Best Internal Email of the Day

mruntidy

I work for an insurance company and you'd think some people had a bit more sense than to send this to an entire building of people......

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Hi everyone

The gentlemen who works at Star News across the road has just advised me that someone has left there keys in there motorcycle and wanted to know if it was anyone at ***, if it is can you go and see him.
Blue Honda Firestorm
Reg: BD0***M

Thanks

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Seriously sometimes I worry - lets see some of your mails as this made my day

MassiveDelta

did you take it for a spin?

mruntidy

did you take it for a spin?

I wish, i just checked the bike on google it's a nice bike!

painthoss

We got a company-wide email announcing that so-and-so would be out on Maturity Leave.

Miss_dannii

I work for a music company and we had a guy make a fake receipt (extremely obviously fake) and email it us and say his baby grand piano had broken and he had to fly to the states to have surgery and had a lear jet on standby and he'd expect his new replacement piano to be delivered before the surgery. We put his Belfast address into google maps and his house was a little run down bungalo in a council estate. How did he ever think he'd get away with that... I'm off now to try find the email, it was emailed to the whole company for all of our amusement..

Miss_dannii

Hi,



[IF YOU CANNOT ASSIST: Please forward me to the relevant department/employees/international customer support agent(s)]



I have purchased your ** piano and I expected great quality from all of my other products from ** however I have not been met with that standard of quality!



My piano does not turn on after using it for about a month now, it was fine but it doesn't seem to work regardless of what I try to do to resolve it; though even when it was working fine, power would randomly go off and on.



I have attempted to return it to the retail store but due to the distance (approx. 250 miles) I can't get there and they aren't accommodating with collecting it etc (I only purchased it a month ago but due to illness I haven't even had the chance to get out of bed to use it)



The boxing was intact, no signs of tampering etc. This has clearly passed through your random quality control checks.



I am currently preparing for a medical visit to the United States (16 hour operation) - I've booked a pilot for my Learjet to leave within the next few days, I just need to call and confirm the time I would like to leave the country at. During my stay, I can return the unit to you.



I am honestly, very, very disgusted at this.



I have scanned my proof of purchase for initial confirmation for Roland that I posses the unit.



I would like to resolve this in a mature and appropriate way, I'd rather now have to go through the means of legal support due to my illness, I'm not the same, strong soldier I used to be.



If there is a way you can receive my unit in the mail and ship a replacement TO MY HOME IN THE UNITED KINGDOM I would be greatly appreciative, like I said, legal action is something I would like to avoid.. but something I will uptake if needs be.



Kindest Regards,

ErinBeth7

Hi,
[IF YOU CANNOT ASSIST: Please forward me to the relevant department/employees/international customer support agent(s)]

I have purchased your ** piano and I expected great quality from all of my other products from ** however I have not been met with that standard of quality!

My piano does not turn on after using it for about a month now, it was fine but it doesn't seem to work regardless of what I try to do to resolve it; though even when it was working fine, power would randomly go off and on.

I have attempted to return it to the retail store but due to the distance (approx. 250 miles) I can't get there and they aren't accommodating with collecting it etc (I only purchased it a month ago but due to illness I haven't even had the chance to get out of bed to use it)

The boxing was intact, no signs of tampering etc. This has clearly passed through your random quality control checks.

I am currently preparing for a medical visit to the United States (16 hour operation) - I've booked a pilot for my Learjet to leave within the next few days, I just need to call and confirm the time I would like to leave the country at. During my stay, I can return the unit to you.

I am honestly, very, very disgusted at this.

I have scanned my proof of purchase for initial confirmation for Roland that I posses the unit.

I would like to resolve this in a mature and appropriate way, I'd rather now have to go through the means of legal support due to my illness, I'm not the same, strong soldier I used to be.

If there is a way you can receive my unit in the mail and ship a replacement TO MY HOME IN THE UNITED KINGDOM I would be greatly appreciative, like I said, legal action is something I would like to avoid.. but something I will uptake if needs be.

Kindest Regards,

Wow...that is so obviously fake, I would not even need to see the receipt.

JustJennie1

That's funny and obviously fake. Someone who was serious about writing a letter to a company wouldn't use "etc" so many times. My response:

"I am sorry that you are unhappy with the product but we can not replace your broken piano without it being returned to us. Please feel free to ship the damaged product to our office and we will take a look and see if we can resolve the problem. If that is not possible then please forward me the name of your lawyer and I will get in contact with him to resolve this."

cnsmith2

Every 6 months they do appreciation days on Wednesdays here at my building. My company is broken up into different departments and so each department would get its own appreciation day where the HR assistant would bring bagels and donuts around in the morning with juice and then cookies or other various snacks in the afternoon.

One morning, over a year ago the receptionist was sending an e-mail out to everyone in the company to let them us know that there were leftover bagels in the break room, but she typed "beagles" instead.

To this day my boss and I (and many other people) have a little giggle whenever someone sends an e-mail about extra bagels in the lunch room lol. We demand beagles!

CallieM15

My boss just emailed me


" Is today over yet? Cocktail time?"


We have a great friendship.

TheRoadDog

I was sending out information to a guy I ride with and got this auto-reply:

"I will be out of the plant from Friday, March 23rd through Sunday, April 1st. I will return to work on Monday, April 2nd. Have a great day!"

It's July 2nd!!

rml_16

Well, based on the grammatical errors in that e-mail, I don't think that person is very full of sense.

Unknown

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ElizabethRoad

I was sending out information to a guy I ride with and got this auto-reply:

"I will be out of the plant from Friday, March 23rd through Sunday, April 1st. I will return to work on Monday, April 2nd. Have a great day!"

It's July 2nd!!

That's nothing, I got one the other day that said she would be back in January...

mruntidy

Well, based on the grammatical errors in that e-mail, I don't think that person is very full of sense.

I also face palmed at that too

SVCat

Not an e-mail but very funny...my ex-boss, when correcting someone on their work would, while doing the Star Trek salute as a pointing gesture...he would say, "It's not rocket scientist."

Would kill me each and every time.

cnsmith2

I wish more people had responded to this... I need a good giggle!!