One of the most defeting things...

Nicopants1314

Is when every time my mom looks at me, she says I look I'm gaining weight. Or asks me if I'm pregnant.

It doesn't help that she only weighs 110 pounds.

I'm 218...

It's a horrible feeling..

majordlite

I'm sorry she's saying those things to you, truly. It sounds as if she's not a very happy person, to be honest. Hang around here, and we'll keep you motivated instead of defeated. {{hugs}}

dellashanks

That sucks! Use it a fuel and take it to the gym! That always makes me feel better when someone says or does something negative. :happy:

michellesisreed

wowzers speachless that your mom would say that.

katrinkap

And that is why you are on here with all of us...we understand what you are going through!!! Add me girl and we can support each other on our new journey!

Nicopants1314

She isn't happy..

She has herniated 4 discs in her back. Had back surgery and can't walk very well...

So she takes it out on me.

GeorgieLove708

I'm sorry your mom says things like that to you My stepmom is nothing but supportive and I'm so thankful for that. Channel her words into something positive for yourself.

JosieRawr

So sorry that you're having to go through that, but don't let her get you down, ask mentioned already- use it as fuel. Don't let her win, Do this for YOU. good luck in your journey and you can also feel free to add me if u want to.

DanaDark

Is when every time my mom looks at me, she says I look I'm gaining weight. Or asks me if I'm pregnant.

It doesn't help that she only weighs 110 pounds.

I'm 218...

It's a horrible feeling..

One day tell her that you are pregnant... then roll with it for the whole day... oh the fun...

jenilla1

Sorry, but she sounds like a real jerk. I avoid people who bring me down - even if they're family. Would she talk like that to a stranger? A friend? She shouldn't talk that way to you, either. I would cut her off until she learns how to behave.

javagsd

Could the prospect of you losing weight somehow be threatening to her ego in some sort of warped competitive way?

crzyone

Oh, man, if humans could just realize that the words we say can cut so deep and can affect the way we live our lives for years to come.

That is so hard and I"m so sorry that she says that to you. It is good of you to see that she has her own problems and pains and is just taking that out on you and it may not be the real her. She shouldn't. But, she is. Just know that your worth does not come from your weight. Your beauty comes from the heart.

Keep loving her and being here and doing your best but don't let anyone throw your life off course.

Nicopants1314

Could the prospect of you losing weight somehow be threatening to her ego in some sort of warped competitive way?

That's very possible.

Azalael

I completely know how you feel. It's discouraging having to deal with that. But you have everyone here, and it's not about meeting her expectations or pleasing her, it's about being happy with yourself In the long run, it'll all be worth it and in the end she'll take back those words. Stay strong!!!

quickchekgal

This is something I would do. Haha.

Is when every time my mom looks at me, she says I look I'm gaining weight. Or asks me if I'm pregnant.

It doesn't help that she only weighs 110 pounds.

I'm 218...

It's a horrible feeling..

One day tell her that you are pregnant... then roll with it for the whole day... oh the fun...

ephemerata

**** that noise.

tell her she deserves the pain she's in for how cruel she is. (i don't actually believe that anyone deserves physical pain. but still. this made me angry.)

Moniqua1

That's awful! My mom told me.when I was about 7 that I will NEVER be little or tiny, I think she.said this to take pressure off of me to try to be something I ssw in the magazines, but my whole life, I felt defeated. Don't let others determine your worth, you are in charge, take control and prove her wrong. I think moms say things sometimes with good intentions and it comes out very distorted because their words mean more to us than we'd ever let on.

laus_8882

Sounds like you're both pretty unhappy. Instead of lashing out at your mother or lying about a pregnancy, can you ask her to sit down and chat, maybe with an intermediary there to help smooth things along? If you find you're not able to really talk about your feelings, why not write your mother a letter outlining how she makes you feel, the steps you're taking toward a healthier lifestyle, and the emotional support you need from her to help you get there.

BeckyNaturoMommy

What a *****. Sorry, but you're mom should be showing you how to respect your body and helping your with your self-worth, not tearing you down. I'm mad for you.

What if she'd ended up pushing you into an eating disorder?

redfroggie

Pain does really affect your moods. Chronic pain can be very depressing and make you very angry. However that is no excuse for being cruel, especially to your children. Don't take it to heart, easier said than done I know, but keep up the hard work. You want to do this for you, not for her.
Good luck!

Gyllain

Have you explained to her how her comments make you feel?
Perhaps you could calmly ask her if she could be more supportive and try not to be negative towards you?
Some people like to put others down for various reasons, usually low self esteem, being unhappy within themselves, that sort of thing.
She needs to look at what going on within herself, instead of taking it out on you.
Do you live with her, or do you have your own place?

lauren3101

Ok, my Mum used to do the exact same thing to me. And when I lost weight, rather than congratulate and encourage me, she used to say something like 'you still have a long way to go', or 'you still aren't as slim as me'.

I know it's easier said than done, but ignore it. From reading your comments on here you seem aware that she says these things because she has issues with herself.
People don't realize that criticism often doesn't help weight loss - it makes people depressed, critical of themselves and feel useless - and if you are that way inclined, those feelings tend to lead to more eating.

Don't fall into this trap, you have made the first step in joining here. Do it for you, not your Mum.