Losing while losing?

sarahbuckk

I was just thinking; being all philisophical & whatnot, and I wonder if anyone else ever feels like they're losing themselves while they're on the weight-loss journey? I mean I realize it sounds kind of silly at a glance.. but if you think about it, you're losing weight, changing (just about) everything reguarding your lifestyle, you're opening up the doors and windows of opportunity reguarding clothes you can now wear, things you can now do, and more human personal interaction than ever before. It's kind of like a clean new slate, and honestly, I find it to be a little intimidating, if not completely overwhelming at times. I feel like I'm losing me too, and having/getting to start all over again. While on the one hand, that's pretty great. But on the other hand, will my entire life up to this point cease to matter, nay BE in this new me I'm making? This may just be a bunch of nonsense to some people.. or everyone.. lol but I think you can comprehend the general idea...

Do you think you lose the current you while you're losing the weight?

Also, feel free to tell me anythig that this brings to mind, even if it's that I'm nuts lol

orthetiger

Interesting question, but no.
I actually really hate when people refer to themselves as a "new person" or as having a "new body." It is ridiculous. You are the same person and you have the same body.
Maybe because I've struggled with eating disorders my entire adult life and my weight has been up and down and up again, I realize that when my weight changes, I still have the same anxieties and insecurities. I am the same person.

Regardless, though, people change. Weight loss is not the only way that people change. When you lose weight, gain weight, start and end relationships and friendships, move, go to school, start a new job... all of these things add to your experience as a person and you change. But you aren't losing anything. You are the same person as before but with no experiences. The idea that you split or leave a self behind is inaccurate, and I wish people would stop thinking like that.

WickedPixie1

Not necessarily losing themselves, but maybe losing the negative side, negative aspects of themselves.
For me, it's a complete 360. I'm better educated about this process now than I was a few years ago, my focus is more accurate, my determination more intense.
That makes me a new person in the sense that I would never have recognised the person I am now had I met myself a few years ago, I never would have thought that 'this me' was possible. Yes, I am still the person I was, what I have lived and experienced will never change, but I see a distinctly different future for myself.
Losing weight is only a small part of this. It's a change in mind-set, outlook, goals, health, self worth, confidence, mood, fitness, relationships, beliefs, education, spirituality, happiness and also how you deal with problems, stress, anger, fear.
Without change, without becoming a 'new person' with a 'new body' I'd still be miserable, overweight, depressed, lacking motivation and my self esteem and confidence would still be rock bottom.
It's not an inaccurate statement, it's a personal opinion, and those opinions differ greatly for everyone. Having never suffered from an eating disorder, I can't begin to understand the anxieties, fears and insecurities one goes through in dealing with it, but having known a person or two who has suffered, I know it is an ongoing battle, even when you are healthy.
Humans are a constantly changing and evolving species. If someone makes great changes in their lives that changes the way they think and see the world around them, I think they are justified to call themselves a new person.

lilpoindexter

Hell no. I am, and will be, the same person, just with better eating and exercise habits....and without knees that snap and pop from all the excess fat.

Arexxx

No. I'm still the same old me. I just don't eat crap, and my body looks better.

sarahbuckk

I don't necessarily mean that just because you're losing weight.. i mean like since there's so many new things happening, ditching old, toxic habits, etc etc is it possible to lose sight of who you 'used to be' Or maybe, for me, this isnt weight related at all.. well, not directly anyway, because I'm noticing my tastes in clothes/music/people/whatever changing/evolving and adding weightloss to the list, i guess i just feel like everything I've ever been is being left behind in a sense.. if that makes any kind of sense...because I've always been like the 'fat, edgy, lone-wolf' type person, and i feel like i'm getting farther and farther away from that.. like everything I've ever known is being left behind, not just due to weightloss, of course, and I'm starting the next/new chapter of myself. I don't know.. lol this is probably a bunch of nonsense that isn't making any sense to anyone at all..... lol but I promise it makes sense in my head! lol

nene01pop

Totally UNDERSTAND... was told the other day by my mom that I was getting PRISSER AND PRISSER every pound I lose... I have caught myself getting all dolled up alot more often than before... earrings, make up, hair... oh yea, I totally get it!

tammyc226

Nope. I've felt like a skinny girl trapped in a fat girls body for years. I still have a long way to go, but my body is heading in the direction of the skinny girl. Lol

sarahbuckk

Awesome reponses, guys. So (for the most part) it looks like I'm just at an overall changing point in my life. Interesting

kittyconni

I have found that I am more outgoing, I have more self-confidence and like to get "dressed-up" more often now! I am happy to say goodbye to the "old me". The old me would have never went out in shorts and just melt in the 119 degree Louisiana heat. The other day, I actually wore a mini-skirt and tank top! I am loving the new me!

Lmezz11

Interesting topic, but I would have to say no. I think you will always know who you "used to be" because that is part of who you are. It affects the decisions you make, how you interact with others, etc. There are parts of your life that will change, yes. But isn't that with everything you do? Every decision you make? Its all a growing experience. You learn new things everyday that change how you look at the world. Now I feel like I am babbling so I will end with this. You will change, yes, but I don't think you lose who you truly are.

samhigh

Do you think you lose the current you while you're losing the weight?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtNHuqHWefU

RealMattHopkins

I noticed that you're 20 years old and I personally had somewhat of a life remodel at age 20. You're out of your teens, you're realizing your adult self, and you're letting go of the constraints that came with the pressure of being a teenager. This is going to be an amazing time in your life because what you are doing right now is discovering the TRUE you. You know why you're the type of person who will be successful? You are the type of person who isn't afraid to look deep in themselves in an effort to be true to themselves. I wish I was where you are at 20. You're on the right track!

sarahbuckk

I noticed that you're 20 years old and I personally had somewhat of a life remodel at age 20. You're out of your teens, you're realizing your adult self, and you're letting go of the constraints that came with the pressure of being a teenager. This is going to be an amazing time in your life because what you are doing right now is discovering the TRUE you. You know why you're the type of person who will be successful? You are the type of person who isn't afraid to look deep in themselves in an effort to be true to themselves. I wish I was where you are at 20. You're on the right track!

*virtual high-five*

cgale8

I understand where your coming from. But I don't think it's losing you, I think its gaining more of you. We all have the insecure areas that most people walking around have layers that help them to cope. I feel as you lose weight you are gaining the layers that the weight stripped away. You are still you just more multi faceted!

Of course many people will associate your "new" with the weight loss but what they fail to understand is that your "new" was always there but they only saw the weight. It reminds me of when I earned my master's degree, everyone treats me as if I am instantly more intelligent and am referred to more often. The funny part is that my degree did nothing more than give me credentials, I always had the knowledge!!

Energyflows

I noticed that you're 20 years old and I personally had somewhat of a life remodel at age 20. You're out of your teens, you're realizing your adult self, and you're letting go of the constraints that came with the pressure of being a teenager. This is going to be an amazing time in your life because what you are doing right now is discovering the TRUE you. You know why you're the type of person who will be successful? You are the type of person who isn't afraid to look deep in themselves in an effort to be true to themselves. I wish I was where you are at 20. You're on the right track!

I have the same thought. Now I'm 23 (female) but when I was 18-19 I asked myself everyday 'is it really you in there?' and by my 20s I really had a different view on myself and the world. All for the best of course because it is a journey to love yourself.

I think you are doing amazing because you are looking beyond the obvious and asking yourself those questions!
Hope you'll be able to embrace the fantastic person you are, was and (hopefully ;-) ) always will be!

BethMSutton

I was really overweight all right up until my early 20s & have been up & down until the last couple of years. Right now I'm yo-yoing around just above my ideal weight but I've been in the 'happy zone' for about 5 years.

And yes, along the way I DID lose parts of myself - but they were parts that I was happy to lose!! The girl that felt awkward wedging herself into the middle of other people on a train seat has been replaced by the girl who gets away with forgetting to renew her train ticket with a wink & smile at the ticket collector. The girl who was terrified of ever letting the guard down (& therefore being a target) has been replaced by the girl who celebrates her own quirks along with everyone else's - because when she stopped worrying about her own flaws so much, she realised that noone else was so very perfect either.

You won't lose parts of yourself that you don't want to lose. You'll simply find that you're able to make a choice now about the parts that you want to keep & the crappy bits that can be tossed out.

xxxxx

sarahbuckk

I was really overweight all right up until my early 20s & have been up & down until the last couple of years. Right now I'm yo-yoing around just above my ideal weight but I've been in the 'happy zone' for about 5 years.

And yes, along the way I DID lose parts of myself - but they were parts that I was happy to lose!! The girl that felt awkward wedging herself into the middle of other people on a train seat has been replaced by the girl who gets away with forgetting to renew her train ticket with a wink & smile at the ticket collector. The girl who was terrified of ever letting the guard down (& therefore being a target) has been replaced by the girl who celebrates her own quirks along with everyone else's - because when she stopped worrying about her own flaws so much, she realised that noone else was so very perfect either.

You won't lose parts of yourself that you don't want to lose. You'll simply find that you're able to make a choice now about the parts that you want to keep & the crappy bits that can be tossed out.

xxxxx

That's awesome. And I've just been thinking for a while about everything I used to like, and now I don't do those things, or see those people, or whatever. I actually kinda miss those things sometimes, and I always vowed I'd never change.. but nowadays I still love those people, but we no longer share that connection, those things we did together now don't really even seem interesting, I miss the way I used to dress, but now i feel like I look ridiculous when I do. Maybe I've just become awake and aware of the fact that I'm 'evolving' as a person. I don't know.. lol I really feel like I've lost touch with everything I used to be.. all my familiars, and now this new me is like.. kind of unfamiliar and different (as compared to the prior)

Meh, I don't know.. lol this makes less sense the more i go on about it... lol

sarahbuckk

I understand where your coming from. But I don't think it's losing you, I think its gaining more of you. We all have the insecure areas that most people walking around have layers that help them to cope. I feel as you lose weight you are gaining the layers that the weight stripped away. You are still you just more multi faceted!

Of course many people will associate your "new" with the weight loss but what they fail to understand is that your "new" was always there but they only saw the weight. It reminds me of when I earned my master's degree, everyone treats me as if I am instantly more intelligent and am referred to more often. The funny part is that my degree did nothing more than give me credentials, I always had the knowledge!!

Also very awesome.