I'm not sure where else to throw this topic..
AmyFett
Posts: 1,607 Member
But it's been on my mind. I'm someone who has a good 75-100 lbs to lose. It really kills me when I see you girls who are like 130-140 (sometimes even less than that) thinking you're fat. You're not fat! I'm fat. At 225 lbs and 5 ft 2. I am fat. You are not. Be happy you never got this huge mainly from something way beyond your control. That's depressing. You girls complaining about like 5-10 lbs to lose, it's just sad to me. I would love to even be down to 170-ish. I would never complain again. I'm not blaming my weight on my disease, I had something to do with it as well. But mostly, it's not my fault. I was never 'skinny' in my adult life, but I also wasn't this big until recently either. It's just really sad :brokenheart: I'm done venting.
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I think everyone is different though and everyone has a weight they are uncomfortable with. Myself, I don't have much to lose and it affects me in everyway (my confidence, social etc). Probably as I compare to what I was like this time last year (a stone lighter) Although i'm a healthy weight, I do not feel it.0
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I'ts called body dysmorphia, I have learned to embrace it.0
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But it's been on my mind. I'm someone who has a good 75-100 lbs to lose. It really kills me when I see you girls who are like 130-140 (sometimes even less than that) thinking you're fat. You're not fat! I'm fat. At 225 lbs and 5 ft 2. I am fat. You are not. Be happy you never got this huge mainly from something way beyond your control. That's depressing. You girls complaining about like 5-10 lbs to lose, it's just sad to me. I would love to even be down to 170-ish. I would never complain again. I'm not blaming my weight on my disease, I had something to do with it as well. But mostly, it's not my fault. I was never 'skinny' in my adult life, but I also wasn't this big until recently either. It's just really sad :brokenheart: I'm done venting.
i TOTALLY get what youre saying...
youre beautiful btw.0 -
If we "girls who are like 130-140" don't watch our diets and exercise now, then we will end up 75-100 lbs over weight. I don't think this is a fair complaint. You should use this as motivation to want to be 130-140 lbs. Who knows, when you get there, you may end up being one of those girls yourself
Everyone is different and being uncomfortable with yourself (regardless the amount of pounds you are over weight) is motivation for some people to get healthy- not just loose weight. 0 -
I get where you're coming from. I feel that way sometimes too. Then I think, "why should I even worry about it?" I am here for me so I don't even pay attention to girls who are thin and still feel they need to lose more. I like to engage with those that have similar goals or more to lose. I feel I relate better to them because the journey will be similar.0
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Some of us who are within that range now never used to be either; and I still feel fat and I still feel like I can improve on myself, so I am not ready to stop. You'll be there eventually and you'll see for yourself.
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Someone at a lower weight is struggling as much as someone at a higher weight. It's still the same struggle.
I should feel bad because I have only 25lbs to lose? Not really fair, because it's a struggle for me too.
Best of luck. :flowerforyou:0 -
I understand where you are comign form. My highest weight was 255 at 5'5". I am still about 212lbs and have 65-75 lbs to lose. Somtiems I do get frusterated at women who want to lose only 10lbs but there comfortable body weight is not for me to judge. I just try to be supportive of eveyoens goals as long as I feel like they are being healthy.
Perhaps you shoudl friend people in your weight range so you can share in your mutual goals.
Good Luck!0 -
I think it's something where many people are never completely happy. I'm 148 now, and I'm overall pumped, although I'm not crazy about mommy tummy. But I figure either persistence and time will work in my favor, or I'll deal. I'm happy with things overall, and that's what matters!0
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I would make you very sad. All I want to lose is 3lbs. I am 123lbs.
I am not happy with how I look. I am very thankful I never got very large, but I still struggle with food everyday.0 -
If we "girls who are like 130-140" don't watch our diets and exercise now, then we will end up 75-100 lbs over weight. I don't think this is a fair complaint. You should use this as motivation to want to be 130-140 lbs. Who knows, when you get there, you may end up being one of those girls yourself Everyone is different and being uncomfortable with yourself (regardless the amount of pounds you are over weight) is motivation for some people to get healthy- not just loose weight.
Totally agree!!0 -
I totally understand where you are coming from. My younger sister tells me I am fine the way I am but she says she wants to loose 5 pounds and she weighs 122. I weigh like 40 more pounds than she does so she should take her own advice right? I told myself I would be happy at 170, then it was 160 and now that I am at 160 it's 150. When will I stop? :grumble:0
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Some of us who are within that range now never used to be either; and I still feel fat and I still feel like I can improve on myself, so I am not ready to stop. You'll be there eventually and you'll see for yourself.
Definitely this^ . I do know where you're coming from, I started at 200 pounds at 5'3, and would in no way call myself fat now (at 140), however I do still have a ways to go before I get to where I want to be. Just think, if we can do it you can do it too!0 -
But it's been on my mind. I'm someone who has a good 75-100 lbs to lose. It really kills me when I see you girls who are like 130-140 (sometimes even less than that) thinking you're fat. You're not fat! I'm fat. At 225 lbs and 5 ft 2. I am fat. You are not. Be happy you never got this huge mainly from something way beyond your control. That's depressing. You girls complaining about like 5-10 lbs to lose, it's just sad to me. I would love to even be down to 170-ish. I would never complain again. I'm not blaming my weight on my disease, I had something to do with it as well. But mostly, it's not my fault. I was never 'skinny' in my adult life, but I also wasn't this big until recently either. It's just really sad :brokenheart: I'm done venting.
I understand, but I could say the same to you. At 376 pounds, your 225 pounds sounds "small" to me.
No matter the size, if someone is unhappy with their current size and are willing to work on it in a healthy manner, then I support them and are not offended by their self-assessment.0 -
just because you're 130 pounds doesn't mean you're healthy.0
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Honestly I kind of get both sides of this. I used to be almost 300lbs, and at half of my old weight I still see myself as a whale most of the time. Yes, some of it is a mental health issue, some is a remainder of my whole fat life, but it also comes with being well... human. I have my last 10lbs to go, and you know what, after that I'll likely still friggin' hate myself.
It's not fair to say "at least you've never been this many hundred pounds" just as much as it's unfair to say "at least you've never been used to eating what you want and looking amazing and now everything has changed" or whatever. It's hard NOT to do this when you've got such a bigger journey to take, but it's not their fault all we each know is our own personal battles. And what about the underweight, stick thin and weak? Their battle is perhaps the hardest of all, objectively. It's hard to gain wieght when food makes you feel ill. It's hard to see past the imaginary flubber on your bony body.
My Gran had her first panic attack quite recently. To me that's not even a quiver. I've had them last hours and I've lost consciousness many times. I don't compare the struggle because it's unique to each of us. I just see someone suffering in a similar way and feel their pain, not compare the degree in which it hurts.
Smile lady. You're pretty. And you'll get there.0 -
It used to frustrate me too, and sometimes it still does. I started out at 255 and 5'3", so I know what you mean...I would KILL to be 130-140 lbs. Everyone is different. I have a sister that HATES being over 115 lbs. If she goes even one pound close to that or over she kicks it into gear and loses it right away. I think that girls like this who struggle with being "thinner" and they don't see themselves as thinner ...some may have issues...and of course none of them understand our plight...but I don't think we understand theirs either.
Remember, this is MY FITNESS PAL and being HEALTHY......not MY WEIGHTLOSS PAL. They have every right to be on here too.
Not trying to play devil's advocate, just another perspective.0 -
I get where you're coming from... BUT
Just because you have a lot to lose doesn't mean that their weight loss "strife" is negligible. I used to kinda feel the same way you do. However, now that I am actually close to my goal (actually my 2nd goal because I already made my first one) I can honestly say that it is a LOT harder to lose when you don't have much to lose. It is harder to stay motivated because the losses come slower and you also have to be a lot more accurate and work a lot harder for it.
We are all here for a reason, but don't discount other people's problems just because you think you have a bigger one (no pun intended!)0 -
I too agree where you're coming from but I think you're being a bit harsh. People need to be a healthy weight for their height and they also need to feel comfortable in their own skin - if that means losing 100 pounds or 5 pounds then to them, it really makes no difference. There are of course some people who are already a healthy weight or are even underweight and claim they are 'fat' but this to me speaks of insecurities that the rest of us shouldn;t judge. Don't worry about other people, just focus on getting yourself healthy.0
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Somebody who weighs 500 pounds might same the same thing to you. It's all relative.:flowerforyou:0
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I get where you're coming from... BUT
Just because you have a lot to lose doesn't mean that their weight loss "strife" is negligible. I used to kinda feel the same way you do. However, now that I am actually close to my goal (actually my 2nd goal because I already made my first one) I can honestly say that it is a LOT harder to lose when you don't have much to lose. It is harder to stay motivated because the losses come slower and you also have to be a lot more accurate and work a lot harder for it.
We are all here for a reason, but don't discount other people's problems just because you think you have a bigger one (no pun intended!)
^^this
I was 244 and thought I'd be happy at 170. Then 170 came, and I thought "heck - why not 160) and so on.
Some of it is mental throwback to my fat days, and some of it is just feeling like if I've come this far, why not go all the way.0 -
Someone at a lower weight is struggling as much as someone at a higher weight. It's still the same struggle.
I should feel bad because I have only 25lbs to lose? Not really fair, because it's a struggle for me too.
Best of luck. :flowerforyou:
^ I got rid of 42 pounds and have 10 to go and it's still a struggle. They just aren't leaving my body.0 -
It comes down to the individual and how they see themselves. We all struggle, to be healthy that is why we are on here right? I have a beautiful sister in law and 3 gfs who all weigh less then 130 and they think they are fat, I see them as beautiful fit girls and would give anything to look like them. But they see girls smaller then them and wish they could look like them. Its a constant vicious cycle.
I weigh 137 now but I have been struggling for 3 months to lose the last 7-10. I use to weigh 167, but its because of determination, focus, preparedness and a commitment to a healthier lifestyle that got me here and what keeps me going. I wasn't born skinny, so when I look at thin fit girls I don't say how lucky they were they were born that way because most of them work everyday of their lives to look like that. They give me motivation to keep going because if they can so can I.
I wish you the best of luck on your journey.0 -
I understand what you are saying - this reminds me of when a smaller person (in general) complains about being "fat"....and then looks at their bigger friend and says, "you aren't fat." Now THAT annoys me! I feel your pain, but I do believe that weightloss at any size is a challenge for most.
Also, I remember when I WAS smaller and I thought I was FAT then.... so everyone has their idea of what their body should look like and sometimes it may be distorted.
It's definitely good to vent and to get things off your chest. My best advice is to tune it out and concentrate on your goals! Good luck!! 0 -
But it's been on my mind. I'm someone who has a good 75-100 lbs to lose. It really kills me when I see you girls who are like 130-140 (sometimes even less than that) thinking you're fat. You're not fat! I'm fat. At 225 lbs and 5 ft 2. I am fat. You are not. Be happy you never got this huge mainly from something way beyond your control. That's depressing. You girls complaining about like 5-10 lbs to lose, it's just sad to me. I would love to even be down to 170-ish. I would never complain again. I'm not blaming my weight on my disease, I had something to do with it as well. But mostly, it's not my fault. I was never 'skinny' in my adult life, but I also wasn't this big until recently either. It's just really sad :brokenheart: I'm done venting.
I totally get what you are saying.
She's not saying those with less to lose should not be here or feel bad because they have less to lose. She's just thinks that someone with that little to lose should not call themselves fat. When thinner people complain that they are fat, I constantly want to haul out my fat *kitten* or my flubby belly and say "DUDE, you think you're fat? I'll show you fat. THIS is fat. You're nowhere near fat."
I also don't think that it's the same struggle. Flame me, it's just how I feel.0 -
I'm 5'0"; 130 lb technically puts me in the 'overweight' BMI category. I'm just aiming to get to a mid-range healthy BMI and add a bit of muscle definition. Maybe I'm not 'fat', but I'm definitely not skinny or fit looking either; I'm sick of thinking things like, "I'll never look like that" or "I'm too short to be skinny coz I have to weigh so little". A few pounds make a massive difference to my small frame. Just because some people feel uncomfortable with how they look, and a small loss of 10 pounds is gonna make them feel better, doesn't give them any less of a right to be here. This is the type of attitude that gets skinny/fit looking people banned from gyms (http://newsfeed.time.com/2012/06/21/plus-size-friendly-gym-bans-skinny-people/).
In any case, because you have so much to lose, you should be able to pull bigger numbers than smaller people, which means your weight loss shouldn't take too much longer than theirs anyways. At least you can get to 140/150 and feel happy - it means your maintenance calories will be much higher than people like me >.<0 -
But it's been on my mind. I'm someone who has a good 75-100 lbs to lose. It really kills me when I see you girls who are like 130-140 (sometimes even less than that) thinking you're fat. You're not fat! I'm fat. At 225 lbs and 5 ft 2. I am fat. You are not. Be happy you never got this huge mainly from something way beyond your control. That's depressing. You girls complaining about like 5-10 lbs to lose, it's just sad to me. I would love to even be down to 170-ish. I would never complain again. I'm not blaming my weight on my disease, I had something to do with it as well. But mostly, it's not my fault. I was never 'skinny' in my adult life, but I also wasn't this big until recently either. It's just really sad :brokenheart: I'm done venting.
i TOTALLY get what youre saying...
youre beautiful btw.
I second that!!!0 -
I understand where you're coming from, and at times I have those thoughts too. But I also understand that it is possible for "thinner" girls to also have body issues, and I know that it is a lot more work and a lot harder for them to lose just 5 lbs when they're only 130 lbs. The less you weigh, the harder it is to take the weight off and the longer it takes...so it's definitely a struggle for them, as well. I am 100 lbs overweight, so I'm not a thin person talking from their angle... I just try to see both sides of it. I think everyone is always going to be comparing themselves to someone else, no matter their size..it's what people do. I definitely have a long ways to go, my goal is to hit 150, but yes I would love to be 120-130. You can always tell the different between thin and fit girls who complain about being too fat just to get attention, and those who complain about it because they really do truly feel that way.0
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We all have different goals and different starting places. This isn't a contest about who has the furthest to go. A person weighing 130 who wants to weigh 115 isn't any less valid than a person weighing 400 who wants to be 115. Not being where you want to be weight-wise just plain makes you feel too big when you think about it too much, no matter how much less big you might be than someone else.
Just like thinking about starving kids in Africa doesn't make you less hungry.
We're all pretty, here, and we all have similar goals: getting healthy. We also all go about this in different ways and have different plans and backgrounds, so we probably shouldn't be comparing ourselves to completely different people.0 -
Someone at a lower weight is struggling as much as someone at a higher weight. It's still the same struggle.
I should feel bad because I have only 25lbs to lose? Not really fair, because it's a struggle for me too.
Best of luck. :flowerforyou:
Even more unfair is that someone with same amount of weight to lose but lost it much quicker than me. Is that the same struggle? I am not sure. I am frustrated!0
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