Do you have this issue?

shivouel

Hello all! About six years ago or so, now, I weighed 115 lbs of pretty well solid muscle. I was 14 at the time and a Canadian kickboxing champ. I trained every single day for at least three hours a day. Then I got a severe knee injury that decimated all physical activity I could do. I went from that ^^^ to NOTHING. Fast forward six years, and I've managed to gain 40+ lbs. I see myself in the mirror and it's just not "me". I don't expect to see it and quite frankly it disgusts me knowing I've gotten to this point. Now that my body is sufficiently healed (minus any pain I may experience from extra weight in general [for each pound of weight a person has, there is 10 lbs of pressure on the knees!]), I'm proactively seeking a way to get back in to shape so I can start competing again.

Now, the real issue I am curious about is this: I know I want to lose weight, I'm working to lose weight, and I HAVE lost some weight... But when I see the change on the scale and with my body I start freaking out. I feel as though it's not something that should go. Sort of like anxiety loss. Am I making any sense? I was just wondering if this panicked feeling is normal when it comes to weight loss. I picture myself in my mind looking a certain way, I look in the mirror and definitely DO NOT look that way, and when I get closer to my goal I freak out.

ANY sort of insight on this would be greatly appreciated!

BeesKnees

I can't say that's "normal" persay, but there is a different normal for everyone. We all react differently. I know, for myself, I can be big into self sabotage. When I get close to my goal, I usually fall off the wagon a bit. Or if I have a really great week, and it's reflected in the scale, I can go into a self sabotage the next week. So it's something I am always working on. I still have not yet pin-pointed why I do it, just that it's something I do.
I am currently seeking out a counselor for mental health help due to some huge life changes (divorce), and will also try to tackle my weight issues, and the feelings of self sabotage I have.
Maybe the same might benefit you, as well? I always feel like there is more we can learn about ourselves, and grow from that information.

Good luck!

anneouel

When ever I lose a pound i feel great, awesome etc.. but at the same time I look at myself and think of how much more I have to go and get anxiety. Shes right each person gets it in a different way, some more then others. And some can deal with it better then others.
I don't deal with it in the right way all the time but you just slap urself in the face (i can take one for the team and do it for u if u want ...jk) and put your lemon..lion face on (grr)and put down the ice cream. ^^ and yeah think about how smexy you is gonna be struttin in the clubs with ur little black dress on and sexy calves (XD) making all the men whistle. And in the long run you will feel awesome.

Up and downs ... just gotta get back up... oh lawd chumbawamba song came to my mind.

love you

p.s. When ever I see change in my body (anything for that matter) i freak too... generally its cause im losing my bittys but still :P

shivouel

Anne, you're my favourite I love you too!

Amber82479

I don't think you're abnormal at all. I know that when I start approaching my goals, no matter how badly I want to attain them, I tend to start self sabotaging to keep myself from reaching that goal. I don't understand why it happens, but I know that psychological issues do happen when you try to lose weight, or conquer your demons in other areas too. You're not alone!

bpotts44

Hello all! About six years ago or so, now, I weighed 115 lbs of pretty well solid muscle. I was 14 at the time and a Canadian kickboxing champ. I trained every single day for at least three hours a day. Then I got a severe knee injury that decimated all physical activity I could do. I went from that ^^^ to NOTHING. Fast forward six years, and I've managed to gain 40+ lbs. I see myself in the mirror and it's just not "me". I don't expect to see it and quite frankly it disgusts me knowing I've gotten to this point. Now that my body is sufficiently healed (minus any pain I may experience from extra weight in general [for each pound of weight a person has, there is 10 lbs of pressure on the knees!]), I'm proactively seeking a way to get back in to shape so I can start competing again.

Now, the real issue I am curious about is this: I know I want to lose weight, I'm working to lose weight, and I HAVE lost some weight... But when I see the change on the scale and with my body I start freaking out. I feel as though it's not something that should go. Sort of like anxiety loss. Am I making any sense? I was just wondering if this panicked feeling is normal when it comes to weight loss. I picture myself in my mind looking a certain way, I look in the mirror and definitely DO NOT look that way, and when I get closer to my goal I freak out.

ANY sort of insight on this would be greatly appreciated!

Alot of us used to be superfit athletes. You caught it pretty quick and at a young age. Feel lucky your knee is healthy enough for exercise. You were a kick boxer so you are obviously pretty tough. Just make a nutrition and exercise plan and go at it. You know what to do.

blair_bear

Same here. After an knee injury I had to abrubtly halt running competitively and eventually all together. I gained a lot in the interum and it is totally depressing, especially when you don't lose as fast and become as sleek as you did in your teens and 20's. I know so much about my sport from being in it from the time I was knee high to a duck that I decided to start a running club and a program for underpriveleged kids where I can help coach kids/people on form, cadence, etc... I have been very slowly getting back to my old self and having the other runners around really helps best of all giving back is such a positive feeling I am always on a high no matter what I see in the mirror.
Maybe one of your old gyms will let you help coach a kids program and you can work on getting back while giving back.