Mind Not Believing the Change in Physical Appearance

charlotte66

yep i feel like this! i remember 2/3 years ago looking in the mirror thinking i was the same as i am now and i was 3 stone lighter then!! looking at old pics i was tiny but im still in the mind set i look the same as i did pre children 5 years ago the out of shape 14 stone teenager

jodyw83

It's called body dysmorphia and it's a real and serious thing. I looked at old pics from high school when I thought I was huge and I was tiny! I hope now that I can appreciate the thin me this time!

Amryfal

i have lost 41 lbs. (4 sizes) and i still can't see it in the mirror. i have another ~50 to go and i'm hoping that someday i'll be able to see it. i know my old clothes are all too big; i've been buying sizes i haven't worn since high school (was still heavy then); i ask my fiancé if he notices, and he says he does. but i can't see it. i wish i'd taken a "before" pic or measurements so i could look at that when i'm feeling low, but i steered well clear of cameras/measuring tapes at my biggest.

you aren't alone. when i need to reassure myself, i check my upper arms and thighs (starting to show a straight line in places rather than a wide curve, lol) and find my recently-revealed hip-bones. i have a corset, and occasionally i put it on to see how much tighter i can lace it - more than i could have imagined (when i have to buy a new one, *that* will be news - heh). i've got a ways to go but i can *feel* small differences much more effectively than i can *see* any changes in the mirror.

sweetbeckymarie

I'm the same way and have been for years, aside from having my "skinny days" I still see the flawed areas that have always been my troubled areas body wise. Which is just ridiculous at my size. But when I put on those jeans that used to fit just a bit snugger and they are comfortable that is enough for me.

1Cor1510

Bump.

reggie2run

Ditto!

But one of my MFP told me once that if I didn't want to go back from where I came weight-wise, I had better start working on my mind as well as my body. It's still a work in progress but slowly and surely, I am beginning to see the new me when I look in the mirror. I'm still not fond of my behind or my tummy, but it's a work in progress and so am I....so I'm working on being proud of where I am, of all I've accomplished cause I don't want to ever go back. We have to work on catching our minds up to our bodies. Not any easy task as, like another poster said, we are our own worst enemies.

gmichaelguy

i wish i'd taken a "before" pic or measurements so i could look at that when i'm feeling low, but i steered well clear of cameras/measuring tapes at my biggest..

Well take that picture now so you won't be in the same place 20 pounds from now! And I bet someone snapped a picture at some point. Maybe you just have to search for it.

mc1927

you look amazing you should be happy with what you've done for yourself

Rockmyskinnyjeans

I have the occasional "skinny" day where I see myself as I probably should, but usually I still see all the flaws. Putting the pics side by side has helped some. Having a husband who rearrirms that I've lost a ton helps, too. Retail therapy in clothes 3-5 sizes smaller definitely helps, but then I fall back to the bad days. I wish there was some magic cure to get past them. *sigh

Amryfal

i wish i'd taken a "before" pic or measurements so i could look at that when i'm feeling low, but i steered well clear of cameras/measuring tapes at my biggest..

Well take that picture now so you won't be in the same place 20 pounds from now! And I bet someone snapped a picture at some point. Maybe you just have to search for it.

i did that just the other day and i'm thinking my mother has to have pics floating around - she is ALL CAMERA ALL THE TIME especially when she's in grandma mode lol

tonyaf78

I still avoid looking in mirror when I am naked because I am scared I will still see the 190 lbs me. A lot of times this summer I have felt like I shouldn't be wearing the shorts and dresses I have been because of thoughts that I look too big. I know I have lost weight and look better- all you wonderful MFP ppl tell me so, but it's still hard to wrap my head around it. I've been on the bigger side for 28 years of my life, this is a huge adjustment.

SPNLuver- you have made an astonishing transformation!! I saw your pix and you have a body that most would love to have!! I saw your pix and thought of a body builder! I would love to have the definition you have!! and actually, I am striving to have the muscle tone you do! GIRL YOU ROCK!

tonyaf78

When I was heavier, I always felt there was a skinny girl screaming to get out...Now that I have lost 60lbs, there are several days when I feel as fat if not fatter than I was 60lbs ago... I still have a lot to lose, but hopefully my mentality will change...

Kalraii

Speaking from the perspective of a friend that has the same issue, the same friend who in the past has had to deal with unhealthy weight loss through bulimia and anorexia due to her body dysmorphic disorder I have found it somewhat heartbreaking for her to think so lowly of her body image because she is so beautiful and she is my real life inspiration for getting in shape. This last year she has been a great success going from 14st down to 11st in a healthy manner and looks great! Thing is she still thinks shes that same "ugly fat child" as she calls herself when referring to her past. It's hard because some people call her "attention seeking" or "fishing for compliments" when it's not the case. Some people are just resentful and know nothing. She gets so wound up about her body image and what she is eating that no matter what anyone else says she still sees something different. The other day she pointed to an overweight girl and said she felt she looked the same in a condescending tone, not to the girl, but to herself. Then I pointed out I was the same build and probably the same weight but she doesn't see me like that at all. It's all so very strange. I am always there for her and it keeps me in perspective when I look at myself. We are always more beautiful than we give ourselves credit for.

All you ladies (and men :P) are an inspiration and should remember that people like ME look up to YOU for motivation Wobbly bits and all we are all human and worth more than our negative shoulder sitting devils make us think

eig6

I have the occasional "skinny" day where I see myself as I probably should, but usually I still see all the flaws. Putting the pics side by side has helped some. Having a husband who rearrirms that I've lost a ton helps, too. Retail therapy in clothes 3-5 sizes smaller definitely helps, but then I fall back to the bad days. I wish there was some magic cure to get past them. *sigh

I completely agree, retail therapy definitely helps, I always feel better when I go shopping and see that I need to wear sizes smaller than I think. I hope one day I wont have this problem anymore too, most of the time I just try not to think about it. Its really hard when my boyfriend tells me he thinks Im beautiful and that I look small all the time and I have to hold back from screaming WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! I feel bad sometimes that I can't just take the compliment :frown: .

mscrumbyy

I've never really been the sort of person who looks in the mirror and only sees my flaws, I've always been able to appreciate what I have and I think I'm fairly lucky in that sense. But although the scales and my measuring tape have been showing the difference, when I look I still don't see it. Someone took a picture of me tonight thought and I was kind of taken aback by the difference. I usually really hate photos :laugh:

budru21

Yep. I still feel like the skinny little boy I used to be. I honestly have to remind myself on a daily basis that I've physically changed.

^^The affirmations above help a lot.

Agree...all about affirmations. I had to "convince" myself that I was actually a size 1 with 9% bodyfat when I was on stage my first time. I still, literally, see a size 12 with 25% bf. It is a mental game!!

jyuubi

I look in the mirror and think I see changes, but then my mind just says it's not true. Of course, nearly 20lbs can make a big difference in anyone, and since I'm of a larger size, it should be easier to see. So I'm not forcing my eyes to see it in the mirror, but letting my clothes show me instead, which are now fitting loser, and I can fit in pants two sizes smaller than what I wear. That's a change that's hard not to see.

vallemic

I know what you mean. I went from a size 12 to a size 4 (lost 40 lbs in 8 months) and even though I KNOW I look a lot different, it's like it just won't sink in! My sister tagged me in a photo on Facebook the other day in which I was wearing a string bikini. Had I seen this 10 months ago, I'm sure I would have LOVED this photo. But when I saw it, I automatically looked at my thighs and thought "got lots of work to do there!".

shorty35565

I'm 5'5. I've went from 185lbs down to 130.4lbs and I still feel fat as all get out I can't see the new me in the mirror. Mayb it's cuz I still am fat. I mean, I'm smaller than b4, but I can't see really being small. Mayb it's my huge belly. I can't even talk so welll ab myself here lol So yeah

blonde71

Sometimes the only way I can actually process the change is by looking back at the progress photos I've taken along the way. Being told by family and friends that I look good is one thing but seeing the actual transformation captured on my digital camera makes it real for me, you know?