The Fake Sugar that causes me Gym Stress!!
d2footballJRC
Posts: 2,684 Member
in Chit-Chat
The Fake Sugar that causes me Gym Stress!!
Sucralose…. You suck.
WOW… How embarrassing. That is how to put mildly my experience at the gym on recently. (It was more of an OMFG, to the high heavens what did I do to deserve this punishment! I am more embarrassed than every time I cry in the years I’ve spent in therapy.)
BackStory: I’ve been trying to eat lower sugar. Thus I’ve been hitting the low sugar things. A couple of my items has this artificial sugar called Sucralose in it. I should be called “Succubus Sinful You Will be Punished for eating me Fake Sugar”. I have no idea why exactly (I’m a computer nerd not a chemist), but it just destroys my stomach. By destroying my stomach I mean gas/farts that sound like I’m creating my own dubstep track. They end up smelling worse than a can of cat food in a public toilet! Regardless I ate some sugar free icecream and didn’t notice that Sucralose was the fake sugar in it. (I was craving ice cream and I was in a hurry.) I ate about 1 cup total of it.
Well a couple hours later I head to the gym and pick heavy things up. (Sometimes lighter things just many times) Well in the middle of doing some squats my stomach starts rumbling and I’m like uh oh.. Anyways I think maybe it’s just a quick one. So I barking spider one out and keep on squatting. I go up and think hmm, doesn’t smell victory! Then I squat down and my eyes water and I smell something horrendous. I pumped out a couple more quick squats and decided I better move on to the next exercise. I had a couple more issues with gas but it seemed like it was going away and luckily no one was in the weight room portion. So I finished up and I head to the treadmills.
On the treadmills it must have been the moving but it got BAD. It felt like a 6.0 earthquake going off in my stomach and I tried my best to hold them in but a couple snuck out. They were quiet but they were horrible. I felt so bad, but it took the cake when someone 3 treadmills down started coughing. I quit immediately and just went home. Thank the heavens it wasn't the hot chick with a red thong that works out!
How I hate fake sugars. They all seem to upset my stomach. (Oh and I know some of you will have snoody comments… It’s okay you weren’t loved enough as a child. (There got that out of the way. ))
I would like to end in a song..
Yo, VIP, let's kick it!
D2football baby
D2football baby
All right stop
Collaborate and listen
JR is back with my brand new rendition
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Then I flow with a harpoon of farts daily and nightly
Will it ever stop?
Yo, I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll go
To the extreme I stink up a gym like a vandal
Stink up a room and need to a light up a candle
Dance
Bum rush the sucralose that booms
I'm killin' your brain like a poisonous mushroom
Deadly, when I play a fart melody
Anything less that the best is a felony
Love it or leave it
You better gain way
You better hit bull's eye
The kid don't play
If there was a problem
Yo, I'll solve it
Check out the smell while my Sucralose revolves it
Now that the party is stinking
With the bass kicked in, the farts are rumblin'
Quick to the point, to the point no faking
I'm cooking MC's like a pound of bacon
Burning them if they're not quick and nimble
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal
And a hi hat with a souped up tempo
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo
Rollin in my 5.0
KICK IT YO!
Sucralose…. You suck.
WOW… How embarrassing. That is how to put mildly my experience at the gym on recently. (It was more of an OMFG, to the high heavens what did I do to deserve this punishment! I am more embarrassed than every time I cry in the years I’ve spent in therapy.)
BackStory: I’ve been trying to eat lower sugar. Thus I’ve been hitting the low sugar things. A couple of my items has this artificial sugar called Sucralose in it. I should be called “Succubus Sinful You Will be Punished for eating me Fake Sugar”. I have no idea why exactly (I’m a computer nerd not a chemist), but it just destroys my stomach. By destroying my stomach I mean gas/farts that sound like I’m creating my own dubstep track. They end up smelling worse than a can of cat food in a public toilet! Regardless I ate some sugar free icecream and didn’t notice that Sucralose was the fake sugar in it. (I was craving ice cream and I was in a hurry.) I ate about 1 cup total of it.
Well a couple hours later I head to the gym and pick heavy things up. (Sometimes lighter things just many times) Well in the middle of doing some squats my stomach starts rumbling and I’m like uh oh.. Anyways I think maybe it’s just a quick one. So I barking spider one out and keep on squatting. I go up and think hmm, doesn’t smell victory! Then I squat down and my eyes water and I smell something horrendous. I pumped out a couple more quick squats and decided I better move on to the next exercise. I had a couple more issues with gas but it seemed like it was going away and luckily no one was in the weight room portion. So I finished up and I head to the treadmills.
On the treadmills it must have been the moving but it got BAD. It felt like a 6.0 earthquake going off in my stomach and I tried my best to hold them in but a couple snuck out. They were quiet but they were horrible. I felt so bad, but it took the cake when someone 3 treadmills down started coughing. I quit immediately and just went home. Thank the heavens it wasn't the hot chick with a red thong that works out!
How I hate fake sugars. They all seem to upset my stomach. (Oh and I know some of you will have snoody comments… It’s okay you weren’t loved enough as a child. (There got that out of the way. ))
I would like to end in a song..
Yo, VIP, let's kick it!
D2football baby
D2football baby
All right stop
Collaborate and listen
JR is back with my brand new rendition
Something grabs a hold of me tightly
Then I flow with a harpoon of farts daily and nightly
Will it ever stop?
Yo, I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll go
To the extreme I stink up a gym like a vandal
Stink up a room and need to a light up a candle
Dance
Bum rush the sucralose that booms
I'm killin' your brain like a poisonous mushroom
Deadly, when I play a fart melody
Anything less that the best is a felony
Love it or leave it
You better gain way
You better hit bull's eye
The kid don't play
If there was a problem
Yo, I'll solve it
Check out the smell while my Sucralose revolves it
Now that the party is stinking
With the bass kicked in, the farts are rumblin'
Quick to the point, to the point no faking
I'm cooking MC's like a pound of bacon
Burning them if they're not quick and nimble
I go crazy when I hear a cymbal
And a hi hat with a souped up tempo
I'm on a roll and it's time to go solo
Rollin in my 5.0
KICK IT YO!
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Replies
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Im sorry.. im laughing my *kitten* off right now..0
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You farted at the gym.0
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Whey does that to me...
Casein, the tougher to digest milk protein supprisingly doesn't even effect me (which is why if you'll check my diary it's my protein supplement of choice).
You haven't lived until you've farted on a squat spotter btw...0 -
You farted at the gym.
repeatedly. I would of been okay had they not been making people cough.0 -
Whey does that to me...
Casein, the tougher to digest milk protein supprisingly doesn't even effect me (which is why if you'll check my diary it's my protein supplement of choice).
You haven't lived until you've farted on a squat spotter btw...
That is interesting. I haven't had any problems with protein powders. SuperPump PWO causes me major stomach discomfort as well.0 -
JR, you're one of my favorites
love the song. I'll have it memorized in no time 0 -
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !!!!
That song just radiates awesome :laugh:0 -
You may have made this up as a joke but this is the exact reason I can't have Splenda. I get so.sick.
It's in everything (even BREAD?!?!) and I hate it.0 -
You may have made this up as a joke but this is the exact reason I can't have Splenda. I get so.sick.
It's in everything (even BREAD?!?!) and I hate it.
This is not a joke, sucralose kills me. Badly.0 -
ohhhhh!!!! lmao!!! sorry abt ur fake sugar issues! :laugh:0
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Bump0
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Word to ya Mutha!
Love this post0 -
that sounds very much like a lactose intolerence. either way sorry to hear you had to leave the gym. made for an entertaining story though.0
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that sounds very much like a lactose intolerence. either way sorry to hear you had to leave the gym. made for an entertaining story though.
It seems to be sucralose. Gum and Mints with Sucralose in it does it to me as well.0 -
lmao this made me laugh so hard!0
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JR, you're one of my favorites love the song. I'll have it memorized in no time
Im so glad you are my friend on here!0 -
ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:0 -
Tonight was a MUCH better night at the gym. No fake sugars today!0
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You already wrote the song so might as well pull out the camera and record it0
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That story made me laugh... cause I sometimes do the same thing(shocker I know!)
That being said, maybe you are allergic to them. My mom is allergic to certain artificial sweeteners, and she always breaks out in a rash and has stomach issues when she eats something that has equal or nutra sweet in it.0 -
I am sorry about your fake sugar/gastro-intestinal issues, but it is classic that somebody three machines down started coughing. I would probably have left too, but would be chuckling to myself and then tell some of my fartypants friends.0
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You already wrote the song so might as well pull out the camera and record it
Im way way too ugly to be on camera!0 -
I was craving ice cream and I was in a hurry
Best thing I have read in ages!!! Haha!!0 -
I was craving ice cream and I was in a hurry
Best thing I have read in ages!!! Haha!!
Thanks for reading!0 -
It's not the smell or the burning around the eyes that bothers us ...it's the fact that we can taste it that sometimes seems to be a bit of a invasion. Thanks for heading home with that. sorry about the work out.0
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Well that has made my day. If it makes you feel better, whey concentrate gets me. Isolate and I get along just fine though.
That said, I can't tolerate Aspartame. It makes my eyes twitch like I'm on drugs or something and makes me feel super nauseous.0 -
Well that has made my day. If it makes you feel better, whey concentrate gets me. Isolate and I get along just fine though.
That said, I can't tolerate Aspartame. It makes my eyes twitch like I'm on drugs or something and makes me feel super nauseous.
Luckily none of the fake stuff makes my eyes twitch or anything like that!0
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