Being responsible sucks

toots99

I got done with work early tonight, and just didn't feel like going home. I felt like going out, but all my friends were still at work. I thought, "Oh well, I can walk to the bar...have a beer or two." Then I thought "But I don't feel like drinking by myself, and I do have a beer or two, I'll get hungry and I'll eat crappy food and end up hating myself and I'll feel crappy and won't go to the gym tomorrow...FINE! I guess I'll go home." :grumble:

Being responsible sucks.

itsmenatalie

:laugh: yeah it does! But the end results will be worth it!

toots99

True, I just wonder when (if ever) I'll ever be able to go out and just enjoy myself without obsessing about it. :laugh: I just want to be normal like other people and go out and have fun and not either a) hate myself for giving in and enjoying myself or b) deprive myself and not enjoy it. :grumble:

Zara11

True, I just wonder when (if ever) I'll ever be able to go out and just enjoy myself without obsessing about it. :laugh: I just want to be normal like other people and go out and have fun and not either a) hate myself for giving in and enjoying myself or b) deprive myself and not enjoy it. :grumble:

Sounds like you have an idea... if you're going to go out and drink and eat, do it with other people, and save your alone time to take care of yourself!

toots99

Alone or not, it'd be the same scenario. :laugh:

chellebelle315

Just a thought...spend some time thinking about why it is you're going out....is it about crappy bar food and beer, or is it about the social interaction? if its for fun you can drink club soda or iced tea, eat the carrot sticks out of the basket of wings, and leave the icky food....

It does suck at first to have to put so much thought into something that you do for fun, like going out, but a little pre-planning and decision making ahead of time....what am i going to drink?....what am i going to eat there?...if my food choices are going to be limited should I eat before i go?....what healthy snacks can i keep in my desk/purse so that if I get the chance to go out with friends i won't be starving and eat the chicken-fried eggrolls? Can I have one beer, enjoy it, log the calories, and not beat myself up about it?...

Breaking bad habits, especially unconscious ones (for me so many of my bad eating habits are just because I go unconscious and don't think about what I'm doing) takes some practice, but the extra work is worth it if you've considered your motivation and are really committed to looking at things differently...

then it gets easier, and stops sucking so much...and you start having fun without worrying about it because the healthy choices become second nature...

Just keep at it, and remember what you want, and why.

toots99

Just a thought...spend some time thinking about why it is you're going out....is it about crappy bar food and beer, or is it about the social interaction? if its for fun you can drink club soda or iced tea, eat the carrot sticks out of the basket of wings, and leave the icky food....

It's about beer and being social. Unfortunately I'm still sort of new around here, and don't know anyone, so it's tough to be social when I don't know anyone. :laugh:

It's no big deal, I was just feeling sorry for myself. I'm sick of not knowing people and having to limit
myself on what I can and can't eat or drink. I am not really the type of person who can have one cookie or one beer...I'm more like an all or nothing personality. :grumble:

July

Sometimes, I just don't want to go home, too.
That's when I go shopping - calorie free!

shedivine18

Just think about how much more fun your going to be having ..skinny...lol i find that when i stay home i eat more, i would rather go out, and just limit my self, like a diet coke, no beer! its just sooo bad! I used to be 205...so i know its hard, but don't worry, socially you will get used to being the DD for a little while!

BrendaLee

Being responsible is the responsible thing to do. You don't need beer or crappy food to have fun. Pretend you're drunk- no one will know the difference.

toots99

Being responsible is the responsible thing to do. You don't need beer or crappy food to have fun. Pretend you're drunk- no one will know the difference.

:laugh: Great, so I'll be the girl sitting by herself at a bar pretending to be drunk. Someone will definitely want to hang out with me then! :laugh:

Azdak

True, I just wonder when (if ever) I'll ever be able to go out and just enjoy myself without obsessing about it. :laugh: I just want to be normal like other people and go out and have fun and not either a) hate myself for giving in and enjoying myself or b) deprive myself and not enjoy it. :grumble:

I belong to a neighborhood wine-tasting group and I decided that, during our once a month tasting parties, I wasn't going to obsess about it. I backed of somewhat from previous habits--held back a little on the cheeses, breads, and desserts--and took some modestly smaller tasting pours as well--but I also decided that I was going to enjoy myself on those evenings and not sulk in the corner. I tried to make sure I threw in an extra workout the day of or the day after (or both), and did just fine.

I also find that now that I am 7 mos down the road, have lost 50+ pounds and picked up a little muscle, I can occasionally relax a little at social events. Again, it takes 3500 calories to gain a pound also, so going over by even 1000 on a "bad" night should not wreck your program.

I also find that I don't need to "indulge" as much as before--partly it's a renewed self-confidence and partly it's the idea that I have worked too damn hard to get to this point to throw it all away.

OTOH, the temptations are still there. I was in a real quandry today. It is my birthday, and in the past that meant either a big restaurant meal or a deep-dish pizza at home, followed by a premium-quality (and horrendously non-nutritious) birthday cake. As I went though the day today, my wife kept trying to get me to do something similar to the past (partly out of feelings of guilt because she didn't do anything for me at all). But, as I went over the alternatives, I just couldn't bring myself to load up on a million extra calories--so I ended up doing nothing. That may end up being worse, since it turned out to be a perfectly awful birthday, and the temptation to go out tomorrow will be even stronger. I am really going to have to have my game face on tomorrow.

toots99

Aw, I was going to say "Hope you had a happy Birthday!" until I saw that you didn't enjoy your birthday. I'm sorry. :ohwell:

Here's a birthday gift for you from me, a pretty little flower and a smile. :flowerforyou: Tomorrow will be better.