direction of some research.

Your mum sounds insecure to be honest, just be the example and do what works for you

joconnor09

I had a similar problem with my dad for a while when I first joined MFP and started losing weight. I didn't realize how much I was talking about it, but I was really excited to find something that worked and I wanted to share it. Both of my parents are overweight (really, they're at least obese by BMI) and have never successfully lost weight. They used to be thin, so I think gaining all that weight really bothers them more than my weight ever bothered me because I've always been fat. Anyway, I wanted my dad to join me on my weight loss journey. He kept saying he was going to join me, so I kept asking him to go to the gym with me- something to do and a decent way to spend some time together! But apparently not to him. I guess he really wasn't (and to be honest, he still isn't) ready to lose the weight. He'd very happily tell me that I needed to lose weight so I didn't end up like him and have to fight it all my life. But he just didn't want any part of it. He still doesn't. I learned to just stop asking and stop talking about it in front of him. Now I only tell him when I've lost weight. I don't ask him to go to the gym or join me. It's sad, because I don't want either of my parents to develop preventable health problems. My mom at least exercises occasionally. My dad most definitely does not. But ultimately it's not up to me, and I just have to learn to go it alone. I think it's better almost, to be doing this without anyone else. Because then I'm not dependent on them. It's just me. I'm learning to be accountable to myself, to get my own butt to the gym and kick my own butt when I'm there. I think it's really hard for overweight family members and friends to see someone they've always known as overweight lose that weight. It might seem like it's changing who we are as people, or it might make them feel bad or like we think we're better than them. Even though none of that's true, it still might be how they feel. I don't know if it will really help, but maybe don't talk about it as much in front of her. Or, if you're up for it, have a talk with her and let her know how much harder it is to do this when you feel like she doesn't support you. She may not even realize what she's been doing.

lacrimosia

I haven't read all the comments, but one question. Is your mom overweight? I know my sisters are having a really hard time with my weight loss. I'm about the same weight as them now. We went camping this weekend and whenever I took a smaller portion or not finish what I took, they would give me a hard time about it.

I say, do what you're doing. If she doesn't like it, To BAD!!! Keep up the good work.

My mom is not as overweight as me. She is just 20lbs overweight, so she isnt that big though.

Nelliebird1430

You know what I tell people that think it's "annoying?" I tell them that I think they're annoying for not trying to support me on the journey I am on!! Keep it up girl, you can do it, and when you do.... Ask her how annoying it is that you're so fit and healthy!! Go get em girl!! :flowerforyou:

Ocarina

Your mom is having a guilt trip. I assume she's probably unhealthy or doesn't comprehend WHY you are doing what you do. Just sit down and explain to her what it's about. Trust me. I've experienced this with my parents. They'll think something is absolutely retarded one moment then it's their favorite thing in the world a few months later when it's the fad or they pulled their heads out of their aces. I do the same thing too.

ExplorinLauren

People are always going to try to drag you down. Always. Unfortunately its your mother... none of us know why... maybe you do, or maybe you don't? Maybe it really sucks that your mom is the one doing it!
The fact that you are trying to account for everything you do... take charge of your life, and better yourself... if she has a problem with that... there is DEF something wrong. That DEF deserves to be talked about...
But ultimately ... this is your decision... your life, and your MFP... and you should be allowed to do whatever makes you feel better about yourself... regardless of what she says.
The fact that she points you out in front of people as "being fat" then mocks you for trying to fix it... shows she has some deep *kitten* issues that need to be dealt with... you have enough problems on your own, without worrying about fixing hers!
You just keep on keepin' on!

Pwettiegrrltynk39_43_58

Not every1 going to accept the changes u are making in ur everyday life nor are they going to accept the paths in which u want to take so with this being said do what makes u happy and self worthy b/c at the end it is u who is going to have to live with the decisions u make in ur life...and as far as those who cant be supportive u know wat to do with them...but be nice while doing it though..:flowerforyou:

jordanreddick

It is annoying to her because you are actively doing something to help yourself and the attention won't be on you "being fat" if you lose weight, so to push back her issues with herself she is focusing on you.

caraiselite

ignore her, don't even talk to her more than absolutely necessary.

Keegansmum6

Keep doing what your doing! There will always be haters,plan and simple as that

fitniknik

Ive been on mfp for a year and a half now. Seriously just this weekend my mom finally told me she was glad I was taking charge of my health and that more of the family should do it too. Before this all I heard about was how I was obsessed and always did everything all or none and couldnt just get a good balance on things, or how I was getting "too skinny" and "I should just eat something and not worry about it." You keep doing what you are doing. Dont worry about them they will only make you think that trying to take control of your health is wrong, sooner or later they will see.

keep it up!!

losermomof3

My mom used to hide junk food from me when i was growing up, making it worse of course. Recently I had to live with her for a few mts, while my house was being moved, and I didnt dare go on a diet/healthy eating plan while I was there. Why??? Cuz she would be looking over my shoulder ever second pointing at every food item and showing me their values. Then she would tell me to work out...sooo annoying. Then she turns around and blames herself for me being fat growing up because of feeding us unhealthy meals and soda. ..UGH!!! I love my mom but I dont dare talk to her about dieting. She is not one I go to for support!!! I love MFP..this is what works for me!!!

AnAmericanGirl2

Jealousy and insecurity at it's finest.

jillica

Agreed. The less you mention that you are paying attention to your calories, the better.
If she asks if you want a 2nd helping of something, say you are full instead of "no, that will put me over on calories." Instead of saying, "i better eat a salad so I make my goal today", just say that you are craving a salad.
Good luck! Congratulations on your weight loss so far.

neverstray

This is an interesting topic. I say, just keep doing it.

I don't talk about it at all with most people. However, if I am out, and someone brings up dieting and losing weight, I'll usually share what I do. I have turned quite a lot of people onto this site. But because I never push it and never log in front of other people, no one sees it as an annoyance. If I go out to eat with people, I'll wait until I get home to log my food.

HollywoodDJ

Hmmm. Families are funny. You might be playing the role of the "heavy girl" in your family. So your mom might just find the focus on MFP annoying, AND it might be that she doesn't want things to change.

So, I would say, do what you need to do, don't hide it, but don't call attention to it either. You probably want her to share your enthusiasm, but for some odd reason (guilt, embarrassment), your mom isn't ready to do that.

Good luck, and the great thing about MFP is that you can find people who DO share your enthusiasm. Go for it! You're doing great so far, and you'll keep going : )

^^ I agree with this person. I have the same issue with my best friend, but opposite. She wants me to stay fat with her. She is heavier than me, we started trying to lose weight together, then she started getting upset I was loosing and she wasn't. I ended up just not talking about weight loss and MFP around her, she ended up stopping completely, so now I have no exercise/diet partner. I'm still friends with her, but not as close, just made her mad this week, cause she asked me to have dinner. I told her I had Zumba class and can have dinner with her afterwards. She just got pissy and said No offense but I don't want to eat that late.

So yea I feel ya

I can relate to all of you as well. I have had similar experiences as well. I have even been "THE FAT FRIEND" who wasn't real supportive and thought..."Oh she'll give up and gain weight and be my fat friend again".....and when that didn't happen and I saw how serious my friend and my sister were and the accomplishments they made...that's what triggered me to REALLY WANT IT FOR MYSELF. I have the drive and determination now and I am well on my way to my goal...120 days+ has been a great GREAT journey so far. ....Please keep yourself first but if it bothers her just don't log in front of her.

KEEP UP THE AWESOME WORK hun!

kitigonkukoo

She doesn't know how to support you. That's pretty much the bottom line. I've DEFINATELY been there!!!

She may not understand the effort it takes to do what you are trying to do, or she may subconciously resent you a little for trying to loose weight if she feels she needs to loose a little too. If she does, she probably feels a little guilty too, since she must want what's best for you over all.

It could be a mix of both.

Also- it may sound silly, but to some people, they simply find it insulting to question their meals. They feel like you are "screening" their food and their choices, and who likes to be judged?

I think you should try to have a short, but honest conversation with her, covering the fact that you are doing this for your health, and you know she's aware that you need to loose weight.

Tell her that you need her support to be successful, and to not take it as an insult if you are "calculating" her food. It's not about her, it's about you, and what you need to take on this gauntlet.

Loosing weight is H-A-R-D, because it's 80% MENTAL. You have to stay in control of your thoughts, ingore negative people, and focus on motivating yourself.

If she still doesn't understand, maybe try cooking some of your own meals, or offer to cook dinner for everyone now and then, so you can control what goes into those meals.

If she's anything like my father was, you may want to ask her to show you some of her recipies, and try out new options with her, so she's involved.

Also, if she cooks with certain things a lot, why not research the nutritional value of the items, and add them in and just check them off, updating the portions, so you don't always "appear" to be calculating everything.



I think it's GREAT that you took charge of your life, and 6lbs is AWESOME!

amoffatt

ahhh yes! People dont think I lose weight the right way... watch what I eat and exercise. For some reason if I am not taking a magic pill, shake or diet plan, its all wrong! GRRR... I feel ya!

jenluvsushi

Misery loves company...I'm betting that your mom isn't super fit, right? Most of the people in my life have come to realize/accept that I am really into MFP and being healthy in general....if they don't like it, they can take a hike because nobody is going to stop me. I don't care if I annoy them or not. I don't try to sell them my way of life anymore though even though I would love for them to join me. I find that anything dealing with hard work and lack of a quick fix falls on deaf ears anyways. My mom can see me dropping tons of weight by eating right and exercising yet she still talks about doing stupid fad diet....I mean, really? THIS IS YOUR ONE AND ONLY LIFE (depending on your religion, lol!)...DO YOU! Don't worry about her views about this...keep on logging and doing right for yourself. If her nagging you is really getting to you, log in private. Or even better, sit her down and tell what this means to you. If she loves you and wants the best for you, she should support you!

mogriff1

People who don't understand the healthy lifestyle and why you are doing what you are doing can be 'annoyed' by your devotion and focus. They just don't get it, so to them it's pointless and a waste of time. My mom used to say I was 'obsessed' with working out and logging into MFP, and I'm about to turn 39 years old and my mom lives in a different state for crying out loud! LOL She just didnt get it.

Now that I've hit my goal and am feeling so much healthier, have more energy and look great in my clothes, she is now motivated and inspired. She wants to start working out, join a gym and eat healthier. Now she gets it. Maybe yours will and maybe she won't. Just keep doing you! If she can't share in your journey, keep it to yourself and those that can relate.

Best wishes.