A Touchy Subject

jjscholar

In many ways I am glad that I have lost the weight that I have... At times, it had been a real struggle for me to lose as much weight as I have...

But, sometimes I cannot believe that I had been able to have done what I have done...

There are also times that I feel that I should lose another 60 to 70 lbs. I know it is wrong because this morning I weighed in at 182.4 lbs. I just have the stupid feeling that if I could weigh no more than 115 lbs I would be well liked... I am also so afraid that I will gain all of my lost weight back... I love being thin so much. I do not want to go back and look like that conservative political talk show host who shall remain nameless ever again...

I am not trying to glamorize extreme thinness... It is as dangerous if not more dangerous than being obese...

What I am trying to say is that just because you lose the excess weight, you do not automatically become a more secure person... I am still just as insecure about myself as always... I still hate my body. I still feel very ugly... I still feel like I am totally alone and in the dark so to speak. The difference is that as of this morning, I no longer have the 209.6 extra pounds on my body to justify my insecurities...

At that end of the day, we all have to find someway to be able to accept ourselves... I am not saying that I am giving up on my new way of living... I want to work out... I want to be able to participate in the national dance day Zumba fitness event in my local area Saturday July 28, 2012. I want to avoid junk food... I want to stay thin...

It is just we all need to be sure that we are losing weight for the right reasons and not to just simply be fashionable.

Dauntlessness

I hope you don't take offense to this but I think you need to go talk to someone about how you feel about yourself. It sounds like it could be a slippery slope...

On a side note: All these girls showing their breasts, cleavages, thongs, butt and being overly flirty with even married men shows me that they are just as insecure as they were when they were bigger. Even when they like* their bodies the inside mentality sometimes doesn't change. Its really sad to me.
I think a lot of people hide behind the weight and use it as an excuse to not develop the personality or confidence they want. Instead, they place too much on appearance or the acceptance of others. Its easier to bat their eyes than hold an intelligent conversation. haha. They let insecurities hold them back from the goals they want to achieve and once they don't have "being overweight" to fall back on, they find themselves challenged and become afraid of failure.
Just saying

pkw58

Hey JJscholar -

Thanks for posting what many of us go thru… and deal with after our weight loss. I am going thru being 4 lbs below my goal weight and wanting to be six pounds lighter for new good reason other than a number on a scale. I wanted to be a size 10,but am a size 8.

So I think my biggest fear is not continuing to feel better, and I have equated that better feeling with just what the number on the scale says. But the scale didn't make me feel better, eating healthy and getting more activity got me feeling better and in a smaller size.

So this past week I set my goal to maintaining and making sure I hit my Nike Fuel Band goals EVERY day. I will continue to weigh daily and record on MFP all my calories and exercise daily.

Don't know if this helps, but many of have those "crazy if I just keep losing weight I will be great" thoughts… or at least I did….

Ayla70

I'm going to send you a personal message if that's ok?

In many ways I am glad that I have lost the weight that I have... At times, it had been a real struggle for me to lose as much weight as I have...

But, sometimes I cannot believe that I had been able to have done what I have done...

There are also times that I feel that I should lose another 60 to 70 lbs. I know it is wrong because this morning I weighed in at 182.4 lbs. I just have the stupid feeling that if I could weigh no more than 115 lbs I would be well liked... I am also so afraid that I will gain all of my lost weight back... I love being thin so much. I do not want to go back and look like that conservative political talk show host who shall remain nameless ever again...

I am not trying to glamorize extreme thinness... It is as dangerous if not more dangerous than being obese...

What I am trying to say is that just because you lose the excess weight, you do not automatically become a more secure person... I am still just as insecure about myself as always... I still hate my body. I still feel very ugly... I still feel like I am totally alone and in the dark so to speak. The difference is that as of this morning, I no longer have the 209.6 extra pounds on my body to justify my insecurities...

At that end of the day, we all have to find someway to be able to accept ourselves... I am not saying that I am giving up on my new way of living... I want to work out... I want to be able to participate in the national dance day Zumba fitness event in my local area Saturday July 28, 2012. I want to avoid junk food... I want to stay thin...

It is just we all need to be sure that we are losing weight for the right reasons and not to just simply be fashionable.

xLexa

I hope you don't take offense to this but I think you need to go talk to someone about how you feel about yourself. It sounds like it could be a slippery slope...

On a side note: All these girls showing their breasts, cleavages, thongs, butt and being overly flirty with even married men shows me that they are just as insecure as they were when they were bigger. Even when they like* their bodies the inside mentality sometimes doesn't change. Its really sad to me.
I think a lot of people hide behind the weight and use it as an excuse to not develop the personality or confidence they want. Instead, they place too much on appearance or the acceptance of others. Its easier to bat their eyes than hold an intelligent conversation. haha. They let insecurities hold them back from the goals they want to achieve and once they don't have "being overweight" to fall back on, they find themselves challenged and become afraid of failure.
Just saying

This ^^ and I do understand you, having been a very fit individual up until around the age of 30 it is true that it does not make you happy or feel more accepted if you do not love yourself inside. Trying not to compare yourself to anyone else is a good place to start and look at YOUR journey. You have been so successful, and keep in mind that you are in control. You did it man!! Just don't lose focus and fall back into old habits, for many of us, I think eating or overeating can be put alongside an addiction(maybe a strong word idk cant think of better right now), we get to our goal and think we can eat what we want now. Eating what we wanted was what got us here in the first place so this is a long term, lifelong journey not a quick fix. If you keep those things focused in your mind I truly think the chances of putting it all back on again will be less.

I wish you all luck and think you are great for getting so far on your journey, love yourself for who you are and what you have done because there are many who cannot do what you have! You are a success! Best wishes!!

lalalee13

I think what you've accomplished is amazing and shows amazing determination. I understand the idea that it is easier to focus
on the weight than on other things that cause us problems. I encourage you to add more friends on MFP for a support system. I also have benefited from Christian counseling to deal with the underlying issues that caused me to overeat in the first place. God created you uniquely as He desired and He delights in you. He has great plans for you. He will not forget about you. Blessings to you.