A bit of a rant.
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Personally, I would confront her directly but gracefully. I'd let her know that I was very proud of my hard work and accomplishments, and if she can't appreciate and support me in that, that she's not being a friend. I'd tell her that if she's not contributing to my survival, she's detracting from it, and that I hope she understands that I only want positive, supportive people in my life, and that if she can't be that for me then she is more than welcome to exit my life.
I'm not recommending that's what you should do, but this would personally be MY first instict.
(edit: actually, I probably say something like "Dude-- not cool" and leave it at that, and only really bring it up if she continued to show suppressive tendencies toward me or if she acted notably fake around me the next time I saw her. Or I'd just delete her and have that be the end of it. )0 -
She is just jealous of you. You look amazing.
I personally would say something, but that is just because I hate people thinking they can get away with talking about me.0 -
It's common for people who are insecure with themselves or have low self esteem to "lash" out at others. Makes them feel better I suppose.
It's easy to say ignore her but I'm sure it still hurt to hear. Whether or not you decide to say something about it will ultimately be up to you but the bottom line is that YOUR opinion and how you feel about yourself is the only one that should matter to you at the end of the day. Use her words to help motivate you to reach your goal and maintain it.
BTW...I think you're beautiful. She must be blind. And kudos to your friend for sticking up for you!!
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My two cents ...
I wouldn't let it trouble you but I certainly wouldn't let her get away with it either.
I would totally call her on it. Start by telling her that you overheard her negative comments and you're not appreciative of it.
Keep it short and sweet. It may be hard to get the courage up to face her but I guarantee if you call her on her actions, she may think twice about flapping her gums the next time and she'll know you're strong enough to stand up to her and may even have a new found respect for you because of it!
Stay motivated and determined and keep posting your pictures. Let her see that she's not stopping you and ultimately, you'll have the last laugh!
Oh and WOOHOO to you !! Congratulations on your success thus far :flowerforyou:0 -
As everyone else said: PURE JEALOUSY!!!! You look amazing and she only wishes she could look half as good! Great job on your loss thus far~ don't let ANYONE knock you down!!!! :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:0
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I would hand her my piece of cake and say something like "I love my body too much to eat this, but obviously don't care, so here, have mine." :drinker: :laugh:0
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you look amazing and a massive WELL DONE on your weight loss!0
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Seriously, she is just angry that she can't get up the motivation to lose weight. Be proud of yourself and don't mind what people like her say. Some bigger people are just unhappy with themselves- they expel that hate, its what they do. You go girl! Keep up the good work!0
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I actually agree with the woman who said to be honest. That it's fine to say, "I don't feel like talking to you, I overheard what you said the other day and was pretty shocked by the spite and jealousy you seem to have towards me. I'm sure things will improve with time but that's why I'm don't want to talk to you." Or just avoid her totally.0
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Sounds like an NSV to me0
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Hey don't worry about her. You are doing Fan-tas-tic. She needs to learn to be happy for other people. I'm proud of you, you are proud of you. Who is she that you would let her opinion bother you, or have any power over your life. She isn't worthy of that sort of power. I say just forget it. Some people are just idiots.I recently put my profile picture of my weight loss on Facebook. I am very proud of how far I have come along and got nothing but encouraging words from all of my friends. My best friend's sister in law saw me a couple of days ago (she is pretty big herself). She told me how skinny I was and that she hated me (kidding of course, or so I thought she was) and that she thought that the picture I put up on Facebook was photoshopped. I told her "My God if I could photoshop" and left. I went back to my friend's house, she was still there. Before I knocked I heard her sister in law say that I hadn't even lost that much weight, that I wasn't even that pretty, that my before picture was so embarassing and that it was awfully tacky that I put a before and after picture up when I wasn't even done loosing weight. My friend told her "well she has lost 45 pounds and I think she looks good":smokin: I left. Of course it made me mad but I am a lady and will not stoop down for anyone. I am not one to care what people think (much) but what is her problem? Why do SOME women have to be so catty with each other? This is my life right? Let me be. It's my friend's birthday monday and I know she will be there. She is a hypocrite and will act like we are the bestest friends in the world. :noway: Do I tell her something? Just leave it alone? What would you do?0 -
J E A L O U S............. to the core!!!!!!! peeps that are Jealous and insecure .. get off on talking down about other peeps... you lost nearly 50 POUNDS thats a LOT... and of course you look way diff.. photo-shopped what an idiot?!!?!? lol...
i vote you say nothing at all.. and show up looking cute and be happy.. dont even give her the satisfaction that it hurt or shocked or anything to you... you know that old saying.. "kill em with kindness"?? i'd se this here.. cuz really theres NOTHING to defend..
your 45lbs less and thats a fact!!
and she is def a hater.. and insecure one at that...
you rock!!:drinker:
^^^^ THIS ^^^^0 -
Your friend's SIL is jealous of you. Your friend stuck up for you. Let your friend know that you heard her sticking up for you, and you appreciate it. Leave it at that. Be kind to your friend's SIL. Your friend will appreciate not having to get between the drama, especially on her special day.
You are doing awesomely! Your success may one day inspire her to try herself rather than seethe with jealousy. Until then, you only win by not letting her negativity rub off on you. (Seriously. Nothing is more annoying to a ***** than being ignored!
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This. I am glad that your friend really was a friend and defended you to her SIL. Don't waste your time getting into anything with the SIL, you are doing great- 45 lbs is a very big accomplishment.0 -
First I want to say 43lbs is a lot of weight. Congratulations and you look fabulous!!! Secondly I am glad you have tough skin, but that right there was nothing shy of pure jealously. She's mad that you're looking hot. And since I am one to let others know how I feel. I would simply tell her that you heard what she said about you. And that you have no place in your life to associate with people with such ignorance and to please not speak to you. This way regardless when you have to see that jealous witch she'll know better then to speak with you. And if you ever hear her have the nerve to speak about you again, walk in with your head held high and say "I forgive you for talking behind my back, if I were as catty and insecure as you, I would be jealous too".0
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Jealously. People only point out in others what they don't like in themselves. I would just leave and if it becomes too much to bare, then I would definitely confront her.0
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She's jealous of your progress. 45 lbs off is an amazing loss even if you are not at your goal yet. Show yourself off and enjoy the compliments. You deserve it!0
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She's insanely jealous.....:devil:
So, just stay the course, and as you continue to make progress, make sure to gloat over this sub-human.
And at some point when she asks for your advice, steer her toward the most insane crash diet on the market.
Research whatever the biggest scam is.
Tell her that's how you did it.
And good luck with your continued success:drinker:
I just love Bobby :smooched:
He's right0 -
first off u look freaking awesome...secondly i would go to the party in my nicest outfit that shows off my new figure... i wouldnt say anything to her but just let her see how u have lost and how ppl will definetly be complimenting u if shes unsatisfied herself she should just take u as a role model and someone who canhelp her not hate on u ..trust me i have a couple ppl like that in my life and it sucks but i just stay quiet0
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leave it.. support your friend who loves you!0
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Are you sure we are not the same person!???! You look great! Do not get discouraged hun.
I get that too.
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jealousy... it does a lot to a person.
She is taking it out on you because you have done what she wants to do but isn't brave enough.
ETA: You look fabulous by the way.
THIS0 -
Damn, that was super *****y :noway: If I were in your shoes, I would try to just let it roll off my back, but I don't know that I would be successful, lol You look AWESOME, she has balls to say you must have photoshopped your picture - WOW:noway: 0
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Just try to be the bigger person and let it go. Shes probably jealous of your success and not dealing with it in a good way.0
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Don't worry about her, you win at life because you're changing what you weren't happy with and she hasn't got there yet. I have a very low tolerance for hypocrisy so if it were me I wouldn't be able to sit around while someone lied to my face and pretended to be nice to me. I'm quite content to call people out on it but if you can stomach it then do whatever you feel is right. In other news: You look FANTASTIC!0
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Hey OP
I used to know someone like that. He used to try to discourage me when I originally began to talk about enrolling at the university, and would be very passive agressive in his remarks. He wouldn't outright insult me, but he would carry on about how people with an education "think they're better than everyone else" and so on.
You can imagine how bad he became once I enrolled and actuall stuck with it. Obviously I no longer associate with him, and this was between two guys!
My point is that there are people in this world who are so insecure and so fragile inside that they can't stand - absolutely can not stand - to see anyone improve and get better than them. They don't have the internal strength that's needed to improve theirself because that requires being honest with theirself. They lash out at people instead and try to keep them down at their level.
I looked at your avatar photo and your improvement is absolutely obvious! Seriously.
Unfortunately it looks like you can't entirely break off contact with her since she's in your circule of related people and such. The best that you can do is simply not invite her to events or activities, and / or do your best to minimize drama. The good news is that with her going around talking to people like that, they are going to know what kind of person she is.
I'm sure that others here have stories about people making remarks that bring them down about their improvements. Improving your life, be it in fitness or otherwise, will show you who your real friends are and who the parasites are.0 -
She is just jealous ... let it be. Don't take the bait and keep on keeping on!0
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Do something nice for her.
Like, give her all of your "fat" clothing and explain to her that they are simply too big for you now but, they might fit her.0 -
First, you look like you have lost way more 45 lbs, so she obviously has no clue what she's talking about. You look great, dont let a few words from some jealous little girl get you down. Haters are motivators!0
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Tell her to kiss your grits...seriously! What the heck is wrong with people. She is obviously jealous that you have lost the weight and that people are commenting on it. She's upset that she isn't in the spotlight. Just ignore her. Let her fester in her own jealousy.0
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what goes around comes around.0
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