Losing weight secretly?

healthychanges1

Hey everyone I'm currently 155 pounds at 5'7 and I'm 20 pounds away from my goal weight. However, I need to hide the fact that I'm dieting from my family. Today my mom straight out accused me of dieting, which I denied. I used to have an eating disorder which is why she is concerned, but I'm losing weight the healthy way this time. How can I make it less obvious that I am trying to lose weight, and what should I say if she makes another comment?

BlurtLouder

Has it occurred to you that attempting to hide weight loss is an ED red flag? If you're lying to your mother, you may not be doing this the "healthy way". Talk it out with your family.

caraiselite

yeaaah if you have to lie, then i think you should talk to a therapist (which i would guess you are) and not us.

RobynMWilson

My general rule of thumb is that if I have to lie about something, I probably shouldn't be doing it. If you're doing it the healthy way, sit down w your family, show them your food diary and show them you are doing it the right way this time. Just like I tell addicts and alcoholics...you broke a trust that's gonna take quite some time to rebuild. Take it from a recovered alky with many years in recovery under my belt lol

EDesq

Has it occurred to you that attempting to hide weight loss is an ED red flag? If you're lying to your mother, you may not be doing this the "healthy way". Talk it out with your family.

THIS^^^

masked_habit

I am having to do the same thing! My ma's bf is the one that always accuses me of being too thin though. I'm 25 lbs from my goal weight. It's just that I'm actually trying to lose weight the healthy way but my family won't listen to that...all they hear is me trying to lose weight which must mean I'm starving myself. I just make food openly in front of them a lot and ask them to go get the items that I need from the grocery store so they know that I am eating. I don't tell them how much I exercise but I'm also by myself a lot and I'll be going back to school soon.

kiminikimkim

Tell your family you are on a lifestyle change and they can track your progress anytime online.

The hardest part is actually telling them. Being transparent will lead them to trusting you.

xsmilexforxmex

My general rule of thumb is that if I have to lie about something, I probably shouldn't be doing it. If you're doing it the healthy way, sit down w your family, show them your food diary and show them you are doing it the right way this time. Just like I tell addicts and alcoholics...you broke a trust that's gonna take quite some time to rebuild. Take it from a recovered alky with many years in recovery under my belt lol

This. Hiding the fact that you're dieting healthy is not any better than if you weren't dieting healthy. Many times it can be a learned behavior from before and you justify it by 'they'll make me stop.' If you're being healthy there is no reason to hide it and they won't make you stop AND if anything telling people is probably better to err on the side of caution because you did have an eating disorder... A lot of times our image of ourselves is skewed and we don't realize if we are hurting ourselves, being open and honest is the only way to earn that trust and keep the security that you won't relapse.

BeantownSooner

Both of you with the same issue should be honest and my suggestion would be to get yourselves on a weight training program vs. a "diet" with an exercise program that's cario based (i'm just guessing at that). If you build more lean muscle you will burn more calorie, you will need to eat more and you'll tone up. When you tone up you will gain muscle but lose fat. You may not lose right away doing this but you will shrink and look very fit vs. thinner. Let's say you did this and stayed the same weight but went down 2 sizes how would you feel about yourself? Likely pretty good.

sneakypackrat

Tell your family you are on a lifestyle change and they can track your progress anytime online.

The hardest part is actually telling them. Being transparent will lead them to trusting you.

^^^THIS^^^ Just be honest with them and include them in on the details. You'r family should be a support system. And if they can see you are sincerely making healthy life style changes, then they would probably be willing to support rather than throw accusations.

Sabine_Stroehm

I am having to do the same thing! My ma's bf is the one that always accuses me of being too thin though. I'm 25 lbs from my goal weight. It's just that I'm actually trying to lose weight the healthy way but my family won't listen to that...all they hear is me trying to lose weight which must mean I'm starving myself. I just make food openly in front of them a lot and ask them to go get the items that I need from the grocery store so they know that I am eating. I don't tell them how much I exercise but I'm also by myself a lot and I'll be going back to school soon.

Also some red flags... (along with your user name). Please be careful folks. If lots of folks are worried, perhaps there's a reason...

scriehl

Hey everyone I'm currently 155 pounds at 5'7 and I'm 20 pounds away from my goal weight. However, I need to hide the fact that I'm dieting from my family. Today my mom straight out accused me of dieting, which I denied. I used to have an eating disorder which is why she is concerned, but I'm losing weight the healthy way this time. How can I make it less obvious that I am trying to lose weight, and what should I say if she makes another comment?

First of all congrats on choosing to loose weight the healthy way this time around. Good for you. Secondly, I would be open and honest with your family and ask for their support. Good luck to you.

scriehl

Tell your family you are on a lifestyle change and they can track your progress anytime online.

The hardest part is actually telling them. Being transparent will lead them to trusting you.

^^^THIS^^^ Just be honest with them and include them in on the details. You'r family should be a support system. And if they can see you are sincerely making healthy life style changes, then they would probably be willing to support rather than throw accusations.

Totally!

nikkiprickett

Has it occurred to you that attempting to hide weight loss is an ED red flag? If you're lying to your mother, you may not be doing this the "healthy way". Talk it out with your family.

yeah this is my thought. you should def not have to hide anything, if anything I'd think you'd be super excited to share the fact that you're dong this the healthy way!

Goal_Line

Attempting to hide something is a sure sign of a problem. Why can;t you be honest with the people you love?

rachel7mj

Hey, first off, definitely good for you for trying to lose weight the healthy way. Secondly, I do sort of understand what you're going through. I have a friend who is doing this site with me, her mom sees 'healthy' as being slightly overweight, my friend feels like she has to hide the fact that she's dieting because her mom will make her eat more if she finds out. Overall, your parents just want what they think is best for you, I agree with what other people are saying, you should show your parents what you are doing and do your research, be able to prove that what you are doing is VERY HEALTHY for your body. I mean, you only get one body in this life, make the most of it!!!

Get_Me_Fit1

Has it occurred to you that attempting to hide weight loss is an ED red flag? If you're lying to your mother, you may not be doing this the "healthy way". Talk it out with your family.

THIS^^^

YES

recoiljpr

Has it occurred to you that attempting to hide weight loss is an ED red flag? If you're lying to your mother, you may not be doing this the "healthy way". Talk it out with your family.

As someone who not too long ago had a loved one reveal they hid and lied about a Eating Disorder for 14 years, I completely agree. I don't know if previously you hid the ED from your family or not. But in my case, it was hidden from me and it is taking me a long time to learn to trust again when it comes to food with that person.

Maybe setup a doctor appointment with a GP and discuss it with your doctor, see if your doctor agrees with what you are doing. If your doctor does, then your golden on the health side and let your family know. But you have to be completely transparent and honest with them about it due to your previous history. If you get caught in a lie, nothing good will come from it, and it will only cause friction within your family

alysabourne

Ok so first of all you can't say "I use to have a eating disorder" You always have to fight with an eating disorder for the rest of your life! I have an eating disorder was diagnosed in 2003. Second of all your BMI is already in normal range so you don't need to lose any weight! If you don't feel good about your looks that is another sign that you eating disorder is flaring up. Try to tone your body and not lose weight but be careful you NEED to eat MORE calories and protien as you tone. That is why I signed up for myfitnesspal to make sure that I am eating enough cals as I tone my body. Also ASK your mom to help you tone up and tell her about the feelings you have! She can help you out!

Crisitunity

My advice? Move out.