What do you say to perfect strangers?

ShinySpork

My community is having a get together tonight. I just moved here a month ago - literally. I was really planning to attend because I'm a bit of an introvert and I need to be a little less so. I haven't even met my neighbors. Anyway, I know I need to stretch a little, socially.

But then all I could think was "What do I say to these people?" My answers were so pathetically negative they'd send my own mother running for the hills - not to mention people I just met.

Now obviously, this a self esteem thing that needs to be addressed and I'm working on that, but just so I don't have an excuse the next event, what would you say? Mind, I'm just a girl looking to be nice and social - not prowling for bad fun. :-)

luvva_luvva

Just say hi to people, say you're new to the area, and ask how much they like living there :P

juliecat1

Oh! I love your shirt. Can you tell me where you got that? I'm new here and trying to get acclimated.

Go from there. People love to talk about themselves. Sometimes just being a good listener is a good way to get started. Read up on current events and hot topics... The weather even.

Have fun with it! Try hard not to be overly negative

FireBrand80

Just wear something low-cut, the rest will take care of itself.

jadesign19

I can totally relate. I've moved soo often that this is such a pain. I too am introverted. I hope to help you. What I learned is to ask them questions about themselves. People especially men just love to talk about themselves. Listening to what they are saying is so important, you can feed off their responses. Good luck. And if all else fails talk about movies or tv. The Olympics is good with most people right now.:flowerforyou:

Fruch02

Hire a bunch of people to follow you around the event taking photos of you non stop like you are some kind of celebrity. I'm sure people will start talking to you.

christine24t

I would say the following.

"Hi, I'm _______. I live in the white house with the blue shutters, what about you?"
"Hi, I'm _______. I just moved in last month. How long have you lived in the neighborhood?"

Those are the best opening lines, and then start talking about the neighborhood. "So where did you move from?" "so you have two boys, right? I've seen them playing in your yard," etc. You could mention how long your commute is, and then that might lead into your job, and then you can ask what they do. Those are the two best questions I think you can ask.

magj0y

Come on, you know you want bad fun!!

Here it is.
Eye contact. smile. say "Hi, So glad to see how many people came out for this, my name is. what is your's?"
and reach out for a hand shake.

They will say they're name.

there will be a pause or they will start yammering on.

"Good to meet you ____.

Then you can ask one of 3 questions. What do you do. Is your family with you. how long have you lived in the area.
This will give you a good 5 minutes of nodding and saying positive things per person. Until someone asks you a question.

Go have a good time. People want to talk and be heard.. so go listen. You won't have to talk as much!

dad106

I just started going to meetup.com events.. and since I'm a bit of an introvert and can be negative, I understand where you are coming from!

Just smile, say Hi, your name and extend your hand.. and then go from there. Ask about them, their house/job/family.. if there is food being served, ask what they are eating and if they like it.. whatever pops into your head that helps you get to know them.

I was totally scared to branch out too, but now that I've done it a few more times I feel a lot more confident!

ShinySpork

I think I drastically overestimated the difficulty of the situation. :embarassed: I can certainly say hi, listen and nod.

As for bad fun and low cut shirts...well let's just say maybe and a skirt is better suited to my body type. :laugh:

Thanks! I will keep these in mind!