Is it just me? or maybe my imagination

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Replies

  • Mr_Cape219
    Mr_Cape219 Posts: 1,345 Member
    Did you consider the dismaying observation that this chamber has no windows, and no doors?
  • gemmalouise85
    gemmalouise85 Posts: 157 Member
    She might be 'slim' but you have no idea how far she's come.
    She might had started like you hae if she can go on machine that fast straight away for me I think she's worked hard to be able to do that, and others are right some people might feel embarrassed to be on a machine in middle of empty ones - even slim people have insecurities, being next to you they might not feel as looked at, also she could be looking at you hoping you say something to her.

    I'm always a fan of 'smile it confuses people' I always smile if someone stares at me and who knows where it'll lead you could come on in 6 months and some of these girls become good friends :D
  • innocenceportrayed
    innocenceportrayed Posts: 569 Member
    I wont lie, I used to do it so I could look over and see how fast the other person was going and try to keep up with them, it was a secret challenge for me. (=
  • zealousmissjj_wechange
    zealousmissjj_wechange Posts: 445
    I usually go on the tredmill/machine next to someone, because I feel that if I take the one further away I'll give the other person the feeling that I don't like them/don't want to be near them. So I socially hop on to the one next to someone. Sometimes it gives room for a nice chat between intervals.


    Maybe she's thinking the same thing and was just trying to be a nice person?


    Of course I also see your point, but sometimes we make assumptions that aren't always really true!
  • innocenceportrayed
    innocenceportrayed Posts: 569 Member
    She might be 'slim' but you have no idea how far she's come.
    She might had started like you hae if she can go on machine that fast straight away for me I think she's worked hard to be able to do that, and others are right some people might feel embarrassed to be on a machine in middle of empty ones - even slim people have insecurities, being next to you they might not feel as looked at, also she could be looking at you hoping you say something to her.

    I'm always a fan of 'smile it confuses people' I always smile if someone stares at me and who knows where it'll lead you could come on in 6 months and some of these girls become good friends :D

    Very true. I am NOT a very social person, rather an introvert(except my online time) but I almost always smile at people who I know are looking at me and if I'm feeling goofy I wave and scream "hi friend" and it really confuses them.
  • marie_cressman
    marie_cressman Posts: 980 Member
    It's probably just your imagination. For me I have 'my' treadmill at the gym which is my 'favorite' LOL. I always go for that one. Last time I was at the gym I hopped on it and started to do my thing (I ramp up to 5mph within a minute) and this very obese woman next to me started glaring at me. I snuck a peek at her treadmill and she was only going 2mph. It then dawned on me that she probably thought I was competing with her or trying to show her up or something. I wasn't!

    Just do your thing and block out other people. Trust me they are focused on their own workout.

    If it was me, sorry. I have my favorite treadmills and go for them if I can. They have my fav tvs in front of them. But I don't look at others treadmills if I can help it. I do the towel over mine so no one can see it. Maybe that would be a good idea?

    I've done the towel over thing. :) I'm a slow poke. I'd rather ramp the thing up to the max incline and walk slowly to get my sweat on than run. I feel like running is too hard on my knees. There could be a MILLION reasons she decided to hop on next to you. Many people have already explained a lot of them. The most important thing to remember is to just do what YOU are doing and don't feel bad about what they are doing even if they are sneaking peeks at you. She may very well be thinking "wow, she's doing something great for her health." I know I tend to smile when I see someone who is as over weight as I used to be working hard. I think to myself "how great that they are trying to make changes!"
  • mdcnwolf
    mdcnwolf Posts: 21 Member
    Here is another idea, although could be the truth also.

    Maybe she is trying to encourage you to do your best without saying a word. On the other hand, maybe she needs the quiet encouragment of a brave soul as your self to do HER best.

    I have had friends (skinny mini's) that would look at me ( heavy betty) and would be in awe for my bravery at tackling whatever was in my way, be it work, exercise, weight or just the world. Alot of women need someone to look to for that boost they don't get from home. Maybe you are her boost. Just smile next time and continue on your way. You are doing wonderfully and don't let anyone tell you different. Pretty soon, you will be the "skinny mini" on the treadmill. Just remember you are you and not the competition, no matter what you look like, feel or listen to.

    Have fun.
  • bacamacho
    bacamacho Posts: 306 Member
    I usually go on the tredmill/machine next to someone, because I feel that if I take the one further away I'll give the other person the feeling that I don't like them/don't want to be near them. So I socially hop on to the one next to someone. Sometimes it gives room for a nice chat between intervals.


    Maybe she's thinking the same thing and was just trying to be a nice person?


    Of course I also see your point, but sometimes we make assumptions that aren't always really true!

    Aw. That's so kind!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    because we hate that no one will go to the gym with us, because everyone says just being around them and being fit makes them feel guilty and they dont want us around, so we run next to you so we dont feel so alone, especially because in our brains, we are still carrying around the extra 100 pounds and we dont know we are arent fat anymore. We see someone working hard and we think to ourselves, oh good, she is like me, maybe i can be near her and she wont hate me.

    guess not.
  • yo_andi
    yo_andi Posts: 2,178 Member
    Next time, instead of getting all judgmental on her for allegedly getting all judgmental on you realize that she is there for the exact same reason as you are, and she is working as hard as she can, just like you are working as hard as you can. Then, smile at her, knowing that you're secretly compadres and on the same mission: to be better than you were yesterday.
  • lsilly15
    lsilly15 Posts: 137 Member
    make it a race! try to get to her speed!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    OP ruined my morning.
  • _Wits_
    _Wits_ Posts: 1,286 Member
    Ok this upsets me...

    And I'm far from my goal so it's not a case of a "skinny" girl defending "the masses"..

    But are you serious? Who the heck cares what machine someone else is on? Do you believe she sees you and says "Oh I'll try and make myself look good by the big girl"?

    THe problem here is you need to care less about her and more about you. Chances are she doesn't even know you are there. Look a little deeper instead of passing judgement on someone else...she's on her own journey and you have no idea what that is or where she has come from.

    I sure do hope you succeed with your goals...but no one is out to get you except you.

    So...to answer your question, I believe yes...it is your imagination.
  • madamepsychosis
    madamepsychosis Posts: 472 Member
    I'm far more likely to run outside than on the treadmill now, but when I do/did, I always pick the same one if it's available. Irrespective of whether someone is next to it or not. I'm short-sighted, don't work out with my glasses on and like to be able to actually see a TV to make the time go a bit quicker (one of the reasons why I quit the treadmill in the first place, I'm no longer a clock watcher now I run outside). It didn't matter whether a heavy person was next to me or not. I just liked that treadmill. We skinny *****es don't do everything with putting people down in mind, you know.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    We skinny *****es don't do everything with putting people down in mind, you know.

    I dont understand why people think that once you lose the weight, you lose your soul and turn into a hateful bully that snubs overweight people. And yet they still try to lose the weight. and the whole way there they are judging the **** out of those that succeed.
  • cddonald22
    cddonald22 Posts: 39 Member
    Maybe she was you not so long ago so she feels comfortable being beside you.
  • Wonderwoman2677
    Wonderwoman2677 Posts: 428 Member
    Put some blinders on... you are there for you... just do it! :)
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member
    I just hate it after New Years, you know how packed the gym suddenly gets as everyone starts working on their New Year's resolutions. Then, you can't get a machine. Usually stays that way until February or March, then they all start dropping off and the machines are available again.

    I had to laugh, this is SOOO true.
    I remember this past new years when I actually wasn't a newbie anymore, I was like 'I really want everyone to succeed at their goals, but if they could do it at another time of day' or whatever.. totally kidding of course but we couldn't get a machine to save our lives. Of course now it's dead again!!!
  • frando
    frando Posts: 583 Member
    Our gym's skinny people hang out in the juice bar in front of the gym entrance, then wear gym clothes yet I've never seen them break sweat o_O
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
    In dance or yoga class I try to get up front, so that I can see the instructor without needing to wear my glasses (and having my glasses falling off my face when I am having proper alignment during inverted poses).

    And if anyone thinks I am looking at them, it's to check the pose for my own information (if they are close), if they are far away I can't see them, so I don't know I am looking at them.

    I don't run because of knee problems.

    Sometimes I look at people (and smile) because I feel like I am being rude and ignoring their presence if I don't.

    But, I haven't had any problems at the gym. It's my happy place, and I love to see everyone there.
  • DrBorkBork
    DrBorkBork Posts: 4,099 Member
    I'd just smirk at said skinny chic and crank up my TM for a little race. Pretty sure I can outsprint just about anyone. Nobody expects fat momma to do much. Let's see how long that girl can last on 10 mph the next time you see her.
  • conniehv40
    conniehv40 Posts: 442 Member
    Kind of weird? Yes?

    It is funny because my husband goes to the gym (his work hours never allow him to be outside when the sun is still out). Anyway, a few weeks ago he told me something very similar--Empty gym and guy comes up RIGHT next to him and changed the channel of the tv my husband was watching?

    Who does stuff like this? I'd be on the opposite side of the gym-just sayin'
  • emily356
    emily356 Posts: 318 Member
    I completely agree with the poster that said to smile and give a word of encouragement to her. Will totally break that feeling!!;) Also, to the person who talked about people with long hair running with it down... I have migraines and a million things that will trigger them. One is wearing my hair in a ponytail. Sometimes I do two pigtails, which is better, but sometimes, I just leave it all down... blowing in the wind. We are all too judgy...
  • madamepsychosis
    madamepsychosis Posts: 472 Member
    We skinny *****es don't do everything with putting people down in mind, you know.

    I dont understand why people think that once you lose the weight, you lose your soul and turn into a hateful bully that snubs overweight people. And yet they still try to lose the weight. and the whole way there they are judging the **** out of those that succeed.

    Right?! I'm happy when I see overweight people making positive changes to their lifestyle. I've been there and I know it's hard work, but ultimately beneficial, hence why I'm still doing it! Yet apparently people see me as I am now and assume I'm doing the exact same things they are, not because I want to be healthy and happy, but to one-up overweight people and make them feel bad about themselves. As well as being offensive, that's kind of narcissistic. I do these things for me, not the OP or anyone else who assumes I'm trying to compete with them. In fact, I'm just going to leave a quote from my favourite writer here, because I think it's relevant:
    'You'll worry less about what people think about you when you realise how seldom they do.' - David Foster Wallace
  • thrld
    thrld Posts: 610 Member
    it's as if some one got onthe tread and said hah-I am THIN and you aere NOT,
    and I HATE IT. Totally RUINS my attempts at a lively and fun workout. Same thing in dance classs--it seems to me there are always girls who are mad to compete and position themselves for that---whether it's an actual competition or not
    Could you be projecting your fear/resentment onto these women? Perhaps their motivations have nothing to do with you? Could it be that they are not trying to make you feel anything, much less compete with you? And what if that girl is a MFP member who has made the same commitment as you, has taken the same journey? But even if you are correct, that these ladies are trying to compete with you, ask yourself, "What are we competing for?" What is the prize? And who really cares who the winner is, much less who gets the silver or bronze?"
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I'd just smirk at said skinny chic and crank up my TM for a little race. Pretty sure I can outsprint just about anyone. Nobody expects fat momma to do much. Let's see how long that girl can last on 10 mph the next time you see her.

    cause obvs she is your enemy now.

    based on her weight.
  • wildcata77
    wildcata77 Posts: 660
    THe problem here is you need to care less about her and more about you.

    This...I'm with wits and yoovie.

    I get it, when you are fat it's really hard not to judge skinny *****es, as we lovingly refer to them. But trust me, we all experience the same ups and down no matter what size we are. And as yoovie pointed out: how will you feel once you reach your goal if pepole judge you to be a snob?
  • heroyalslimness
    heroyalslimness Posts: 591 Member
    Thanks again for the responses---some of them CRACKED ME UP:laugh:

    LISTEN--This is no indictment on slender females who happen (by the way, COMPLETELY turned off by that term skinny b) to select the empty tread next to me and dart off into a full run while I am mindlessly plodding along on 2.5---

    I defend their right to do it---even while I am grumbling that it's annoying as heck.

    I am glad I am not alone in these feelings--I thought no one must feel this way--but me. It's nice to know others have faced the same challenge.

    Clearly no one read my second answer that said---I accept
    the problem, challenge and solution is--me!
    I have not worked out in ages----and going to the public gym is a courageous act for me. And sure--I've got insecurities. Don't you? Isn't that why you are here? To get support around it--like me? Stuff is going to come up as I work restoring my body.
    I'll get triggered by things some of you won't even notice--you'll get triggered by things I would not even blink at. Some of us will right away identify ---others will be unable whatsoever to relate.

    <<shrug>>>

    But airing the *feelings*--is a good thing--I'm glad I did---how else are you empowered to change?

    Air it--share it or wear it---

    Not wanting some one right next to me ---especially pounding into a full run on the first step after she's laced up her sneakers--
    does not mean I do not get a lot of working out in a community---

    But a scenario like that --while I am newly back to the gym--just beginning to confront body image--and denial----<right now>--it breaks my concentration and negatively affects my work-out.---

    Will it six months from now? Probably not. Today-- I do not have to judge my reactions--then or now.
    All I have to do is today
    is make logistical adjustments--to keep the focus on my own fitness track --so I will!

    Then I can have an awesome workout and respect someone else's.

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