When life gets you down!

Sweet_Pandora

My healthiness journey has been a long but constant one.

I started weight watchers at the age of 16 and from there I have been battling my weight on and off through the years.

Is it the weight I am battling or life.

I know to lose weight you need to be healthy in mind and body. You need to make healthy choices in eating and you need to make a committment to yourself to move your body and exercise.

When the going gets tough the tough get going!

Very easy to understand a little more difficult to implement into your life and requires discipline to stay the course.

I've noticed a pattern I commit to myself to make time for me. I am a mother with a full time career, a partner to a very supportive and loving man, a friend to many and the most challenging is being the caregiver to my 82 year old father who has dementia and is a hoarder. When I get stressed or I am dealing with a difficult situation I forget about me, I say WTF and give up for a few days sometimes a week or two.

The past week has been very challenging dealing with my father, his fears, his demands and trying to calm him down and soothe him and reassure him. I do it without hesitation, it is difficult at times but he is my father and he needs me. I remind myself of all of the things that he has done for me through my life to make me who I am.

What I have noticed when I am faced with difficult weeks I either run my frustration off or I sleep. Sleep is my way of avoiding reality.

I need to find a balance, I need to learn that it's ok to take a day off as long as it doesn't turn into 2 days and then 3......

I'm not sure what I'm asking here I know that the answer lies within me. I see the pattern, I can't skip work, I can't stop being a mother, a partner or caring for my father so I stop taking care of myself. Why, it doesn't make me feel better, it sets me back and makes me feel worse. I ate a donut, I skipped two days of working out. I guess I need to accept that I am human not super woman.

Some days are easy and some days aren't so easy.

I guess I just need to let it out, not be so rigid with myself and take it one day at a time. I'm not perfect, I don't want to be perfect I just want to be the best I can and keep trying to deal with my trials and tribulations and still enjoy the wonderful life that I have.

Suggestions and advice are always welcome.

If it were easy none of us would be here.

Thanks for taking the time to read.

Karen

LeslieC1970

Wow. You have a lot of pressure right now. My friend deals with dimentia of a parent and she is very much in the same situation. After struggling to be all things to everyone, she ended up getting profession health care workers to come in. This allowed her to step back a bit and recharge. It was not that she was not engaged, it was that she had professionals helping her so she was able to strike a better balance for herself and the other family members.

My only advice would be to check into getting some extra help and try not to be too hard on yourself. You need your time to take care of you too.

Sweet_Pandora

Thanks Leslie

My father is in a fabulous retirment home that takes very good care of him. I am the only family involved with him so he calls constantly at all hours of the day and night. My daughter and partner are very supportive and help in any way that they can. Like I said some days are easier than others.

Karen

LeslieC1970

I understand and I am glad you have help. While not the same situation, I have had to ask my siblings to help with my parents from time to time who are not mobile and need help going places and with situations in their home.

I think it is great that you are so attentive to your father.

robin49505

I hear ya sister! I think you nailed it with your comment "I guess I need to accept that I am human not super woman." We expect perfection out of ourselves in regards to our care giving of others but we end up being so imperfect when we take care of ourselves! I don't know why that is but I struggle with the same issues. I put everything around me before me. My working out sometimes falls so low on the list of priorities that I go days w/o a good calorie burn. It sounded like you needed to vent and I'm glad you did. You have come so far and done so well that you should be very proud of yourself! And why is it we can never pat ourselves on the back? I think people like you and me need to stop and focus the things we do accomplish FOR OURSELVES and not focus on the shortcomings to ourselves. Two things that help me - consistancy will get me there and focus on today, not tomorrow, not yesterday. Easier said than done, I know - but we need to consistantly reminds ourselves of this.........