Rock bottom

hetipt01

I think I've reached it,rock bottom. I'm beyond sad, and discouraged. I was just looking at a picture of myself and it finally hit me that I've stopped trying. I've gained about 10 pounds over the course of a couple months, thanks to yo-yo dieting. I just want to sit in a corner and cry, I feel like I want to give up. Of course, I know I wont, but this is the lowest I've felt about myself in a long time. I had been doing so well; watching what I was eating, exercising regularly... then something happened, im not sure what, but I guess I let life get in the way of being healthy. I dont really know, but either way, I'm sitting here at midnight panicking, because I want this weight off NOW, and i know that it wont happen that way. Im scared to try again. I had went so far, and now I'm back at square one. I dont want to go out where people can see me, especially the people who know me and will be able to see the weight i've put on. I can't believe I didnt notice it before, what was I thinking??
For anybody who is struggling, take my story as a warning, dont erase all your hard work and end up like me... with no self esteem.
blah :sad:

guidosgal

Hey you its OK to get down but do not get down on yourself you know that you can pick yourself up and get going again. You had a mistep and you can get back at it Rememebr life is like a dance and Misteps happen to all of us. To fail is to learn and to learn is to succeed. Keep going Hun :flowerforyou:

angiered

You can do this! 10 lbs isn't a fall, it's a stumble, and you caught yourself! :flowerforyou:

cnutbrown

It was when I felt like you do now that I decided to start my journey....and I used my feelings of being at my rock bottom and my low self-esteem to fuel the fire that I need every day to get through on track! :flowerforyou:

Use that emotion to run a mile or turn down a treat. After a while you will start to see results and then you will be able to use the 'feeling good and strong and beautiful' as motivation instead.

FireMonkey

Don't beat yourself up. This happens to everybody in some aspect of their lives. I have to get my teeth cleaned every three months because of gum disease. I let it slip for ALMOST A YEAR! On Tuesday I went back to my Periodontist, feeling hugely embarrassed. I had expected them to give me he!!, but everybody there was so happy I had come back! Now I'm totally motivated to get back into a healthy routine.

This is one of my favourite poems by Brecht. Maybe it will help.

EVERYTHING CHANGES
Everything changes. You can make
A fresh start with your final breath.
But what has happened has happened. And the water
You once poured into the wine cannot be
Drained off again.

What has happened has happened. The water
You once poured into the wine cannot be
Drained off again,
But everything changes. You can make
A fresh start with your final breath.

Welcome back! :flowerforyou:

BrenNew

I think I've reached it,rock bottom. I'm beyond sad, and discouraged. I was just looking at a picture of myself and it finally hit me that I've stopped trying. I've gained about 10 pounds over the course of a couple months, thanks to yo-yo dieting. I just want to sit in a corner and cry, I feel like I want to give up. Of course, I know I wont, but this is the lowest I've felt about myself in a long time. I had been doing so well; watching what I was eating, exercising regularly... then something happened, im not sure what, but I guess I let life get in the way of being healthy. I dont really know, but either way, I'm sitting here at midnight panicking, because I want this weight off NOW, and i know that it wont happen that way. Im scared to try again. I had went so far, and now I'm back at square one. I dont want to go out where people can see me, especially the people who know me and will be able to see the weight i've put on. I can't believe I didnt notice it before, what was I thinking??
For anybody who is struggling, take my story as a warning, dont erase all your hard work and end up like me... with no self esteem.
blah :sad:

I remember going to a baby shower a couple of years ago, and hiding in a corner, hoping that most everyone there (especially ONE woman who I couldn't stand and was wearing black leather pants and looking fantastic!) wouldn't be able to see just how much weight I'd gained since we'd last been together. I was even really desperate to use the bathroom, but held off just as long as I could, since I didn't want anyone to see me walking around! Let me tell you, it's an awful, depressing way to live! :sad:
When I came to MFP, my whole life changed! I can't say enough good about the food diary and all the wonderfully supportive members!
If you're as depressed as you say, you're just going to have to get yourself back on track. It DIDN'T go on in a day, and no, it WON'T go off in a day either. Remember, slow and steady wins the race.
Hopefully you'll feel so much better about yourself once you start working with your numbers, through better food choices and moderation (MOST of the time!) and getting in some exercise. I know that once I started doing that, and finally felt in control of my eating, the weight started coming off, and I was no longer depressed! :happy: It'll be the same way for you, if you just give it a chance!

hetipt01

Thanks everyone.
I'm still feeling down this mornin, but reading what ya'll had to say makes me feel better. Its great to know that you've been where I am now, but you are changing your lives, just like what I want to do. Keep up the good work everyone, and I will have good news to report in a few months!
Thanks!