how do you invite a girl to a movie but not as a date?

Laces_0ut
Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
edited December 26 in Chit-Chat
i moved to Phoenix a little over a year ago and have been meeting new people through groups like Meet Up. sometimes ill meet a girl who i'm not interested in dating but i would like to be friends with...see movies, play pub trivia, go places etc...

whats the best way to ask them while making it clear its not a date?

ive tried just being casual and saying hey we should check out that new movie. but even if the plan is to meet there i get the sense they were thinking it was somethig more sometimes.
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Replies

  • ElizabethRoad
    ElizabethRoad Posts: 5,138 Member
    Bring some other friends?
  • ShareeMorty
    ShareeMorty Posts: 324 Member
    Just be honest, say you would like to be friends with her and ask her if she would like to hang out sometime. We like having guy friends too and as long as you are up front and honest with her about where you stand she will appreciate it, if she chooses not to be friends with you it is her loss.
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    Bring some other friends?

    no problems in that scenario. much less of a chance of misunderstanding.
  • REALBIGBATBASTARD
    REALBIGBATBASTARD Posts: 103 Member
    stop it
  • Voncreepy2
    Voncreepy2 Posts: 1,450 Member
    Ummmmm, say I just wanna go see a movie...not a date?
    teehee
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    Just be honest, say you would like to be friends with her and ask her if she would like to hang out sometime. We like having guy friends too and as long as you are up front and honest with her about where you stand she will appreciate it, if she chooses not to be friends with you it is her loss.

    for some reason that just seems forced to me to come right out and say "lets be friends" but maybe it is for the best.

    im really just looking for some kind of code phrase. like "would you like to come in for some coffee" at 2 a.m. is not really about coffee...but the "lets be friends" equivalent. :)
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    stop it

    stop what?
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
    Just ask her.
    I think us men over think things sometimes.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    ask her to see it, but make sure you dont send out date signals like paying for her ticket, meeting with her before hand or putting her hand on your penis.
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    I recently went through this myself(met people through Meetup and a guy asked me for coffee on Tuesday.. now I'm stuck wondering if it's a date or friends getting to know each other!)

    Just shoot her an email that says hey, I enjoyed meeting you and was wondering if you would like to hang out again doing XYZ.
    I'm not interested in dating but i would like to be friends.. and leave it at that!
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    I recently went through this myself(met people through Meetup and a guy asked me for coffee on Tuesday.. now I'm stuck wondering if it's a date or friends getting to know each other!)

    Just shoot her an email that says hey, I enjoyed meeting you and was wondering if you would like to hang out again doing XYZ.
    I'm not interested in dating but i would like to be friends.. and leave it at that!


    thats definitely a good idea, but i am interested in dating and am hoping to meet people in those Meet Up groups and wouldnt want to lie to her.
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    ask her to see it, but make sure you dont send out date signals like paying for her ticket, meeting with her before hand or putting her hand on your penis.

    wait a minute...its not normal to place friend's hands on my penis? no wonder so many think im interested and/or gay!!!
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    seriously though, i think you should just ask her, not send out any confusing signals (like offering to pay for the ticket) and only bring up the fact that you dont like her in THAT way if you the impression she thinks of you that way.

    you canalso try the subtle hint like asking if she things men and women can have strictly platonic relationships
  • stephensmith0929
    stephensmith0929 Posts: 160
    Its tough if your Fred Willard!!
  • Rosa1213
    Rosa1213 Posts: 456 Member
    Hm, this is a tough call...

    I think that I'd feel less confused if someone invited me to hang out with more friends, as a group. Also, perhaps mention the word "friends" nonchalantly someplace in the email? Something along the lines of: "You strike me as quite interesting, and I think we could be friends. Email me if you want to catch a movie sometime :)"
  • emdeegan
    emdeegan Posts: 219 Member
    ok.. here's the deal.. you don't..
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    ok.. here's the deal.. you don't..

    why not?
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    I recently went through this myself(met people through Meetup and a guy asked me for coffee on Tuesday.. now I'm stuck wondering if it's a date or friends getting to know each other!)

    Just shoot her an email that says hey, I enjoyed meeting you and was wondering if you would like to hang out again doing XYZ.
    I'm not interested in dating but i would like to be friends.. and leave it at that!


    thats definitely a good idea, but i am interested in dating and am hoping to meet people in those Meet Up groups and wouldnt want to lie to her.

    True, but you are not interested in dating that specific girl.. so in that case you aren't lying if you tell her you aren't interested in dating her.

    You could also say something like I am interested in dating, but I'm trying to meet people and make friends before I start dating anyone. That way she knows your intentions, but also realizes that you are trying to be social and not just rushing into anything.
  • Laces_0ut
    Laces_0ut Posts: 3,750 Member
    mesha and rosa i like those ideas. thanks.
  • IAmFranciscoB
    IAmFranciscoB Posts: 125
    sounds like the FRIEND ZONE
  • VogtAndrea
    VogtAndrea Posts: 236
    How about " Would you be willing to go to a movie with me, not as a date but as my friend?" What's so hard about that?
  • blair_bear
    blair_bear Posts: 165
    Just ask her.
    I think us men over think things sometimes.
    Yeah you do. If someone said "I'm going to see ____, do you want to go?" I wouldn't think it was a date. If someone said "Do you want to go see a movie sometime?" I would think he was asking me out.
  • AggieLu
    AggieLu Posts: 873 Member
    Keeping it up front and real with the girl.
  • shaynak112
    shaynak112 Posts: 751 Member
    Bring friends OR just tell her. Say "I'm just interested in being friends, I'd just like to hang out with you, but that's all, nothing more than friendship" well something along the lines of that :p She may be more comfortable then!
  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,450 Member
    Just try "youre a lot of fun. I think we'd make great friends. Want to go do x,y,z later this week?"
  • MyOwnSunshine
    MyOwnSunshine Posts: 1,312 Member
    Say something like, "Hey we have a lot in common. We should be friends. Wanna catch a movie on Saturday with me?"

    I have to admit that I always had the opposite problem when I was single. Guys that were in my social circle would ask me to do something and I'd assume it was just as friends... not thinking they would want to date me. It does make for a weird vibe if you're not on the same page.
  • weevil66
    weevil66 Posts: 600 Member
    I guess the bottom line is you don't ask her up to see your etchings. Or as previously stated, put her hand on your penis. This also rules out putting your penis through the hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket.

    I think Juliecat1 worded it well.
  • caraiselite
    caraiselite Posts: 2,631 Member
    'hey do you want to go see that new movie? just as friends, not a date!'

    pretty simple.
  • Tony_Brewski
    Tony_Brewski Posts: 1,376 Member
    Yo I got an extra movie ticket... wanna check this **** out with me? Pffft no its not a date... you dumb?

    lol


    Just be straight up honest is all.
  • JeaninePaige
    JeaninePaige Posts: 464 Member
    "Wanna go see a movie? Not a date or anything, just as friends?"
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