Called fat by a stranger.

chocl8girl

Yep, I've been yelled at from cars and houses (once was wearing a red shirt and someone shouted out their window at me "Hey, Kool Aid!"). I didn't wear red for about 10 years after that. I used to be followed down the street by my neighbor's kids while they shouted all manner of insults at me and my children (my youngest was an infant at that time, and they constantly called him "Ugly Baby"). I never knew how to handle it, so I never said anything. It still hurts, but if it happened to me now, there are a few choice things I would say to the person, child or not. People are rude, but they will not be rude to ME and get away with it. And my kids better be prepared for Armageddon if I ever catch them saying anything mean like that to anyone...lol

You just keep being awesome and let those people be miserable all by themselves.

ellie319

Yep, I've been yelled at from cars and houses (once was wearing a red shirt and someone shouted out their window at me "Hey, Kool Aid!"). I didn't wear red for about 10 years after that. I used to be followed down the street by my neighbor's kids while they shouted all manner of insults at me and my children (my youngest was an infant at that time, and they constantly called him "Ugly Baby"). I never knew how to handle it, so I never said anything. It still hurts, but if it happened to me now, there are a few choice things I would say to the person, child or not. People are rude, but they will not be rude to ME and get away with it. And my kids better be prepared for Armageddon if I ever catch them saying anything mean like that to anyone...lol

You just keep being awesome and let those people be miserable all by themselves.

WTF....dude Im sorry! If anybody ever called my baby ugly Id get physical with them.No one should tolerate them,my heart hurts for you.

thelpv

I know that this post has been quiet for a while but I just wanted to say that, at least for me, much good has come out of your unfortunate experience.

This post has uplifted me in knowing that Im not alone in my struggles to lose weight and not alone in experiencing hurt by the cutting words of others. Sometimes after you're insulted so openly by strangers, you can feel really alone. Reading through others responses has been extremely comforting to me especially when you have a fresh wound and you're feeling kinda low.

A little background, I have a min pin who is larger than the breed standard and I recently adopted a pug who is not only bigger than breed standard, he's just plain huge for a pug.
I havent had any problems with walking them except the occasional person stopping me asking me what the pug is mixed with because he's huge. Its just normal curiosity.

A few weeks ago, I was walking along and a guy shouts from his car "oh look, its a fat girl walking her fat dogs HAHAHAHA" I shrugged it off but it still kinda stayed with me and manifested itself into extra self consciousness, every time I walked them.

I have since moved to a different city and am trying to find my regular walking/jogging routine again. Yesterday, I was out walking and came to be in front of a house where the occupants were just happening to have a bbq. It was a large latino affair and there were people everywhere. A couple on the porch were just watching me as i passed by the house.
I dont speak spanish so i didnt understand everything they were saying to each other but I clearly heard the words "pinche puerca" being uttered at me. They then followed that up with a laugh and started making out and kept staring at me.
I just looked at them puzzled and then kept along.
It was killing me to figure out what they said so I looked it up when I got back to my place. "fat ****ing pig" is the general consensus. Not only that, but also "sloppy" and "slut" and "someone whose fat rolls are disgustingly apparent" are thrown into some meanings too (urban dictionary can be a double edged sword when finding out slang meanings) I was embarrassed and devastated.
I kept hoping that maybe they were just making fun of my big pug but its pretty unlikely.

One last incident: I was online playing poker on one of those facebook casino apps. They arrange it so your profile picture is visible to the people you're playing with.Also, they have a chat box so you can talk to other players. Im not sure what set this one guy off but out of nowhere, he writes in the chat box (which is visible to the entire room) "Hey LPV, why dont you keep your fat, ****ing *kitten* back on the reservation?" ...Im not even native american. Idiot.

But Im not gonna stop doing what I do. Im not gonna let those *kitten* get the best of me. Im still gonna go on walks. Im still gonna go about my business. Im done feeling bad about my fat. I will eventually get to my weight goal. It doesnt help when people say discouraging **** to you but I believe in karma and even without karma I just need to focus on ME, not the rude *kitten* hats of society.
I dont look it, but I come from an asian/pacific islander background and I get that some cultures are just more blunt than others but comments against fat people is still rude and unacceptable. Unfortunately the social mores against fat have existed forever and aren't gonna change because I dont like it.

BUT! I am relieved to hear stories where fat people are attacked (karen the bus monitor, the news reporter who fired back against a rude viewer) and there is a positive public outcry. It shows that not all people are terrible, foul-mouthed monsters. Just because someone says it, does NOT mean that everyone agrees. Humans can be cruel but the positive ones help make up for it.

Shellsmiley

This happened to me three weeks ago: So, I was working out at the gym [keep in mind in the past 72 hours I've received only 7 hours of sleep total] and I was on the treadmill running and some jerk said "Don't fall fatty, you don't want to pay for the machine!" First thought was to get off that treadmill and stomp his *kitten*. Then I looked over and he was BIGGER than me! I just responded "Hope you have a great workout too, looks like you could use it." and finished up and then sat in the massage chair for a while. Then as I was leaving he ACTUALLY tried to ask me on a date - what the hell is wrong with people - my answer was straight up "Oh hell no, comments like those earlier and your lucky I didn't pop you one" and walked away. My trainer Joe laughed when I said that! HA. Jerkwad. I could have been SOOO much more evil as I have zero patience right now - no sleep = b*tch!! :explode: :devil:

Shellsmiley

I may raise some eyebrows, but here is my philosophy:

FAT is not a curse word. All it does is identify a person.
Calling someone tall, short, skinny, black, brown etc.. is just a way to identify someone if you don't know them.
But society has made the word FAT too complicated.
People should not take offense to such things.

That is just what I think.
I apologize in advance if my philosophy made you mad.

I agree with you, it's just the CONTEXT it's used in that really gets my goat! If someone just yells at me and calls me fat, I actually laugh (to one guys surprise, laughed him out of the store cause it was hilarious the way he said it) but other times, I just wanna pound that person into the cement and walk all over them!

pinkraynedropjacki

Hang on.


While I don't agree the kids should have said that to you... if you are overweight then it was the truth... be it rude anyway.

BUT


Then you have said you would have slapped him....... wait a min....... violence over a word you could have ignored & kept going.... like any normal person would have done? Violence is NEVER acceptable.... N E V E R


Words are just that...words..... violence is physical & CAN hurt.

yogeshsarkar

I never even got called fat in middle/high school (in ear shot at least)

Lucky you! Don't remember how many kids I had beaten up in school for calling me fat! Of course people on the streets do point sometime and even laugh, but most of them are ugly anyways, inside and outside.

brevislux

It's a good thing you stood up to him.

lmbs1966

Yes, this is correct, but sometimes the F bomb just seems to be the only appropriate response to young punks. If they can dish it out, they can take it.
Ignoring these kids is the best idea and remember they are kids, cursing back at them only affirms to them that cursing is okay. You're the adult, showing a better example is important, even if you're furious.

wychwych

I am sorry this has happened to you and I am equally sad that it has hurt you so much. Please don't let this experience colour your opinion of young people. I didn't want children either when I was younger but I am now the mother of a beautiful sixteen year old daughter who would never of dreamt of saying this to you or anyone ( and would probably have given your friends in the park a lecture on good manners if she had heard them.)

I notice on your profile that you have stated that " no doctor would want a fat tech assisting him". Fat or thin it is who you are as a person that matters. My sister who is also large has had no problems pursing this career and is so good she has been head hunted several times in her career. I myself have just landed a job as a newly qualified registered nurse in an area that attracts considerable applicants( and I am considerably larger than you.) It's all about self belief.

You may get comments from other people in the future, either because they are being nasty or because they don't realise what they are saying could cause offence( my favourite was a child with ASD at my daughters primary school turning round and telling me I was fat........that was one mortified teacher but I said to her he's right I am) Don't let them get you down. Keep your head held high and concentrate on who you are and where you want to be. Hugs

TheLittleLebowski

That sucks, like a lot people who have posted here have said most children are raised well and are awesome, don't let one loser ruin your mojo.

My friends would always mock me for the being the fat one but it was fairly gentle stuff, one of the few times it hurt was quite a few years back when I was still in school in the canteen and a group of girls were in the queue in front of me and let me go first because they were still deciding. One of them turned to the others and said 'shouldn't have done that there'll be nothing left'.

Sorta sucked, then a few months ago I ran into one of them over the summer and she was complimenting me on my weight loss, I really wanted to scream abuse at her but I realised that you have to let some stuff go or else spend the rest of your life feeling bitter.

lisforlaurenn

So sorry to hear that happened to you. I can completely sympathize with that situation. I was leaving the grocery store a few weeks ago and some guy yelled out fata** to me like three times across a row of cars. I also recently encountered a situation at the gym when I was working with my trainer where some teenage boys kept making comments like "Someone's getting big in here" and other phrases with big in them indirectly meant for me.

whitneyps7

i got called fat at the grocery store once. i was buying little debbies and cookies and stuff cause i was going to see my godson whos 4 so i was getting the stuff for him and the guy behind me was like "shouldnt u put some of that stuff back u shouldnt be eating that kinda crap".....wow i just ignored it

- another time i went on a blind date and afterwards i txt him and said "not ur type huh?" and he was like hell no i dosnt even look like the picture my friend showed me, whos that in the pics? and u must have taken theos a long time ago, and blah blah blah just went off about how i wasted his time and money and blah blah blah....wow dude not to mention while we were eating he was checking like every single girl out as they walked by. i vow to never do a blingd date again.

Hbazzell

There were two Hannahs at my school. I was fat Hannah and the other was skinny Hannah. At the time I was 5'8" and about 140 lbs, so not fat at all really. I have gained 30 lbs since then. I wonder what they would say about me now.

likearadiowave

I tend to "consider the source" ... if the person calling you names is stupid enough to display their ignorance so openly, then what they say should automatically have little value. Don't value what idiots say -- that will only make their words more important, when they aren't.

ArtGeek22

I completely understand! Kids are jerks :explode:. We just cant let it get to us because we are going to succeed while they will fall flat on their face. Stay strong girl, and congrats on the progress!!!! :flowerforyou:

lyndyb88

I always hear that we should try to let comments like that just slide off of us and not let them get to us, but they always have a way of sticking with us. two examples i can think of are comments i can't forget. One - I was at the park in town trying to run on the mile track. Two guys drove by real slow in a pickup and shouted run fatty run (in a forrest gump voice)...means nothing to me but can't seem to forget it. The other was a couple years ago on the fourth of july when it was unseasonably cold (about 60 degrees). I was in the parking lot of my apartment complex to watch the flyover that starts the parade. I had wet hair and was shivering. A neighbor was there and she was also shivering. One of the elderly men from downstairs said well I understand why she (my neighbor) is cold...she's at least skinny. Again...no idea why it has stuck with me so much. I vow to never make ****ty statements like that once I'm the skinny chick

IWantToo

This reminds me of a few months back when my friend and I were in a clothing store and a group of little girls went up to her and called her fat as they were standing in a gaggle laughing, my friend said "What did you say?" And they laughed in her face and said "You're really Fat" These girls ranged in age from maybe 5-8, old enough to know better. My friend said "No thats not very nice you dont say things like that" and they looked mortified only because they're mother was watching in horror... as we were leaving the little girls came up in a gaggle and were like youre really pretty youre beautiful as their "mother" watched on in a coaching manner obviously she had told them to come up to her, to try and make amends as if that made any sense obviously they didnt think she was beautiful.

I personally have been fat since birth... so i've seen and heard it all.. someone calling another person fat doesnt shock me as much as them not having a filter and thinking its alright, i would never have called a person a name at 12 years old, people with no sensors make me sad.

MrsChristaHughes

I think that all of us has heard those words and it's true that they are so hurtful! Until a person knows what we go through being an overweight person they will not truly understand the struggles we endure each and every day. Even bending over to tie your shoes or walking up a flight of stairs is exhausting. We are all here for the same reasons, to lose weight and be healthy. We live with constant stares and ridicule because the media says we should be one size and we don't fit that image. Truth is...everyone is different, we all come in different shapes and sizes, but we have to love ourselves before we can make the change. If people make us feel like crap about ourselves we are less likely to succeed in the goals we have set for ourselves. If we brush it off however and realize these persons are ignorant to the daily struggles we face then we all succeed! Don't let the negativity of others make you become something you are not, show them that with hard work and determination that you are doing something to change it. Who cares if they don't like how we look, it's how we see ourselves that matters. At least we are making the effort to change and become the persons we want to be!

jebo1982

I have had a guy tell me that he would date me if i was 50 pounds lighter (he was smoking outside the gym i was walking into). I told him that even if he was taller i still wouldnt date him. Im sure ive been called fat by strangers but it affect me enough to remember (i only remember that one because i came up with a catchy response).

i have been called fat by family members (specifically my sister who lost 100 pounds from gastric bypass). She also made comments about my cellulite and back fat. i am still kind of confused by her considering 6 months ago she was 25 pounds heavier than me (and 6 inches shorter!) . It sucks but dont let it get you down.