losing a beloved pet

filthyassbassdrop

anyone out there ever lose a beloved pet?.....any suggestions on how to cope and deal?......my cat got hit by a car and killed yesterday and it's been the roughest 24 hours ever.....how soon is too soon to find a new kitty....also if anyone wants to add me thats totally cool,,,,,,,always looking for cool,new friends.....thanks guys

rbl1225

First of all I am so sorry to hear this! I have lost a couple it's really hard especially if you treated them like family (I know we did). As for the right time there never really is a right time. I know when my dog (17 years old) goes it is going to hurt my family a lot but I know my mom already decided she wants to get another dog right afterwards because that dog really is hers and it will kill her not to have her around. My advice to you is do what you think is right. If you think you are ready maybe just go and look at a pet store if you don't think you're ready you can leave. If you think you need one to cope and are ready for a new pet then all the power to you! Hang in there I know it's tough but do whatever you need to do.

dmoses

I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine losing one of my fur-babies to something like that. My heart goes out to you...

I have gotten 'transition' dogs when mine get older so that I will have one when the other one is not with me any longer. It's tough, but I couldn't have a house without at least 2 dogs in it!

marvelscale

Whenever you're ready is a good time; or you don't have to get a new pet if you don't want to. Some people don't. I lost two puppies to some illness I can't remember when I was around 7, so I don't know exactly how I dealt with it. My little snake, aged over 10 years passed away just suddenly overnight a few months ago, but that isn't quite the same. I'm so sorry that happened, it's hard losing a pet.

GemaG

My year old cat met the same fate about a month ago. We were all devasted but went and got a new kitten 2 days later. It stopped me and the kids from crying and she has really helped to make us all smile again. She is completley different to the first cat in colour and personality so we look at her as a new cat and not a replacement. I still miss the old cat every day but the new one has certainly helped. I hope you start to feel a little better soon, sending you friend request as any animal lovers are great in my book

asaw00

Sorry for your loss!! My cat of 13 years just died on July 17. It was awful and the kids devastated. We decided not to get another cat, I think its a personal decision.

EnchantedEvening

I am so sorry.

I had to put my cat to sleep a couple of years ago. I'd had him for 12 years, ever since I moved out and started college. He'd been with me through everything. I cried and cried for days. Then, over time, I didn't cry as much. It still hurts, and I still miss him. I still cry sometimes. It's completely normal/natural to grieve for a pet.

Don't rush into getting a new cat if you aren't ready yet. I still haven't gotten a new one. I miss having a kitty, but I'm also not sure if I want to go through that much pain again. I would love to rescue a kitty from the shelter, and I'm sure I will soon, but it's just not time yet. Everyone is different. Just go with what feels right to you. Don't let anyone pressure you.

Again, I am really sorry. Losing a pet is one of the hardest things ever.

ColleenRoss50

I am sorry for your loss. Throughout my life, I have almost always had one or more pets and I know how difficult it is to lose them. We all go through a grieving process and it will get easier with time although they will never be forgotten.

As for when to get another pet, there is no right or wrong answer. They are all individuals with their own personalities and, like "two legged animals," can never be replaced. Some people get another pet almost immediately. For me it has always taken several months for the healing process to take place before I felt ready to fully open my heart to new pet. You will know when the time is right for you. I remember many years ago when I lost a cat suddenly and tragically and my husband, seeing how much I was grieving thought he was helping me by coming home with another cat three days later. I made him take it back because I simply wasn't ready to accept a new animal into my life when the wounds were so fresh. To this day, when I think about it I feel bad about it and I wonder what happened to that cat and what kind of a life it had, but I just wasn't ready at that time. Hopefully he found another home where he was loved. Three months later, when another cat came into my life, I was ready and we had that one for seventeen years.

OnionMomma

Our lab passed away a year ago this past December. She was almost 11.

We only lasted about 2 months before getting a puppy. Our house is not a "home" with out a dog in it. the cat isn't too happy about "Twinkie" though, she's a yellow lab. The lab we lost was a black lab and we just could not bring our selves to get another lab of the same color.

For us, getting the puppy helped heal the hurt of losing Onyx.

ZugTheMegasaurus

I am so sorry to hear that. My dog had to be put to sleep a little over a year ago after suffering a couple strokes; I felt horrible because I'd moved away for law school and didn't get to say goodbye. My other dog is an elderly 13 year old (well, elderly since she's been a big 85-pounder her whole life) and is dealing with cancer. My dad says she still has a really good quality of life right now, but we'll be losing her soon too. These were dogs that really helped define me as a person, silly as it sounds. They helped me through serious long-term illnesses, depression, even helped me get my first job as a teenager where I was a dog trainer.

It's hard, but just remember the fond memories. And remember that getting another pet isn't replacing them or somehow an insult; it's a tribute to the great times you had and wanting to share that with another pet in the future. You make their lives better than they would be if you weren't around, and they do the same for you. The sad parts don't take that away.

daisiecpa

i am so sorry for your loss. i know how hard it is to lose pets. over the last few years 4 of my cats passed away. they were all older but it was so hard i still think about them everyday. i was not going to get anymore because of the hurt you go through when they get sick and old. plus my boy cat joey had major surgery i was still paying for. he is still alive and doing great now. then 1 day last year i got a knock at my door from a neighbor that there were 4 kittens living under my trailer. well i could only find homes for 2 of them so i kept 2. best thing that has happened. they brought back so much joy to my life. again so sorry for your loss but when your ready go get 2 kittens around the same age. it really is the best thing ever to watch them grow up together and play etc.

allsetnow

I am so sorry for what you are going through. It really is like losing a member of your family, and people who don't have pets (or even some who do) can't really understand what you are going through. It is somehow less acceptable to grieve for a lost pet than for a lost human.

We lost a wonderful two year old cat several ago to a congenital heart defect we did not even know he had. He seemed perfectly healthy and then just suddenly died one night. That was awful, and the kids were devastated. We waited about 4 months to get another kitten -- she is now almost 9 (and has since been joined by 3 others....)

We lost our beloved Golden Retriever at age 13. We knew it was time to let her go (she had cancer), but it was terrible. I thought at the time we would not get another dog; I did not think I could love another animal as much as I loved her and did not want to get as attached again Well, about 4-5 months later, my husband decided he could not live without a dog. I was against it at first, and our daughter was really upset, feeling like it would be really disloyal to our first dog. But I did not want to deprive him of something that he obviously wanted/needed so much, so we went ahead and got two (!) Golden Retriever puppies. We all love them madly and they have brought so much happiness into our lives. I still think about our first dog all the time, and miss her, but it does not hurt as much anymore.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Falcon

I'm sorry to hear about your loss

I lost my kitty to some weird chest infection about a month ago. I was just devastated. A complete and emotional wreak for a couple of days. I would go for walks with this cat. Yup you heard that right, the cat was part dog because he heeled by my left side.

As for a new kitty. I still haven't gotten another cat yet. I don't know if I can go through that pain again. Because even going for walks was a painful reminder.

It'll get a little better in the first couple of weeks and I find it also has to do with how bonded you were with the cat. I find you have to let yourself heal first before you feel you're ready to take on another pet.

Trechechus

I'm so sorry. Pets are like your kids and losing them is hard!

I think you're the only one who can decide when then right time is to fill that gap with a new kitty. If it were me, When I lose a pet, I tend to wait a while before I go out in search of a new fuzzy housemate. I pay my respects to my friend, first. But, I know people who go out and adopt a new somebody as soon as possible because the void is too much to handle alone.

Either way, I wish you healing and again, I'm so sorry for your loss.

cobebu8

It is a devastating experience and I am so very sorry. I have lost 3 cats and every single time, I felt completely overwhelmed. What helped me was not to deny my emotions, own them and feel them. Then I got another cat within a few days. Why? Because there are so many homeless animals and I felt good giving a loving home to another cat. I still cried on and off but I was helped by having a new member to my family.

This is what has worked for me. I hope you find solace and a way to heal the pay. God bless you and keep up with your health goals here at MFP.

BerylX

I am so sorry for your loss.

I myself have lost a few cats, through the years, most to old age (Dolly 18, Tiger 16, Katie 21, Patches 14, Carmel 12) and am dealing wih a broken jaw on one that was hit by a car over a month ago. (Molly, 3) She is healing well though I though we'd lose her.
I loved them all, they were/are part of the family. It was especially difficult with katie, she was the last we had, leaving us empty nesters, and we had decided when her time came to adopt a mature older cat from a rescue shelter. (we ended up with a surprise litter of 2 kittens from my sister-in-law's cat though instead)
As for a new cat, It is a very personal decision, I myself have found that after a bit of grieving time I need to refocus on the current living kitties out there and there are a lot that need loving homes. I still miss my babies that have passed and still shed a tear for them, I find having new fuzzy life to look after (not replacements though) keeps the pain from being so harsh.

2hobbit1

Sorry for your loss.
Having been through this with several kinds of pets I feel your pain. I have taken various lengths of time before rescuing another shelter critter to fill the empty place left by the one that passed.
Some times it was because I was respecting the feelings of other family members and some times just due to the logistics of finding the right age and sex pet to join an existing group.
Once they are in their new home you will be amazed at how whole you fell once again. They are not a replacement as you will never erase your memories of your missing companion, but they have their own personalities and quirks and have a whole lot of love to share.
If you feel that you need to do this now - go on line to petfinder.com and see who is available in your area. It could be love at first sight.

LorinaLynn

I'm sorry for your loss. It's hard.

I still had two other cats and the dog when my old girl Sheba died. At first, we thought, "We're not going to get a replacement." Because there is no replacement. But a few years later, we decided, "Well... maybe a kitten."

That VERY SAME DAY, I found and captured a feral kitten living under my neighbor's porch. Two days later, the neighbors caught another and gave him to me. We were going to try to catch the rest and I was going to rehome them, but mamacat moved the litter.

Since then, more cats have found their way into my heart and home and we now have seven. :blushing:

Sheba, who I adopted in 1989, was the last cat I actively LOOKED to acquire. The rest just happened to me.

bobie1978

Sorry about your cat I lost one of mine a few years ago. I would say definitely get a new kitten.. right now there are so many and they need homes. Also, keep them inside gives them a longer life and keeps them healthy

ohmariposa

Sorry about your loss. Pets are family members. I would say grieve a bit and then start looking for a new one. It will help fill the void in your heart,

yocando

Rough stuff for sure... so sorry that happened.
Feel the loss- don't eat through the pain.
When the time is right, you'll know the best decision for your situation.
furry felines rock! I love mine like a child... he's spoiled rotten but deserves it.
perhaps a trip to the satellite adoption center in your nearest pet store might ease it a bit... I always love to go there.

Good you reached out to share.