weights at the gym...Im scurred :(
jibbala
Posts: 76 Member
How did you ladies overcome the intimidation that comes from lifting at the gym? There are women who lift at my gym...they are the fitness model very buff kind. Ive never had a good experience using free weights at a gym. At our previous gym someone actually laughed when I grabbed some lighter weights and made a rude comment about my ability. I know its stupid but I am so intimidated to try it again. I was very heavy when this happened and had worked up so much courage to try something new. Everyone is so strong and knows what they are doing at our current gym. Lots of young douchey gym dudes who like to flex in the mirror and scream when they lift and oogle the ladies. I do the machines...but I hate the machines and know I'm not getting the same benefit.
Basically...I need some serious confidence.
Basically...I need some serious confidence.
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Replies
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I hired a personal trainer to work with me in the weights section once a week. That gave me the confidence that what I was doing was right, and to grab weights of the correct weight for me. It also taught me good form.0
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I was very intimidated. I had to gather my courage and walk in. I was sure they would stare at the fat girl trying to use their weights. Truethfully its not their weights we need to remember that. Luckily no one said anything to me. Maybe because i go to the Y. They get all kinds of people there. I know I looked silly but I tried. I am hopeful next time will be easier. Have you tried going at different times? Not sure what your schedule is.0
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I'm in the same situation as you. I go to an Air Force base gym and let's just say I'm not the best looking one there. All the guys are lifting 90 pound dumbbells while I can barely do a dumbbell bench press with 10 pound weights! I feel like a failure. Do you know the exercises you want to do? If not, I highly suggest looking up bodybuilding.com. I know a few other girls that have used this website. They love it and have seen amazing results.
I also agree that you should get a personal trainer. It doesn't have to be every day that you work out. Just plan a couple sessions so you get the gist of how you should be performing the exercises and specific exercises that you should do.0 -
There aren't personal trainers at my gym (I know, right?) to guide me and the free weights area is very intimidating. So, I use the cardio machines and spin at the gym and then I go home and use my free (literally! ha!!) weights and bench. Lame, yes, but I'm working up the nerve.
You'll get there. It takes just that one moment of courage to take the bull by the horns, then you'll be asking yourself why you didn't sooner. Good luck!0 -
Everybody looks like an idiot the first time. Even those huge beasts wandering around the gym. They had to start somewhere. Suck it up.0
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During the week I'm stuck going after work...even going later the place is packed. Sunday isn't too bad and hubs comes with me and that helps. He isn't always able to come with me after work though. There is only 1 gym within 15 miles of my house so everyone goes there and its busy even middle of week on a Tuesday.
The last time I sucked it up I was humiliated so just walking in like I own the place is not something I'm ready for. I'm not totally bee to weights and do have an idea of what I'm doing.0 -
Personally, I would find a different gym!0
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Educate yourself first- get a copy of New Rules of Lifting for Women or Starting Strength, read it, watch some videos on you tube. If you only do that, you'll be more knowledgeable than 75% of the people there.
Then, if you still feel unsure of yourself, hire a trainer for a session or two- they'll walk you through it.
Once you have an idea of what you want to do, put on a pair of headphones, hold your head high, and just do it. You'll soon find people are way too in to their own workout to spend too much time paying attention to others. Just remember, those buff chicks were beginners once too!0 -
You are in the gym for you, having a personal trainer even for a short period of time will give you confidence in your form and ability. Anyone who goes to a gym regularly will recognize your effort and commitment to improve your health. The "lookie lou's" never last long in a gym, you will earn respect by making an effort asking for assistance, and being there routinely. Stick with it, my first entrance into a gym I weighed 354 pounds, but now when I leg press 450 pounds and grunt (sort of porn sounding) I get respect:) Stick with it:) cause "a girls gotta grunt!"0
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I'm so glad I'm not the only one! I feel completely out of my element! Even though I know that those beefy guys aren't really looking at me and thinking, "What is she DOING? That's not right!", I feel completely self-conscious. I met with a trainer only once. I felt great using the weights and machines while she was right there guiding me, but on my own... I just haven't gotten comfortable.
I attempted to look like I knew what I was doing by typing all the trainer's notes in my phone. I thought I was pretty clever... pretending to change the song on Pandora when I was really looking at my notes to see what the heck I'm supposed to do. Great plan- until I accidentally deleted it while I was setting up my first machine!
So, for now, I'm doing free weights at home and I found a class that I love that uses weights. I don't know if I will ever get the nerve to head back to the weight room, but I think my current routine is working well for me, so I'm OK with that.0 -
I was scared too. Then I walked in, put on my I-Know-What-I'm-Doing-****-Off face, and picked up some heavy things.
I'm still very much a beginner, but I act confident and no one bothers me. The more you do it (and the more you educate yourself about it), the more your confidence and actual knowledge grows. There's a solid chance someone WILL at some point be unpleasant to you. It's happened to me. But who cares? Everyone has to start somewhere. Even the biggest guy started from square one, and if he's going to make fun of you for doing the same than he's a *kitten* anyways.
Good luck!0 -
Do a personal training session or two, and learn how to use free weights if you want to. You will still be getting benefits from the machines so try not to be too hard on yourself! I think it is the same at every gym with the people who will judge, but you have to remind yourself that you are making a positive and difficult change to your life and your health for your future. Once I knew what I was doing with the weights it made it a lot easier, but I find that I also get good benefits from using the fixed weight machines. It really is just about what works for you
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Well as a fat lady trying to lose weight I was terrified of the gym. I just threw myself in it and realized that no one really cares what i am doing and if they do, I don't care!!
As far as weights go, I just threw myself into those as well. I am doing 3 sets of 10 until I can build myself up to more. Just take a deep breath and be brave.......you deserve this and don't let anyone or anything stop you
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Thanks for the support ladies. I have no issues doing other new things...bikram yoga...body conditioning...bootcamp classes. In fact I went to a new class tonight! The weights freak me out though. Im going to look into cost for a few training sessions and that weight lifting book and see where I can go. I gotta blast away my jiggle!0
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As a guy, I can tell you the only reason it seems like we're looking around is because we're stalling before the next set. There is most likely no thoughts going threw our mind besides "****, my arms are rubber right now." Just do your thing, you're not being judged. Trust me.0
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Go there and overcome your fear and if someone stares or says something just look at him/her smile, walk there and ask ... you look like you know how this works, would you please have a look if I do this right ? I am sure they will help and understand that you are trying.0
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Also- you can always ask someone. I'm in the very small minority being a woman that lifts heavy at my gym, and from time to time I see girls watching me, looking interested in what I'm doing. I kind of wish they would come ask me! I'm not going to go up to someone watching me and be like "Hey- Want me to show you how to do this???" because it would be weird and aggressive. But I would be happy to help anyone who asked!0
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LOL I'm scared too
I go to a Navy gym and have stayed in the pool mostly but am thinking I want to try weightlifting a bit. I haven't done it since high school though. They do have female trainers but the idea of working out in a fully mirrored room with a packe d house of Navy guys is SCARY. I hear ya! I will get up the courage. Took me two months to make it into the pool 0 -
First thing is to do as much out of gym research as you can. Forums like this one and body building ones can be extremely beneficial and you can lurk over the topics you're interested in as well as ask questions if needed, YouTube is another good source that has a lot of instructional videos, and are of course there are million websites. Second, go to the gym, get on a bike or treadmill or just walk around paying attention to the weight lifters and just learn by watching them, and finally, bite the bullet and give it a shot. If you feel uncomfortable about doing something or your form or whatever, then ask someone for advice or for a spot. Generally, you can find a decent person or two that would just be thrilled you're there doing something. Also, asking an employee wouldn't be a bad idea.
The thing to remember is, you're doing this so that you can get healthier and with that comes confidence. You're not going to be perfect at first, but you have to start somewhere...just like everyone else did. It's about you, and what you're doing to make the changes in your life. You've already shown that you've decided to be dedicated to get in the best shape you can just by joining this site and asking this question. You WANT to learn, you WANT to succeed, and that's all you need to succeed.
The best way to get over a fear is take that one step further than last time. You got this. Remember, you are already awesome because you've already made the choice to be the best you can be...everything else doesn't matter.0 -
First thing is to do as much out of gym research as you can. Forums like this one and body building ones can be extremely beneficial and you can lurk over the topics you're interested in as well as ask questions if needed, YouTube is another good source that has a lot of instructional videos, and are of course there are million websites. Second, go to the gym, get on a bike or treadmill or just walk around paying attention to the weight lifters and just learn by watching them, and finally, bite the bullet and give it a shot. If you feel uncomfortable about doing something or your form or whatever, then ask someone for advice or for a spot. Generally, you can find a decent person or two that would just be thrilled you're there doing something. Also, asking an employee wouldn't be a bad idea.
The thing to remember is, you're doing this so that you can get healthier and with that comes confidence. You're not going to be perfect at first, but you have to start somewhere...just like everyone else did. It's about you, and what you're doing to make the changes in your life. You've already shown that you've decided to be dedicated to get in the best shape you can just by joining this site and asking this question. You WANT to learn, you WANT to succeed, and that's all you need to succeed.
The best way to get over a fear is take that one step further than last time. You got this. Remember, you are already awesome because you've already made the choice to be the best you can be...everything else doesn't matter.
very sound advice! thank you!0 -
Get a trainer, even if it's just for a session or 2 to get you in there and comfortable. And make sure they actually take you IN the weight room. Problem solved.0
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When do you go? I find that at my gym at 5:30 AM (my normal time) there are less people there, and the ones who are there are friendly and serious about succeeding. They're not there to show off. Before I started lifting in January, I watched videos on bodybuilding.com so I could make sure I was lifting correctly. I would even pull up videos on my phone before I did exercises I wasn't 100% sure about. This helped tremendously! A couple of times I was stuck and seriously didn't know wtf to do, so I gathered my courage and asked one of the guys. Luckily they were nice and gave me some pointers! Now I couldn't feel more at home at my gym. It's my happy place each morning 0
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1. Youtube is your friend. Figure out your routine and what you'll be doing. Write it down or program it into your smartphone if you have one. Watch videos to see how the moves are done so you don't hurt yourself.
2. Don't try to impress anyone. Honestly, they're not worth it. Focus on you and what you're doing. What they're doing doesn't matter.
3. If you're really worried about comments, listen to music. Listen to it loudly so you don't hear the jackwipes.0 -
Don't be scurred. Look at the link below. Buy and read the SS book. My old lady read SS and Monday night walked into the gym for the first time and started doing barbell back squats with good form with very little direction from me (basically just cues). Wednesday she was deadlifting 115 for a set of 5.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/686963-large-collection-of-info-for-beginners0 -
I have the same problem, and I was on the weightlifting team in high school! So I know what I'm supposed to be doing. I've always been shy. And the thought of trying to lift as out of shape as I am now, keeps me away from the weights. I think the personal trainer is a great idea if you can afford it. I'm starting to work out at home, in the hopes that when I'm in a little better shape, I'll be able to muster up the courage to lift at the gym.
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I'd also like to say that a lot of those big guys can be very friendly and are willing to answer a question or two about exercises. I got started in weight lifting when I was 15 and this guy just started talking to me about my goals for weight loss and offered to teach me (Not in a creepy way. My uncle went to the same gym and new him). I was his weight lifting partner for 2 years every day after school. Now this is not typical, but there were a lot of men at my gym when i first started willing to offer advice and help0
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I stay away from "the other side" for the same reason.
I'm not going to recommend a personal trainer because not everyone can afford one....even for "a couple sessions". I agree with the poster that said to educate yourself. Just go online ma, do some research and hopefully that will help. Good luck! 0 -
Find a good recommended weightlifting routine online. Look up videos on youtube for proper form. That's what I did
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As a guy, I can tell you the only reason it seems like we're looking around is because we're stalling before the next set. There is most likely no thoughts going threw our mind besides "****, my arms are rubber right now." Just do your thing, you're not being judged. Trust me.
^^^ This. Don't be intimidated for no reason. I just did my second set of 6 chin ups and lifting 215 pounds off the ground ain't easy. I'm just standing in this odd location doing nothing because:
A. It's right under a ceiling fan and I'm hot.
B. My biceps are calling 911
C. I'm waiting for my pulse to drop back down under 140
D. I'm not sure I can finish this set listening to this specific song. I think I'll switch to a different song. Yep, tired of this song.
E. Hmmm, let me hit that water bottle again.
F. Should I do cable press down or dips next? Last week the dips were a bit too easy.... yeah, better do them last when my arms are the weakest.
G. Did I take a protein shake this morning? Can't remember. Need to double check my food diary when I'm done.
H. It's raining outside. Need to turn off the sprinkler so it doesn't come on tonight.
The last thing on my mind is "O gee, I wonder if there are any newbs using weights that I can mock quietly and feel superior to?" Everyone that has bigger muscles than you isn't automatically a douche or a curl-monkey. You're making all that up in your mind. No, I don't smile or acknowledge you right away if you walk to the weights. I assume you're there to workout, and that you'll scream "rape" and pull out the pepper spray if I so much as glance at you.
Just jump in and do your thing. I probably won't even notice you're there other than to think "Soon as she's done in that area I need grab some dumbbells."0 -
My first personal trainer who put me on the weights was a competitive body builder so... She took me over there and encouraged me a bunch and it became easy.
I think having a personal trainer who will put you on the free weights is an important step and I'd recommend a personal trainer for anyone who has never done weights before. You can think you are doing the form right but then you get in there and someone watching you can help you realize that you aren't 0
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