Comfort eating and Fighting off old feelings

MommyRobin

It's going to be a tough couple of days. It's TOM and my husband's grandmother passed away Sunday. Before, I would have comforted myself and my family with food. And there's no shortage of food from thoughtful friends of the family. I have found that I can comfort my hubby and his family just as well with hugs and pics & stories of Grandma. I just have to stay in control in social situations of the snacky foods that are sitting around because of convenience. It's really hard because when I went through my last miscarriage almost 9 yrs. ago, his Grandma had a major stroke and had last rites said over her. She pulled through, but I went into a deep depression after losing my 3rd baby at 14 weeks and feeling like noone cared or aknowledged my loss. That's when I starting putting on all the weight. Losing Grandma reminds me of that time of our lives. I'm okay now. But, those feelings rush back sometimes. Just need some encouraging words and prayers from my great MFP friends. Thanks for always supporting me.

Assassins_Angel

Hey

I am sorry for yours and your family's loss!! It's never easy losing a loved one especially during TOM when your emotions can be at their highest! I applaud you for even trying to restrain yourself foodwise as I know some people, myself included, would have given up and turned to food for comfort.

That being said you also need to allow yourself to grieve too, if you do give in to food for comfort a few times, don't sweat it! A few days off will not hurt your weightloss journey too much Just pick it back up when you are ready.

My prayers and thoughts are with you and feel free to add me if you need a friendly ear to vent at sometimes talking things through helps people grieve too x

beachlover317

I have lost some people in my life that were very important to me, but never a child. My friends who have and my mother who lost my sister to cancer at 50, tell me that this is the most devastating loss of all. I am so sorry that you are going through this and can absolutely understand how one thing triggers another memory. How strong you are to be planning how you will work through these feelings without falling back on food. You are obviously a stong woman and I hope you know that there are a lot of people pulling for you to get through these next few days. Stay strong!

MommyRobin

Thanks, ladies. It really helps to hear from you. It's amazing how much comfort you can get just by typing it out and getting a little feedback from strangers, without worrying about being judged.

Restybaby2012

MommyR...you ever get over losses like that. I dont believe there is ever any "closure" as they say. Gawd I hate that word anyway. Closure?? What the frick is closure? No.....you dont "get over it".......but you do get used to it. You and the pain become initmate friends though you hate each other.

My sincerest condolences for your losses and all you're going thru. Just remember it is a part of living. You are much stronger than you realize and as humans, we adapt well even when we dont want to. Offer what strength and compassion you can to your groom and all those you care about. Let the love and support as well as compassion flow in and out. Dont be hard on yourself or others during this time. Try to remember there are people who care about you and support you.

Come here often and share with us, cry with us, laugh with us but mostly just be with us during this struggle. Food wont support you near as well as we will. We care more than the food too.

Stand Strong Mommy R

MommyRobin

@RestyBaby-Thank you so much! You are right. I am not over my pain and loss. I never will be. I just got through it. I am so glad to have this forum to help me through all kinds of struggles. Weight loss related or not. And you're cat is adorable! I have 3 furry babies of my own. lol

AthenaErr

I am so sorry for your loss. Its always so hard to lose someone and often it brings past losses to the forefront as well. Stay strong and take time for yourself and your grief. Its also a really big step to realise you can give and receive comfort in other ways than food so good on you for embracing that. You are in my thoughts. Big hug x

MommyRobin

So many thoughts running through my head tonight. I can't turn them off. And I don't want to visit those dark places tonight. I just keep telling myself that Grandma Verrett and my Bigmama have finally met in Heaven and that they are taking such good care of my babies. Praying for peace and comfort for our family.

linea27

It's going to be a tough couple of days. It's TOM and my husband's grandmother passed away Sunday. Before, I would have comforted myself and my family with food. And there's no shortage of food from thoughtful friends of the family. I have found that I can comfort my hubby and his family just as well with hugs and pics & stories of Grandma. I just have to stay in control in social situations of the snacky foods that are sitting around because of convenience. It's really hard because when I went through my last miscarriage almost 9 yrs. ago, his Grandma had a major stroke and had last rites said over her. She pulled through, but I went into a deep depression after losing my 3rd baby at 14 weeks and feeling like noone cared or aknowledged my loss. That's when I starting putting on all the weight. Losing Grandma reminds me of that time of our lives. I'm okay now. But, those feelings rush back sometimes. Just need some encouraging words and prayers from my great MFP friends. Thanks for always supporting me.

Girl... I know exactly what you mean... this brings up alllll of my unresolved grief from my 4 babies. And I'm so determined not to fall back into my bad habits that I went out and bought a ton of healthy snacks to take with us on this trip. And I'm bringing my clothes to work out. All I can imagine is a giant party - where your babies and my babies and Grandma and Grandpa and Tom and Nettie.... the list goes on... they're all together and waiting patiently for the rest of us to join them. You're so strong girl... I know I say this all the time, but you truly inspire me. Prayers are definitely comin from my house.

Pedal_Pusher

At the same time, it's a tough time your family is going through. Maybe there's a time and place for some unrestricted calories?

MommyRobin

It's going to be a tough couple of days. It's TOM and my husband's grandmother passed away Sunday. Before, I would have comforted myself and my family with food. And there's no shortage of food from thoughtful friends of the family. I have found that I can comfort my hubby and his family just as well with hugs and pics & stories of Grandma. I just have to stay in control in social situations of the snacky foods that are sitting around because of convenience. It's really hard because when I went through my last miscarriage almost 9 yrs. ago, his Grandma had a major stroke and had last rites said over her. She pulled through, but I went into a deep depression after losing my 3rd baby at 14 weeks and feeling like noone cared or aknowledged my loss. That's when I starting putting on all the weight. Losing Grandma reminds me of that time of our lives. I'm okay now. But, those feelings rush back sometimes. Just need some encouraging words and prayers from my great MFP friends. Thanks for always supporting me.

Girl... I know exactly what you mean... this brings up alllll of my unresolved grief from my 4 babies. And I'm so determined not to fall back into my bad habits that I went out and bought a ton of healthy snacks to take with us on this trip. And I'm bringing my clothes to work out. All I can imagine is a giant party - where your babies and my babies and Grandma and Grandpa and Tom and Nettie.... the list goes on... they're all together and waiting patiently for the rest of us to join them. You're so strong girl... I know I say this all the time, but you truly inspire me. Prayers are definitely comin from my house.

I'm so glad we have connected and can be there for each other. I hate that it has to be over such painful, sad circumstances, but noone should go through it alone. And it does help to know that you're not the only one. I did pretty good tonight at Linda's house tonight. I had to estimate a lot because it's mostly homemade food that people have brought by. I tried to make the healthiest choices available.Thanks for the prayers and know that you are always in ours, too.