couples dieting -- what a joy!

greytweed22

I am 5'1 and was 114 when I started this diet 2 weeks ago. My boyfriend is 5'6 and 194 lbs (note, he is stalky and very "solid"/muscularly built, and not as overweight as his stats might make him appear on paper).

We are eating 1200 - 1300 calories per day, and my diary is open in case anyone is wondering what we are eating. I try to be very accurate in my portions and reporting, and pre-plan our weeks menu on Sundays. (BTW, yes, I know he should be eating more than 1300 calories, but he is S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N and thinks that is b/s!)

I have lost 4 lbs in 2 weeks and he has stayed the EXACT SAME WEIGHT. He really wants to lose weight and his desire is the main reason we've gone on this diet.

He works construction/concrete in the triple digit heat we've been having, while I have a desk job and get little excersize in during the day. I am baffled as to why he hasn't dropped a pound while I have dropped 4! We are eating essentially the same thing, and he must burn WAY more calories during the day than I. I thought men were supposed to lose weight alot easier than women?

He's getting impatient with not seeing results....might it just take some more time for his body to adjust? Another note is he's never been good at eating properly- before we started on this scheduled meal plan, he would eat very very little during the day and then a big dinner and beers after work...so i'm worried his metabolism might be all screwed up.

He's 30 and I am 26.

Any thoughts?

Wonderob

He is eating too little I reckon

KuroNyankoSensei

Once he starts eating more, he'll probably see the pounds drop off ;3.

Vonwarr

He's eating way too little, especially if he has such an active job. I have a sedentary job and my maintenance calories are 2500 (I've lost 14 lbs eating 2000 a day). He should figure out his BMR - the amount of energy his body needs to stay alive on a daily basis - and maybe that will show him how much he's under-eating by.

Also, randomly FYI - working in the heat makes you retain water more as well, which can appear to "stall" your progress... but that's not really super relevant to this.

Here's a great tool to calculate BMR with: http://www.fat2fitradio.com/tools/bmr/

DopeItUp

1200 is stupid low for an almost 200lb male. Especially if he is "stalky" (sic) as you say with a lot of muscle mass. I'd say bare minimum 1500-1800. A lot higher if he's doing manual labor all day. Put in his stats on MFP and see what he should actually be eating when you calculate that sort of active job. I'm guessing it will give him well over 2000 a day.

Other than that, it's only been 2 weeks. Patience is #1 with the weight loss game. It's #2 and #3 too. You get the idea.

greytweed22

I agree with you all in that he should be eating more. Trust me.

But, regardless of the fact that 1300 calories is unhealthy for him, he should most certainly be losing weight!! Seems pretty odd to me. There's also no way I am going to convince him to eat MORE while he isn't losing anything while eating this little. In reality, that doesn't make any sense.

please nobody mention starvation mode either....I know enough about that topic already.

Vonwarr

please nobody mention starvation mode either....I know enough about that topic already.

Apparently not, as that's what he's going to drive himself into. You should google Undereating and not losing weight. You'd be amazed at the amount of info regarding it and what he's doing. Hope this helps! You truly can lose weight on a higher diet, especially if you're active.

JessyJ03

I am 5'1 and was 114 when I started this diet 2 weeks ago. My boyfriend is 5'6 and 194 lbs (note, he is stalky and very "solid"/muscularly built, and not as overweight as his stats might make him appear on paper).

We are eating 1200 - 1300 calories per day, and my diary is open in case anyone is wondering what we are eating. I try to be very accurate in my portions and reporting, and pre-plan our weeks menu on Sundays. (BTW, yes, I know he should be eating more than 1300 calories, but he is S-T-U-B-B-O-R-N and thinks that is b/s!)

I have lost 4 lbs in 2 weeks and he has stayed the EXACT SAME WEIGHT. He really wants to lose weight and his desire is the main reason we've gone on this diet.

He works construction/concrete in the triple digit heat we've been having, while I have a desk job and get little excersize in during the day. I am baffled as to why he hasn't dropped a pound while I have dropped 4! We are eating essentially the same thing, and he must burn WAY more calories during the day than I. I thought men were supposed to lose weight alot easier than women?

He's getting impatient with not seeing results....might it just take some more time for his body to adjust? Another note is he's never been good at eating properly- before we started on this scheduled meal plan, he would eat very very little during the day and then a big dinner and beers after work...so i'm worried his metabolism might be all screwed up.

He's 30 and I am 26.

Any thoughts?

I'm not sure you should be trying to lose weight at 116 and 2 lbs per week at that size is NOT healthy. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Agator82

I can say from personal experience that when I dropped my calories too low I stalled my weight loss, and that was with cardio 3 times per week. The only thing I can suggest is get him to only moderately increase his calories (perhaps 1300-1500) and see if he starts to lose.

The truth is it I hard to lose weight if you malnourished. My guess is that part of his problem is a nutrient deficiency that just needs to be fixed by getting some regular food into his diet. Good luck to the two of you.

Ziggyzambo

There are really only two options:

1 - He is losing fat, but is retaining a lot of water for some reason. This seems unlikely as most people drop a lot of water weight immediately upon starting a diet.

2 - He is eating a lot more than you think. Forget starvation mode, the reason a man his size cannot lose on 1200 calories a day (especially considering a very active job) is that it is basically impossible to stick to. If he is as stubborn as you say he is, he may be frustrated by his inability to eat so little, which could result in his hiding extra eating from you.

im_2gd2btru

He is eating too little I reckon

I agree he is eating to few calories

greytweed22

There are really only two options:

1 - He is losing fat, but is retaining a lot of water for some reason. This seems unlikely as most people drop a lot of water weight immediately upon starting a diet.

2 - He is eating a lot more than you think. Forget starvation mode, the reason a man his size cannot lose on 1200 calories a day (especially considering a very active job) is that it is basically impossible to stick to. If he is as stubborn as you say he is, he may be frustrated by his inability to eat so little, which could result in his hiding extra eating from you.

Yeah, i'm pretty sure he IS eating more on most days...like he'll have an extra couple snacks after work/before dinner i've noticed, or he'll slip in a beer...but we have a list of the calorie totals of pretty much everything we have in the house, and he writes down everything he eats on the white board on our fridge...its still never really more than 1400. That is still WELL below his needs and therfor he should most certainly be losing!!

916lude

Tell him to quit being stubborn and no it's not BS. I'm 160lb and my cal limit is in the 1800's for 1/2lb loss weekly. I work a desk job and would feel like crap eating that little. Seems like he needs to eat more with that active job