The Vanilla Caramel Drumstick and the Red Minus 317
TheFinalThird
Posts: 315 Member
I knew it was going to be a tough eating day. Any work day that starts with me getting up at 3:00 a.m., and working furiously on a deadline project from 4:30 a.m. to 3:00 p.m. is going to be a tough eating day. The project excellently completed and delivered, I headed home for dinner. By the time I finished eating, I was 7 calories over for the day. A BIG FAT Red Minus 7. Even though the computer was in one room, and I was in the living room in my recliner, I could "see" that Big Fat Red Minus 7 glowing on the computer screen like The Scarlet Number. It hung on that computer screen, mocking me, shaming me, demonstrating to me the lack of willpower that got me to 478 pounds in the first place. I knew this was my Alamo... my Waterloo... my Cuban Missile Crisis. If I let that Big Red Minus 7 beat me, I would certainly eat the 20 pounds that I'd lost right back in a matter of days. My failure and hopelessness would be confirmed.
To make matters worse, SHE was calling me from the freezer. SHE was a Nestle's Vanilla Caramel Cookie Dipped Drumstick Ice Cream Cone. Oh yeah, that's the stuff.... the REALLY GOOD STUFF. A crisp, thick shell of sweet dark chocolate on the outside, a crunchy sugar cone beneath, and cold, creamy vanilla ice cream with a gooey, sticky golden brown caramel surprise in the middle. Oh yeah. There's my heroin. My methamphetamine. My crack. My Brooklyn Decker. And in that second, the Big Red MInus 7 stopped glowing entirely. It was totally extinguished by HER. All I could see was that sweet chocolate coating, that creamy cold ice cream, the crisp sugar cone shell, and that oh so special plug of chocolate coating the bottom of the cone. I'm sure that I must have enjoyed Her, because one moment, I was disrobing Her, and the next moment, her "robe" was laying in a heap on the top of the wastepaper basket. I sat back on the couch with that same stupid grin that Winnie the Pooh gets after dipping way down deep in the honey pot with a belly full of sweet sticky happiness.
And then it happened. Instead of the Big Red Minus 7, I realized SHE and I had turned it into The Big Red Minus 317. Oh crap. This is bad. This is really bad. REALLY, REALLY BAD. I knew there was only one way out of this. I walked to the bedroom for a change of underwear (yeah, it's hard for a 458 pound guy to FIND underwear but it's out there), gym shorts, fresh socks and my walking shoes. I laced up my shoes (something that, by the way, had been much harder to do 20 pounds ago), and reached for my iPod. Crap. The battery was below 20%. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I grabbed my phone and headphones, realizing that I could listen to music on the phone. Crap. Battery down to 32%. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I turned on the music and, Crap... the earphones that fit in the phone were crackly and crappy. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I opened the front door and walked out. The Houston, Texas, heat and humidity hung in a particularly oppressive manner this evening. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway.
About four blocks into the walk, I realized that instead of my light, summer, underarmor shirt, I grabbed a thick 100% cotton heavy t-shirt. However warm and humid it was walking in the right shirt, this shirt make it feel five times worse. Surely this was a sign that I shouldn't walk. But I did anyway.
Around the half way mark of my walk, a song came on the phone. It was from the album, "Hit Man, David Foster." It was Charice singing a medley of the songs "I Have Nothing" and "I Will Always Love You" made famous by Whitney Houston. I thought to myself how beautiful those songs are, and how sad it was that Whitney Houston lost her battle with the demons that drove her to her death. And suddenly I was thunderstruck. I realized that up until the past month, I had been doing the same thing with my weight and food. And if I didn't win the battle, I would end up the same way as Whitney... VERY SOON.
I don't remember much about the last mile of walking except for two things. First, the heavy cotton t-shirt that I knew was a mistake weighed about 5x more than it did when I started walking from all the sweat. Second, there was no way I wasn't going to finish those two miles.
Well, I did. And though you will never read about it in the newspaper and I won't be named Time Man of the Year, I did it. I won my version of the Alamo. I won my version of Waterloo. I won my version of the Cuban Missile Crisis. In 36 minutes of brisk walking, I turned that Red Minus 317 into a Big Green Happy 94. Hurray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here's to all of you winning YOUR personal Alamos, Waterloos and Cuban Missile Crises. As for me, I am going to rehydrate and drag my stinky self into a nice cool shower. Have a wonderful evening wherever you are!
To make matters worse, SHE was calling me from the freezer. SHE was a Nestle's Vanilla Caramel Cookie Dipped Drumstick Ice Cream Cone. Oh yeah, that's the stuff.... the REALLY GOOD STUFF. A crisp, thick shell of sweet dark chocolate on the outside, a crunchy sugar cone beneath, and cold, creamy vanilla ice cream with a gooey, sticky golden brown caramel surprise in the middle. Oh yeah. There's my heroin. My methamphetamine. My crack. My Brooklyn Decker. And in that second, the Big Red MInus 7 stopped glowing entirely. It was totally extinguished by HER. All I could see was that sweet chocolate coating, that creamy cold ice cream, the crisp sugar cone shell, and that oh so special plug of chocolate coating the bottom of the cone. I'm sure that I must have enjoyed Her, because one moment, I was disrobing Her, and the next moment, her "robe" was laying in a heap on the top of the wastepaper basket. I sat back on the couch with that same stupid grin that Winnie the Pooh gets after dipping way down deep in the honey pot with a belly full of sweet sticky happiness.
And then it happened. Instead of the Big Red Minus 7, I realized SHE and I had turned it into The Big Red Minus 317. Oh crap. This is bad. This is really bad. REALLY, REALLY BAD. I knew there was only one way out of this. I walked to the bedroom for a change of underwear (yeah, it's hard for a 458 pound guy to FIND underwear but it's out there), gym shorts, fresh socks and my walking shoes. I laced up my shoes (something that, by the way, had been much harder to do 20 pounds ago), and reached for my iPod. Crap. The battery was below 20%. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I grabbed my phone and headphones, realizing that I could listen to music on the phone. Crap. Battery down to 32%. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I turned on the music and, Crap... the earphones that fit in the phone were crackly and crappy. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway. I opened the front door and walked out. The Houston, Texas, heat and humidity hung in a particularly oppressive manner this evening. Surely this was a sign that I should not walk. But I did anyway.
About four blocks into the walk, I realized that instead of my light, summer, underarmor shirt, I grabbed a thick 100% cotton heavy t-shirt. However warm and humid it was walking in the right shirt, this shirt make it feel five times worse. Surely this was a sign that I shouldn't walk. But I did anyway.
Around the half way mark of my walk, a song came on the phone. It was from the album, "Hit Man, David Foster." It was Charice singing a medley of the songs "I Have Nothing" and "I Will Always Love You" made famous by Whitney Houston. I thought to myself how beautiful those songs are, and how sad it was that Whitney Houston lost her battle with the demons that drove her to her death. And suddenly I was thunderstruck. I realized that up until the past month, I had been doing the same thing with my weight and food. And if I didn't win the battle, I would end up the same way as Whitney... VERY SOON.
I don't remember much about the last mile of walking except for two things. First, the heavy cotton t-shirt that I knew was a mistake weighed about 5x more than it did when I started walking from all the sweat. Second, there was no way I wasn't going to finish those two miles.
Well, I did. And though you will never read about it in the newspaper and I won't be named Time Man of the Year, I did it. I won my version of the Alamo. I won my version of Waterloo. I won my version of the Cuban Missile Crisis. In 36 minutes of brisk walking, I turned that Red Minus 317 into a Big Green Happy 94. Hurray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here's to all of you winning YOUR personal Alamos, Waterloos and Cuban Missile Crises. As for me, I am going to rehydrate and drag my stinky self into a nice cool shower. Have a wonderful evening wherever you are!
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Replies
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Nice work!!!!!!!!!0
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LOL great story, have your drumstick and eat it too. You did good, turn the minus into a plus, against all those odds. I'm inspired.
I have found these --> http://www.drumstick.com/flavors/lil-drums-caramel.aspx
and they work for me.0 -
Awesome....all it takes is one decision at a time! Congrats on making a great one!0
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You are the best!! Congrats to you!! WELL DONE!!0
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Great job!0
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Awesome story, I really enjoyed reading it. You are a great writer! Best of luck on your journey
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Way to go!!0
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you are an inspiration! thanks for sharing the story, and congratulations on living it! you are clearly the man;)0
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That was an amazing read. So many high fives to you and your victory today. Victories, actually... each time you wanted to say "Hell, No!" and you said instead, "Hell, Yes!" You are right up there with Superman today, my friend.0
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Wow that's awesome..good for you!!! :-)0
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LOL that is epic dude, way to go!0
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I really enjoyed your story; it was very inspirational. Congratulations on making today a success. With that attitude, I believe you're going to have many more.0
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Great post. I used to wonder why I plateaued but your post makes a big case for RED NUMBERS and letting them slide thru cuz they're "not that far over". It's a slippery slope, to be sure.
Great win my friend, and nicely written too!
xo Deedee0 -
Thankyou for shareing part of your journey, It's very Inspirational. This is something I needed to hear and use starting Tomorrow.
Forget about the excuses and just do it. Thank You for posting. 0 -
I can relate to your story. I will do extra exercises so that I don't see red.Nicely done!0
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Definitely an epic win!
Very motivational & entertaining.
And BTW, I almost decided to become a lesbian the way you were describing "her", lol.0 -
your story isvery encouraging. someties i want to indulge too. andusualy 'm pretty good wit telling myself "yu ate tese cookies, ot ou have to brn them off" my way of havn my cake and eating it too. i'm stil fairly new to this but i cant wait to see my numbers on the scale drop significantly. but i know it takes time and edication and Honesty. even if i do look ike a total fatty withall i've eaten that day, i till log in hoonestly. and suprise myself when i'm stil under my calories for the day BEFORE exercise. but you kep it up. you have alot of support here0
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Very inspiring! You had an oopsie but turned it around the right way. Good on you!0
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Way to Go!! Long winded as it was, I actually read the entire story. Kudos to you!!!! :flowerforyou:0
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This is the best post I've read in awhile! Very inspirational!! Thanks for sharing!0
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Good to read such a story 07:08 am, while I'm sleepy and wondering if it isn't to early for jogging, working out, etc. You just answered my questions man - anyone who wants to achieve something should do what they have to do. Period.
Congratulations on you success - this particular one and on the long term. Keep winning and have a great weekend! 0 -
Awesome resolve to go for your walk. Awesome that you recognized that food is our drug, our alcohol. But you didn't let the RED 317 beat you down. Loved your post... Made me smile!
And congrats on the 20#s...0 -
Kudos to you and thanks for sharing!!!0
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Fantastic storytelling, and inspiring. This made me smile. Good for you! 0
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Great story. Well done0
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OMG what an awesome success story! I LOVE your style of writing. You did such a great job overcoming your temptation! :drinker:0
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Fantastic storytelling, and inspiring. This made me smile. Good for you!
These were my exact thoughts.......way to go!0 -
Such an inspiring (and entertaining) post! Congratulations to you!!!:drinker:0
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You are an amazing writer! I loved reading your story! Congratulations on not giving into the psychological agony of those red numbers!0
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I really like the way this is written.
I particularly like the way you've pointed out so many things that we'd find to make an excuse before we've even left the house.
Whenever you feel like you can't do it, read this.0
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