Help? Not in "not eating", but just the opposite.

papate

Hello Fitness Pals, well I hope to find a pal or a friend out there.
Long story short, I am an ex-anorexic, obviously recovered from that and ballooned to a whale, but when I started this "diet" which I call a life style change, I am seeing myself fall deeper and deeper back into the same old routine. That was 20 years ago, don't think it would be too good on my body and health at this age,

But I have been going on 600 or less calories a day for 2 months now, I have lost 31 pounds, I have never felt better, I have more energy than ever, I have had no bad side effects, no hair loss, no passing out, no headaches, palpitations, etc etc.
I have heard all the common sense theories for a higher daily calorie goal, but my mind just won't let me do it.
I did go in and change my goals to 900 a day but at the same time I ended up increasing the exercise.
I thought if I slowly raised the intake, I wouldn't rapidly gain it back and I would feel a noticable difference in the way I feel.
At some point I going to have to eat, to maintain, or --- well, we all know what the "OR" would mean.

I guess what I'm saying, I know I have to change, but I can't wrap my mind around it when things are going so good now, at least to me they are, I can't see what's happening inside me. I am 58 year old female, 5'4", have lost 31 and want to get off at least 40-50 more and not over 2 years.

Anyone out there who can change my mind set and give it a huge wake-up call? Before I get yelled at, and please don't do that, I am not promoting an unhealthy way of eating, I am not supporting anorexics, I have empathy for them, because, other than the actual scale weight, I'm there, I am almost to the point of not allowing myself to eat, I count every calorie, I exercise as much as time allows and I do admit that I abuse certain "over the counter products".
Is there hope for me?
Thank you

geezer99

I don't have nearly as much history to overcome as you do, but I do tend to get too few calories especially when exercising. What has helped me is to add calories in ways that I never did before (candy and chips in the old days.) Now I use cottage cheese, nuts, and fruits (including dried fruits) This seems to let me add about 500 calories a day without triggering that "fatso!" sensor that lives inside my brain.

wilmnoca

Doing it the right way will give you life long health and acceptance of your body, repeating the same cycle will keep you in misery.