frustrated, confused, and ready to quit. HALP!!

hello everybody! i'm 4'11 and i started my weight loss journey last june at about 148lbs. i may have actually been heavier than that, but i stopped weighing myself at that point. by tracking calories, walking 30-45 minutes a day, and doing jillian michael's 30 day shred, i was able to lose about 30lbs and i weighed 115lbs in january of 2012. i reached my recent lowest of 113lbs in april of 2012, but then i switched to a new job and could no longer enjoy my lunch break walks. i also had very little spare time so i stopped tracking my calories.

after quitting tracking calories, i obviously put on a couple of pounds. i joined a gym at the end of may, and since then i have only GOTTEN BIGGER in both weight and waist measurements. now, i know muscle is denser than fat and gaining muscle can lead to weight gain -- but i've been going to the gym for almost three months now -- what gives? i took a short break in july after getting eye surgery, but since then, i've been going at least 4 times a week for an hour or more each time.

my typical gym visit includes stretching, then ten minutes or so of free weight exercises. i do bicep curls, squats, lunges, chest flies, and a few other exercises (but i don't know what they're called :\). i use 3-10lb dumbbells depending on the exercise -- i try to keep it where it's just heavy enough for me to do 20-30 reps of whatever i'm doing. then i go on to the machines -- i do the oblique twist machine, the leg press, the leg abducter and adducter, and also the crunch machine. then i'll go on the treadmill for about a half hour -- i'm on week 3 of the couch to 5 k program. i used to be a runner in highschool (ten years ago, yikes) and i'm trying to get in that shape again. a few days a week, i'll only do 15-20 minutes of weights, followed by a 45 minute class (zumba, pilates, yoga, toning) and follow that with the c25k also. on days where i can't make it to the gym, i still try to walk 30 mins to an hour. i don't do a lot of crunches or sit-ups aside from the ones we do in class because i have a heavy chest and they really hurt my back. i know that's a lame excuse, but it's true, and if my form was really that whack i feel like someone would have corrected me by now.

i'm eating back most of the exercise calories, and i determine those using MFP's calculations. i know they may be inaccurate, but they have to be better than the gym machines that severely overestimate my calorie burn because they don't take my height into consideration. right now i'm temporarily laid off from my job so i can't afford an HRM but i've heard that they're a much better gauge for calorie burning.

i'm also the type of person that weighs themselves at every given opportunity. to reduce this habit, i had my boyfriend put my scale on top of the bathroom cabinet where i can't reach it. after avoiding the scale for an entire week, i used it today and found that i somehow gained four pounds since last week. at this point, i am entirely frustrated and disgusted with myself. it seems like the better i eat and the harder i work at the gym, the more weight i put on. i've taken my waist and stomach measurements, and those haven't gone down either.

that said ... i'm a bridesmaid in a wedding at the end of this october. i bought a size 4 dress back in april because it fit me at the time, but now it's very very very snug. i can't zip it on my own, but if somebody helps me, then we can close it but it's not very comfortable. aside from wearing industrial strength spanx, what can i do to fit into the dress in time? i think it's too late to get it altered, i can't return it, and i don't have the money to buy a size 6. i'm not trying to reach a certain "goal weight" by then because back in april, i somehow thought that i could make it down to 105lbs and clearly that's not happening if i keep gaining. my goal is to just fit in this dress without looking like an overstuffed sausage.

any tips? i'm really at my wit's end. i heard that losing the last 10-20lbs is hard for a lot of people but i didn't think that it would be THIS hard. i truly thought that joining the gym would accelerate my weight loss but it seems to be doing the exact opposite, and it's so discouraging. HELP!!!

by the way, i have progress pictures in my profile and while i am pleased with what i've accomplished so far, i feel like i still have a while to go. i think my food diary is also open, so feel free to check that out. i try to eat "in moderation" but i could be missing something. any helpful suggestions would be greatly appreciated. thanks!
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Replies

  • MTBrob
    MTBrob Posts: 513 Member
    open your diary.
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    oops, thought it was open. it is now. thanks.

    looking back, it's totally the snacking that's killing me. and maybe the alcohol, but i only have a few drinks a week and most of the time i don't end up finishing them.
  • MTBrob
    MTBrob Posts: 513 Member
    Pretty simple fix to your issue..

    STOP

    eating pizza

    McDonalds,

    Ice coffee drinks ..

    and other un healthy foods


    Start

    Eating more fruits and veggies and LEAN protein like Turkey Chicken lean beef....

    Drink more water instead of sugary drinks..


    work out 3- 5 days a week and be consistent... issue is now resolved.
  • lmfco46
    lmfco46 Posts: 9
    Don't forget...depending on the time of the month it could simply be water retention. Make sure you are staying well hydrated too. With your cardio there are levels where you will burn more fat versus training the actual cardio portion. I've found for myself, that varying the speeds over the duration of my 60 min on the treadmill has been beneficial. If you have a lot salt intake that also can retain water for some.

    DON"T GIVE UP!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!! you've come so far don't give in now. You can do this even with this frustration. Hang in there!!
  • melaniecheeks
    melaniecheeks Posts: 6,349 Member
    Less carbs, more protein, and your sodium is ALWAYS over - try to identify the big culprits there and work on reducing that figure.
  • sunshine_gem
    sunshine_gem Posts: 390 Member
    ^^^This. Your diet is not great. You're eating a lot of processed foods. Add more fruit and veg and fresh foods. And yeah, drink water. This will help flush out the crap.
  • Maridar
    Maridar Posts: 164 Member
    I didn't check your diary but if that's what you are eating, pizza and macs on a regular basis not wonder you gained wegiht. Pack your own healthy lunches. I do, saves me money and I know I am eating healthy. You'll see the difference.
  • Maryaly40
    Maryaly40 Posts: 551 Member
    Also, careful eating back those exercise calories. I'm 5'0, when I go over my recommended 1200, I stay the same weight or go up a pound or 2 (water gain, carb gain I know). Unfortunately, we petites have to be mindful of our calories and from where they come. The guy above is right with WHAT your eating. You have to eat clean. (And those fancy coffee's are a killer, take it from someone who LOVES them)
  • cheerforsteelers
    cheerforsteelers Posts: 686 Member
    Pretty simple fix to your issue..

    STOP

    eating pizza

    McDonalds,

    Ice coffee drinks ..

    and other un healthy foods


    Start

    Eating more fruits and veggies and LEAN protein like Turkey Chicken lean beef....

    Drink more water instead of sugary drinks..


    work out 3- 5 days a week and be consistent... issue is now resolved.

    This. Also, I noticed you eat a lot of sodium. One dinner had over 3,000 mg of sodium! :noway: Watch your intake of sodium as well.
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    thanks. to clarify, i didn't "eat" any mcdonald's - i had a small smoothie because i wanted sugar in my blood before getting a tattoo. i haven't ate mcdonald's in a while and i know that it's not real food.

    as for the iced coffee, i never drink it and i didn't think one coffee drink a month, if even that often, is what's hindering my weight loss.

    the only time i drink soda or sugary drinks is with alcohol. i try to use diet soda or juice when mixing with alcohol, and again, that's only a few drinks a week. i drink a ton of water but i don't log it. i'm always filling up a bottle.

    any ideas on what sort of workouts i should try? because i HAVE been working out 3-5 times a week.

    thanks for your help!
  • Squiggs67
    Squiggs67 Posts: 178
    Great advice so far. Also, lose the wheat and processed foods. If it comes out of a box or a can...DON'T EAT IT!!
  • Curvimami
    Curvimami Posts: 1,851 Member
    So your diet is the culprit. On top of the weightlifting your bulking up. And looking at your profile pic. You dont look too out of shape, You look solid and curvy. The food and the weights are making you buff. On the brightside you dont look soft. Change your diet and your body will change in the direction you are looking for. Good Luck :smile:
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    I didn't check your diary but if that's what you are eating, pizza and macs on a regular basis not wonder you gained wegiht. Pack your own healthy lunches. I do, saves me money and I know I am eating healthy. You'll see the difference.

    i don't eat pizza and macs on a regular basis. the mcdonald's that he's referencing is from a smoothie that i drank so i didn't feel faint during a tattoo. right now i'm laid off from my job, so i'm eating at home. not seeing a difference :(
  • lovinmyselfagain
    lovinmyselfagain Posts: 307 Member
    Too much sodium and little or no water is a bad combination. Eat more fruits and vegetables and less fast food. Try plain Greek yogurt with fresh/frozen fruit, instead of fruit already added to it-this will cut down on unnecessary sugar. You can totally lose 10lbs or more by the end of October if you change your eating habits. Good luck!
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    Also, careful eating back those exercise calories. I'm 5'0, when I go over my recommended 1200, I stay the same weight or go up a pound or 2 (water gain, carb gain I know). Unfortunately, we petites have to be mindful of our calories and from where they come. The guy above is right with WHAT your eating. You have to eat clean. (And those fancy coffee's are a killer, take it from someone who LOVES them)

    would you suggest not eating back the exercise calories? after i work out, i want to eat EVERYTHING.
  • FutureMrsWarby
    FutureMrsWarby Posts: 96 Member
    You have to recognize that most of what everyone is telling you is constructive criticism. If you just make excuses for your choices, you'll not get anywhere.

    you're not eating clean and you won't lose any real weight until you cut out the denny's, mc donalds and other fast food...buy lean meats and chicken and eat fresh veggies and fruit. stay away from salt.
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    so i've gathered that i should replace alcohol, bread, and sodium with more vegetables and water. i didn't realize that my sodium was so out of control.

    thanks everybody! and super thanks for not being nasty about it :)
  • beansprouts
    beansprouts Posts: 410 Member
    Your long term commitment to food logging sucks! It looks like for the last few weeks you may have been logging your food...But prior to that...wow!...lots of nothing. No wonder you are confused.
  • lg3703
    lg3703 Posts: 190
    Switch up your routine too. I SWEAR by free weights and old school conditioning... push ups, sit ups, raised planks... if you can do 30 reps- its too easy. Good luck and go by inches, not lbs.
  • niftyafterfifty
    niftyafterfifty Posts: 338 Member
    I agree with the others. You're eating too many sweets and processed foods. Smoothies are not necessarily your friend, either. Eliminating wheat and sugar from your diet can make a big difference. I read an article today that recommended exercising before you eat. Your body will burn your fat stores. You might want to try that. Concentrate more on aerobics for fat loss than on weights for strength, at least for now. It might help you get in that dress. I would not eat back all the exercise calories. I would only eat half of them if even that many. Best wishes.
  • yksdoris
    yksdoris Posts: 327 Member
    I got stuck a while ago on my weightloss journey (just 10 lb grom goal) and I'm a shortie too - 5'1. So, what helped me was tweaking the carb/protein proportions

    I *try* to hit my protein marks by eating lots of cottage cheese, chicken, tuna and salmon, beans, broccoli, eggs etc. Whenever I eat carbs I try to combine that with items that are also high on fiber as that makes it easier for the food to get processed.

    (you can take a look at my diary, it's open to all IIRC. except please skip the last 2 weeks, I was on vacation and ate whatever I wanted though I did try to guesstimate how much it was. When I got back from my vacation the scale said I was 4 lb heavier than when I went but in just 3 days I'm back to where I left off, guess it was all just water weight or the body still processing all that food)
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    You have to recognize that most of what everyone is telling you is constructive criticism. If you just make excuses for your choices, you'll not get anywhere.

    you're not eating clean and you won't lose any real weight until you cut out the denny's, mc donalds and other fast food...buy lean meats and chicken and eat fresh veggies and fruit. stay away from salt.

    the thing is, i DID lose 30 pounds while eating "dirty." i thought i was doing it in moderation (and choosing "healthy" options when out), but i guess i was just fooling myself. i realize it's constructive criticism, that's what i was asking for, and i appreciate the input. it's easy to make excuses, i'm sure everyone has done the same at some point, but i'm definitely going to keep all of this in mind next time i want to inhale some salty fatty things.
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    Your long term commitment to food logging sucks! It looks like for the last few weeks you may have been logging your food...But prior to that...wow!...lots of nothing. No wonder you are confused.

    i did mention that i stopped logging for months and i know that's a huge problem. i'm trying to track again. thank you for your helpful comment -___-
  • NewChristina
    NewChristina Posts: 250 Member
    You may not be as big as you think you are. Lower your sodium intake for a couple of days. Drink plenty of water and see what happens. You may be just bloated.
  • MTBrob
    MTBrob Posts: 513 Member
    Ok ok .. fine you say you are not eating those on a consistent basis.. thats good.. However.. the choices are still bad.. Replace what I said STOP with Bad Process food and still follow what I said to Start and your issue is still resolved..
  • graceylou222
    graceylou222 Posts: 198 Member
    Pretty simple fix to your issue..

    STOP

    eating pizza

    McDonalds,

    Ice coffee drinks ..

    and other un healthy foods


    Start

    Eating more fruits and veggies and LEAN protein like Turkey Chicken lean beef....

    Drink more water instead of sugary drinks..


    work out 3- 5 days a week and be consistent... issue is now resolved.

    I agree with this. Sometimes we all have bad days, weeks, but you can't let it get out of control. Honestly my biggest thing is alcohol, I don't ever log it, but I bet if we didn't drink any for 2 weeks we would notice a small difference.... And pizza, ah pizza. lol
  • squigglypuff
    squigglypuff Posts: 279 Member
    I agree with the others. You're eating too many sweets and processed foods. Smoothies are not necessarily your friend, either. Eliminating wheat and sugar from your diet can make a big difference. I read an article today that recommended exercising before you eat. Your body will burn your fat stores. You might want to try that. Concentrate more on aerobics for fat loss than on weights for strength, at least for now. It might help you get in that dress. I would not eat back all the exercise calories. I would only eat half of them if even that many. Best wishes.

    i've read that too much cardio is not the best way for short people to lose weight because it increases the appetite too much. i've also read that too much weight training is bad because it makes short people bulk up. i'm seeing a lot of conflicting information when it comes to what sort of exercise would be best for me, and that's another reason i'm so confused. thanks for the help!
  • Also, careful eating back those exercise calories. I'm 5'0, when I go over my recommended 1200, I stay the same weight or go up a pound or 2 (water gain, carb gain I know). Unfortunately, we petites have to be mindful of our calories and from where they come. The guy above is right with WHAT your eating. You have to eat clean. (And those fancy coffee's are a killer, take it from someone who LOVES them)

    would you suggest not eating back the exercise calories? after i work out, i want to eat EVERYTHING.

    If you feel hungry after a work out try just drinking a couple of glasses of water. It will fill you up in no time or have a piece of fruit.
  • kls13la
    kls13la Posts: 377 Member
    Are you using a HRM to calculate your workout calories? You've got 900+ and 700+ in your diary, which seems like a lot for a person of your size and the workouts you described. Eating back too many calories could definitely throw you off.
  • Tonga32
    Tonga32 Posts: 2
    OMG. I felt like i was reading my history. My story is the exact same. I thought it was just me but guess not . Hopefully we get answers soon. I too have a wedding coming up and I want to look my best.